LOVE this!!!

Thanks sista!

There's a question that's been on my mind lately: What will be the next object of attack from Mr. Two the Nines's camp? I mean, my contempt for Two is boundless. Instead of focusing on why Two's activities are but a speck in a constellation of methodologies used by propagandism to impose ideology, control thought, and punish virtually any behavior Two disapproves of, I would like to remind people that we've all heard Two yammer and whine about how he's being scapegoated again, the poor dear. Whatever else may be the case, it is certain that he likes to cite poll results that "prove" that he can permit malodorous Philistines to rise to positions of leadership and authority and get away with it. Really? Have you ever been contacted by one of his pollsters? Chances are good that you have never been contacted and never will be. Otherwise, the polls would show that Two wants to twist the truth. Who does he think he is? I mean, his true goal is to impair the practice of democracy. All the statements that his assistants make to justify or downplay that goal are only apologetics; they do nothing to build bridges where in the past all that existed were moats and drawbridges. That's a very important point; as that last sentence suggests, Two's manuscripts are continually evolving into more and more uppity incarnations. Here, I'm not just talking about evolution in a simply Darwinist sense; I'm also talking about how if the human race is to survive on this planet, we will have to stop this insanity. To sum it all up, what Mr. Two the Nines seems to be forgetting is that his sound bites are not just retroactively ineffective but proactively inert.

My complaint about Sr. Nathan K Renner, Esq.
There are people I definitely despise. They lack morals, character, and honesty. They incite an atmosphere of violence and endangerment toward the good men, women, and children of this state. In case you can't tell, I'm talking about Sr. Nathan K Renner, Esq. here. Permit me this forum to rant.

What conclusion should we draw from his reports? How about that according to him, anyone who points this out is guilty of spreading lies, smears, and antidisestablishmentarianism? To bring the matter closer to home, let me remind you that if the only way to deal summarily with effete braggarts is for me to have a conniption, then so be it. It would doubtlessly be worth it, because this is a transparent attempt to create division in the name of diversity. Let me try to explain what I mean by that in a single sentence: Sr. Renner is completely gung-ho about hedonism because he lacks more pressing soapbox issues.

The key point here is that if you're interested in the finagling, double-dealing, chicanery, cheating, cajolery, cunning, rascality, and abject villainy by which Sr. Renner may supply the chains that bind the individual to notions of self-loathing and unworthiness faster than you can say "microclimatological", then you'll want to consider the following very carefully. You'll especially want to consider that if history follows its course, it should be evident that if Sr. Renner succeeds in his attempt to feed blind hatred, it'll have to be over my dead body. The following is a preliminary attempt to establish some criteria for discussion of these complex issues. To begin with, Sr. Renner's arguments would be a lot more effective if they were at least accurate or intelligent, not just a load of bull for the sake of being controversial. My own position on this issue is both simple and clear: Sr. Renner's reason is not true reason. It does not seek the truth, but only incorrigible answers, hectoring resolutions to conflicts.

Given Sr. Renner's propensity for repression in the service of paradigmatic integrity, it is little wonder that Sr. Renner claims that he has been robbed of all he does not possess. Predictably, he cites no hard data for that claim. This is because no such data exist. He confuses entertainment with learning. That's the current situation, and if you have any doubt about the reality of it, then you haven't been paying close enough attention to what's been happening in the world. On a similar note, Sr. Renner uses the very intellectual tools he criticizes, namely consequentialist arguments rather than arguments about truth or falsity.

Due to the power relationship between the dominator and the dominated, his belief that university professors must conform their theses and conclusions to his lame-brained prejudices if they want to publish papers and advance their careers is pure and total fantasy. If you don't believe me, see for yourself. In case you have any doubts, there is a simple answer to the question of what to do about Sr. Renner's platitudes. The difficult part is in implementing the answer. The answer is that we must change the world for the better.

Of course, in a discussion of this type, one should indeed mention that it's possible that Sr. Renner doesn't realize this because he has been ingrained with so much of Stalinism's propaganda. If that's the case, I recommend that we step back and consider the problem of his taradiddles in the larger picture of popular culture imagery. In hearing about his analects, one gets the distinct impression that this is not wild speculation. This is not a conspiracy theory. This is documented fact. Because "flocinauinihilipilification" is a word that can be interpreted in many ways, we must make it clear that Sr. Renner is the picture of the insane person on the street, babbling to a tree, a wall, or a cloud, which cannot and does not respond to his practices. It may be obvious but should nonetheless be acknowledged that he commonly appoints ineffective people to important positions. He then ensures that these people stay in those positions, because that makes it easy for him to trick academics into abandoning the principles of scientific inquiry.

While perhaps offensive to some readers, only a direct quote can fully convey the delusional nature and content of Sr. Renner's harangues: "Attention, worshippers, who are legion! Your orders are to give self-absorbed, morally repugnant individuals far more credibility than they deserve, and to do so at any cost." Sr. Renner's subordinates insist that "disagreeable hell-raisers make the best scout leaders and schoolteachers." First off, that's a lousy sentence. If they had written that the quasi-snotty and confused nature of Sr. Renner's obiter dicta should indicate to us that something needs to be done, then that quote would have had more validity. As it stands, if Sr. Renner thinks that he can make me die in oppression, chaos, and despair, then he's barking up the wrong tree.

It takes more than a mass of jaded, mean-spirited ruffians to enable all people to achieve their potential as human beings. It takes a great many thoughtful and semi-thoughtful people who are willing to take the initiative to debunk the nonsense spouted by his accomplices. If you think that pessimism is a noble goal, then you're suffering from very serious nearsightedness. You're focusing too much on what he wants you to see and failing to observe many other things of much greater importance. Not to be rude or anything, but Sr. Renner has written volumes about how cultural tradition has never contributed a single thing to the advancement of knowledge or understanding. Don't believe a word of it, though. The truth is that he is terrified that there might be an absolute reality outside himself, a reality that is what it is, regardless of his wishes, theories, hopes, daydreams, or decrees.

A deep, ineradicable hatred of everything that is not officious energizes him to strap us down with a network of rules and regulations. Okay, that's a slight exaggeration, but you get the general drift. I think we can indubitably say that Sr. Renner has been trying for some time to convince people that his ruses won't be used for political retribution. Don't believe his hype! Sr. Renner has just been offering that line as a means to meddle in everyone else's affairs.

Aside from the fact that the underlying reasons and causes for his malicious snow jobs must be defined, examined, and resolved, or they'll never cease, his peons' thinking is fenced in by many constraints. Their minds are not free because they dare not be. Racialism doesn't work. So why does Sr. Renner cling to it? You know the answer, don't you? You probably also know that when I was younger, I wanted to take up the mantle and provide an atmosphere of mutual respect, free from exclusionism, gnosticism, and all other forms of prejudice and intolerance. I still want to do that, but now I realize that we must focus on concrete facts, on hard news, on analyzing and interpreting what's happening in the world. To do anything else, and I do mean anything else, is a complete waste of time. Now that this letter is over, I pray that my logic and passion have convinced you that Sr. Nathan K Renner, Esq.'s writings exhibit a disregard, not merely for style, but for the truth.

YES!!! I thought this was hilarious too! I got this in an email today from a friend who needed to put her boss's name on this! LOL

FUNNY STUFF!!!

WillieThePimp:

It is imperative that I give you the following information, which Willie The Pimp wants concealed from the public. Now, I don't want to insult your intelligence by telling you the following 50 times, but Pimp does not have a record of tolerance. That's the sort of statement that some people insist is crude, but which I believe is merely a statement of fact. And it's a statement that needs to be made, because it's unfortunate that Pimp has no real education.

It's impossible to debate important topics with someone who is so mentally handicapped. But being a generally genteel person, however, I always bite my tongue. If he isn't lame-brained, I don't know who is. I do not appreciate being labeled. No one does. Nevertheless, we must remove our chains and move towards the light. (In case you didn't understand that analogy, the chains symbolize Pimp's hopeless allegations, and the light represents the goal of getting all of us to build a true community of spirit and purpose based on mutual respect and caring.)

While self-justification may motivate pigheaded, disagreeable flibbertigibbets, the same also works well for grotesque misogynists. I have a dream, a mission, a set path that I would like to travel down. Specifically, my goal is to expand people's understanding of Pimp's closed-minded, brown-nosing perorations. Of course, he constantly insists that some people deserve to feel safe while others do not. But he contradicts himself when he says that he can give me reason to react violently and get away with it.

Unscrupulous, eccentric jackanapes (like Pimp) are not born -- they are excreted. However unsavory that metaphor may be, there is a format Pimp should follow for his next literary endeavor. It involves a topic sentence and supporting facts. I and Pimp part company when it comes to the issue of alcoholism.

If I may be so bold, his plans for the future are built on lies, and they depend on make-believe for their continuation. I am getting tired of sweeping up after repeated Willie The Pimp fiascoes. I know because I have experienced that personally. Okay, I've vented enough frustration. So let me end by saying that Willie The Pimp is doing more harm than good to his cause.

I bet this doesn't get deleted until somebody puts Prince's name on here. lol
With all that is posted complaint wise about him people can just use this as their form letter! LOL

I don't have any complaints about him (at the moment anyway) LOL so I'll leave this up to the complainers.

CarrieLee said:

I think Carrie is enjoying this a little too much.

My complaint about prince.org

Even as I sit here, I can't believe I'm writing this. I've never been one to voice my opinions in such a public manner. But after learning that prince.org wants to level filth and slime at everyone opposed to its reports, I felt I at least had to set a few things straight. I would like to start by discussing its subliminal psywar campaigns, mainly because they scare me. The thing I'm the most frightened about is that it would not hesitate to deploy enormous resources in a war of attrition against helpless citizens if it felt it could benefit from doing so. It behooves us to remember that it takes more than a mass of materialistic, discourteous televangelists to open students' eyes, minds, hearts, and souls to the world around them. It takes a great many thoughtful and semi-thoughtful people who are willing to stop this insanity. I, hardheaded cynic that I am, am convinced that there will be a strong effort on prince.org's part to challenge all I stand for in the near future. This effort will be disguised, of course. It will be cloaked in deceit, as such efforts always are. That's why I'm informing you that if prince.org has spurred us to criticize its propositions publically for their formalistic categories, their spurious claims of neutrality, and their blindness to the abuse of private power, then prince.org may have accomplished a useful thing.

Don't let yourself be persuaded by illiterate, gutless propagandists who secretly want to create new (and reinforce existing) prejudices and misconceptions. No one can be right all of the time. That is to say, prince.org is a pretty good liar most of the time. However, it tells so many lies, it's bound to trip itself up someday.

Prince.org has never tried to stop deluded worrywarts who revive an arcadian past that never existed. In fact, quite the opposite is true: prince.org encourages that sort of behavior. I happen to believe that prince.org is living in cloud-cuckoo-land. But it goes further than that; I oppose prince.org's bons mots because they are misguided. I oppose them because they are dissolute. And I oppose them because they will popularize a genre of music whose graphic lyrics explicitly urge the worst classes of jealous self-proclaimed arbiters of taste and standards there are to base racial definitions on lineage, phrenological characteristics, skin hue, and religion quicker than you can double-check

For those who know me, they know it is a rare occurrence for me to be rendered speechless. But when I heard that Prof. Ian fuckface Renner I wants to conceal information and, occasionally, blatantly lie, I must say that speechless I was. The nitty-gritty of what I'm about to write is this: We can all have daydreams about Happy Fuzzy Purple Bunny Land, where everyone is caring, loving, and nice. Not only will those daydreams not come true, but he refers to a variety of things using the word "anthropomorphologically". Translating this bit of jargon into English isn't easy. Basically, he's saying that he has the mandate of Heaven to mold the mind of virtually every citizen -- young or old, rich or poor, simple or sophisticated. At any rate, no clear-thinking individual would have the temerity to cater to the basest instincts of the worst sorts of voluble spiteful-types there are (also known as Ian's loyalists). His hirelings probably don't realize that, because it's not mentioned in the funny papers or in the movies. Nevertheless, if you read Ian's writings while mentally out of focus, you may get the sense that Ian has his moral compass in tact. But if you read his writings while mentally in focus and weigh each point carefully, it's clear that if he opened his eyes, he'd realize that the things he wants to do are unfair, if not illegal. As a general rule, Ian is right about one thing, namely that fear is what motivates us. Fear of what it means when misinformed knee-biters leave helpless citizens afraid in the streets, in their jobs, and even in their homes. Fear of what it says about our society when we teach our children that a book of Ian's writings would be a good addition to the Bible. And fear of heinous pettifoggers like Ian who silence critical debate and squelch creative brainstorming. If you can go more than a minute without hearing him talk about boosterism, you're either deaf, dumb, or in a serious case of denial. You don't have to say anything specifically about Ian for him to start attacking you. All you have to do is dare to imply that I should build a world overflowing with compassion and tolerance. The great irony is that he teaches workshops on metagrobolism. Students who have been through the program compare it to a Communist re-education camp.

It's a well-known fact that the continuing misunderstandings that some cynical, impudent louts seem to have merely underscore this point. It's an equally well-known fact that Ian should practice what he preaches. When logic puts these two facts together, the necessary result is an understanding that if there's an untold story here, it's that Ian thinks that everyone and everything discriminates against him -- including the writing on the bathroom stalls. However, giving him the means to parlay personal and political conspiracy theories into a multimillion-dollar financial empire is like supplying the gun to your own robber. Of all of his exaggerations and incorrect comparisons, one in particular stands out: "Obscurity, evasiveness, incomprehensibility, indirectness, and ambiguity are marks of depth and brilliance." I don't know where he came up with this, but his statement is dead wrong. If Ian continues to assuage the hungers of his adherents with servings of fresh scapegoats, I will be obliged to do something about him. And you know me: I never neglect my obligations. Let me end by appealing to our collective sense of humanity: False denials, pleas for sympathy, and a base campaign for smearing others with his own crimes constitute Prof. Ian fuckface Renner I's whole method of defense.

Good lord, I didn't think it would be so popular!!!

2the9s said:

This is the FLAME WAR EXTRAORDINAIRE!!!

TRON said:

It's true...so so true...

My complaint about Mme Tracy GweQ Coates III
Something is happening here, and I'm getting a little worried. In the text that follows, I won't bother discussing the flaws in Mme Tracy GweQ Coates III's logic, because she certainly doesn't use any logic. Many of her reinterpretations of historic events are seriously flawed, frequently fail to meet minimal standards of logic, and, on balance, are hidebound. But that's not the end of the story. She contends that everyone with a different set of beliefs from hers is going to get a one-way ticket to Hell. Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from?

Forgive me if I ramble; I'm really upset, as I think you can tell. Tracy is not interested in what is true and what is false or in what is good and what is evil. In fact, those distinctions have no meaning to her whatsoever. The only thing that has any meaning to Tracy is quislingism. Why? You know the answer, don't you? You probably also know that Tracy dreams of a time when she'll be free to up the ante considerably. That's the way she's planned it, and that's the way it'll happen -- not may happen, but will happen -- if we don't interfere, if we don't think outside the box. Whenever she tries to judge people based solely on hearsay, so do the most humorless big-labor bosses you'll ever see. Similarly, whenever she attempts to focus too much on one side of the equation and not enough on the broader perspective of things, the worst classes of rude propagandists there are typically attempt the same. I do not seek to draw any causal scheme from these correlations. I mention them only because you may be wondering why the worst types of unreasonable peddlers of snake-oil remedies I've ever seen latch onto her policies. It's because people of that nature need to have rhetoric and dogma to recite during times of stress in order to cope. That's also why in a tacit concession of defeat, Tracy is now openly calling for the abridgment of various freedoms to accomplish coercively what her contemptible inclinations have failed at.

She is locked into her present course of destruction. She does not have the interest or the will to change her fundamentally crude proposed social programs. I am not trying to save the world -- I gave up that pursuit a long time ago. But I am trying to shelter initially unpopular truths from suppression, enabling them to ultimately win out through competition in the marketplace of ideas. I wonder what would happen if Tracy really did ignore compromise and focus solely on her personal agenda. There's a spooky thought. To wrap up, I'll just hit the key elements of this letter one last time. First, one can see the blood-lust in Mme Tracy GweQ Coates III's eyes. Second, the big parlor game among her trucklers is guessing which of them was the first to leave helpless citizens afraid in the streets, in their jobs, and even in their homes. And finally, all she does is complain, complain, complain.

Open Letter to Lleena:

Some of my colleagues recommended that I write a letter about how Princess Lleena is living in cloud-cuckoo-land. This is that letter. By way of introduction, let me just say that I should note that Lleena is inherently slimy, deluded, and useless. Oh, and she also has a sappy mode of existence.

There are three fairly obvious problems with Lleena's solutions, each of which needs to be addressed by any letter that attempts to create and nurture a true spirit of community. First, the reasons that Lleena gives for her sermons clearly do not correspond with her real motives.

Second, it is far too easy for Lleena to use fear, intimidation, sedating substances, and other tools to convince jealous mattoids to depressurize the frail vessel of human hopes.

And third, any rational argument must acknowledge this. Her condescending prank phone calls, naturally, do not.

Essentially, her demands are sheer idiocy. Let me rephrase that: If she were as bright as she thinks she is, she'd know that she has gotten away with so much for so long that she's lost all sense of caution, all sense of limits. If you think about it, only a woman without any sense of limits could desire to confiscate other people's rightful earnings.

That's a very important point; Lleena's indifference only adds to the problem. Just look at the way that to believe that no one is smart enough to see through her transparent lies is to deceive ourselves. Lleena has endorsed the idea of crude militarism in a number of very specific ways, arguing, for instance, in favor of her hangers-on's decision to promote, foster, and institute alcoholism.

What conclusion should we draw from her positions? How about that this letter should be regarded as the beginning, not the end, of my stance against Lleena? Comments on the above are welcome, but please think them out first.

Ian this one's for you!!



Half of me was reluctant to write this letter, out of concern that Mr. I A N may be one of those people who say sinful things for the sole purpose of gaining attention. But given I's track record, I have concluded that until we focus on what unites rather than divides us, he will continue to manufacture and compile daunting lists of imaginary transgressions committed against him, so I've decided to proceed. Some background is in order: The space remaining in this letter will not suffice even to enumerate the ways in which he has tried to force us to bow down low before annoying slackers. His accomplices can be stereotyped as confused tools of prepackaged political ideology and self-serving pip-squeaks to boot. I've already explained why, but let me add that I feel no more personal hatred for him than I might feel for a herd of wild animals or a cluster of poisonous reptiles. One does not hate those whose souls can exude no spiritual warmth; one pities them. I think I've dished it out to Mr. I A N as best as I can in this letter. I hope you now understand why I say that we must not miss our chance to draw a picture of what we conceive of under the word "superserviceableness".


[This message was edited Thu Oct 3 13:33:07 PDT 2002 by CarrieLee]

yamomma said:

So true!

Moonbeam said:


Yes, I am guilty of this every single day. But I think it's a good thing.

Ok my complaint will be short and sweet, it is against both TRON and MOONBEAM. All I can say to the both of them...

PS that was some funny shit ya both wrote though

There is currently a lot of controversy about Prof. TwoTheNines Herm Aphrodite, Esq.'s words, and I know that any letter on the subject will almost certainly cause someone to pilfer the national treasure. Still, TwoTheNines is chomping at the bit for a chance to make us dependent on disagreeable, blockish survivalists for political representation, economic support, social position, and psychological approval. The following paragraphs are intended as an initial, open-ended sketch of how bad the current situation is. His fierce passions and fiendish cunning, combined with abnormal powers of intellect, with intense vitality, and with a persistency of purpose which the world has rarely seen, and whetted moreover by a keen thirst for blood engendered by defeat and subjection, combine to make TwoTheNines the deadly enemy of all mankind, while his twisted, pugnacious litanies contribute to inflame his wild lust of pelf, and to justify the crimes suggested by spite and superstition. We were put on this planet to be active, to struggle, and to suggest the kind of politics and policies that are needed to restore good sense to this important debate. We were not put here to wreck our country, derail our civilization, and threaten the human race with extinction, as TwoTheNines might think. Mawkish amnesiacs do not deserve the assistance they receive from society. Sad, but true. And it'll only get worse if he finds a way to impose lazy new restrictions on society just to satisfy some sort of overbearing drive for power.

If it weren't for militant slobs, TwoTheNines would have no friends. Even though supposedly distancing himself from vapid brazen-types, he has really not changed his spots at all. His objective is clear: to abet ethnic genocide, dictatorships, and brown-nosing New Age peddlers of snake-oil remedies before you know it. With this letter, I hope I have made my views clear: Prof. TwoTheNines Herm Aphrodite, Esq.'s cat's-paws are unruly at best, the downfall of society at worst.

Lleena said:

My goal for this letter is to create and nurture a true spirit of community. I shall do this in the only honest way that I can, which is by simply setting forth those principles that I personally believe in and that I personally observe and honor. To address this in a pedantic manner, in the rest of this letter, factual information will be prefaced as such and my own opinions will be clearly stated as opinions. For instance, it is decidedly a fact that all Rabbi Ian loves Pink Renner, Jr. really wants is to hang onto the perks he's getting from the system. That's all he really cares about.

I wouldn't even mention that his degeneracy has permeated the whole stratum of society if it weren't true. His philippics are designed to turn once-flourishing neighborhoods into zones of violence, decay, and moral disregard. And they're working; they're having the desired effect. In light of what I just stated, it's hard to avoid the conclusion that I must protest Ian's use of intemperate, savage slackers (also known as Ian's apostles) to empty the meaning of such concepts as "self," "justice," "freedom," and other profundities. What's my problem, then? Allow me to present it in the form of a question: Why do we put up with him? I mean, far too many people tolerate his convictions as long as they're presented in small, seemingly harmless doses. What these people fail to realize, however, is that I recently overheard a couple of unambitious weirdos say that black is white and night is day. Here, again, we encounter the blurred thinking that is characteristic of this Ian-induced era of slogans and propaganda.

Just because Ian and his thralls don't like being labelled as "feckless freeloaders" or "obtrusive kooks" doesn't mean the shoe doesn't fit. He can't help it; he just loves to make us dependent on testy loan sharks for political representation, economic support, social position, and psychological approval. Even if we accepted his ideals, so what? Does that mean that freedom must be abolished in order for people to be more secure and comfortable? Of course not. Perhaps Ian has never had to take a stand and fight for something as critical as our right to discuss the relationship between three converging and ever-growing factions -- filthy nitwits, self-absorbed, brain-damaged pickpockets, and diabolic clowns. But he wants to get me thrown in jail. He can't cite a specific statute that I've violated, but he does believe that there must be some statute. This tells me that the really interesting thing about all this is not that Ian should stop playing verbal games and tell us what he really means. The interesting thing is that if he wanted to, he could give rise to what I call (word removed as it is Rabbi Ian loves Pink Renner, Jr.'s most hated word, how sweet of me) hucksters. He could contaminate or cut off our cities' water supply. And he could abet a resurgence of caustic cameralism. We must not allow Ian to do any of these. This is far from all I have to say on the topic, but it's certainly enough for now. Just remember one thing: I am troubled by Rabbi Ian loves Pink Renner, Jr.'s constant exaggerations and half-truths.

I will not waste my time criticizing or insulting Diva as 1) she is unlikely to change, and 2) Diva probably revels in the letters of shock and repulsion that she regularly receives. Instead, I will focus on her irrational objectives, which, after all, are the things that spawn a society in which those with the most deviant lifestyle, vitriolic behavior, or personal failures are given the most by the government.

Be forewarned: I like to face facts. I like to look reality right in the eye and not pretend it's something else. And the reality of our present situation is this: Diva is locked into her present course of destruction. She does not have the interest or the will to change her fundamentally repressive politics. Only parasitic beggars ever claim that Diva's ideals are "grandly compelling", "articulate and persuasive", or "a vital contribution".

Well, that's getting away from my main topic, which is that she plans to leave a generation of people planted in the mud of a two-faced, empty-headed world, to begin a new life in the shadows of priggism.

She has instructed her allies not to discuss this or even admit to her plan's existence. Obviously, Diva knows she has something to hide. The only way out of Diva's rat maze is to keep our priorities in check. It's that simple.

If you are stimulated by new ideas, and if you can think for yourself rather than simply accept what Alf of Melmak dishes out, I think you will find this letter of interest.

In the text that follows, I won't bother discussing the flaws in Alf's logic, because he indubitably doesn't use any logic. I have a dream that my children will be able to live in a world filled with open spaces and beautiful wilderness -- not in a dark, uncontrollable world run by villainous mattoids. His factotums believe that all it takes to solve our social woes are shotgun marriages, heavy-handed divorce laws, and a return to some mythical 1950s Shangri-la.

Although it is perhaps impossible to change the perspective of those who have such beliefs, I wish nevertheless to begin a course of careful, planned, and coordinated action. There is one final irony to my story. Alf of Melmak has a vested interest in making me die in oppression, chaos, and despair.