Lothan said:

cough cough

Anyway...back to

I have basically been a single mother for twelve years. I stayed at home for a couple years and was bored off my ass. I did finish some college within those years though.

To each their own, I guess.

hokie1 said:

Awww...thanks for the kind words, hokie. His name is Miles and to me, he's the best little guy ever...even when he is being a little dink.

Most mothers do rock indeed.

veronikka said:

All 3 of my Sisters had to work because they were single Mothers. One of them though had been married and had to divorce due to her husband being well, you know....anyhow, I always vowed that when I got married and started a family I would stay home with my child or children until they were school age. It worked fine for the first year and then I had no choice but to go back to work. Needless to say I cried my eyes out the first time I had to drop my Daughter off at daycare. I have wished that still to this very day I would have been able to stay home instead of having to go back to work but our situation called for needing the extra income.

I would recommend to any new Mother or just Moms period if you can swing it do it but if you cannot due to your situation be sure to spend quality time with your child no matter how tired you are. Children are the best gifts we could ever recieve, treat them like gold but don't spoil them.

veronikka said:

Co-sign

My opinion on that remark(by Buthersdog) is this:

NO MAN TELLS ME WHAT TO DO!He'd be kissing the floor IF he told me that. WHERE in the rule book and WHAT rule book, does it say the woman HAS to cook the food for man especialy if SHE was the one bringing home the money?

I made more then my ex husband, he told me that one time and I turned, looked and laughed my rear end off

(I left him there to cook his own meal and I was on my way to work.)

I was on both sides of the fence, I was a stay at home mom, now I am a working single mom.

There are pro and cons for both sides IMHO. Here are some pros and cons I saw or seen while doing both:

Stay at home:
Pro-Got to stay at home with my daughter and spend time with her during the young part of her life. Teaching her many things amongst tieing her shoes, write her name, etc., keeping the house in a orderly fashion and fixing meals.

Cons-Being around my child all day long does get to some especially when she cried ALL DAY LONG for no reason( and some have to admit it is good to have "mommy time" without the child around), I was missing GOING to work earning a paycheck. Leaving the child at a sitter while going to work was tough trying to find a good sitter at the time.


Working Moms(single/married):
Pro-Earning a paycheck, paying bills, taking care of the childs needs, getting out of the home(even if its for work the majority of the time), knowing there is life outside a childs world(not in a bad way),teaching that it is okay to work outside the home.

Cons- Tired after working, missing your childs school programs on scheduled night at work, not being home with her/him, leaving them when sick(if a sitter or relative can sit with them while you work).

I work full time 12 hour shifts(7p-7a) and a single mother. I have also found that I CAN keep a clean home doing both things and with school in session( I help my daughter with her homework when needed, she gets straight A's and on honor roll).

Its whats most comfortable for the mothers in the situation and whatever them and the spouses decide. So I dont want to take sides in this either.

BOTH sides work hard no matter how each side puts it!

TotalANXiousNESS said:

Yeah women's lib was sooo stupid

I think that a woman will need to have some sort of form of income to still hang onto her sense of self. You don't have work full time, but maybe less. I would never want to feel like my money is at the mercy of my husband. That's just me.

I have a stay at home mom friend that wishes she would have done it different...stayed in college and work before popping out babies. To each his own.

hokie1 said:

That is either naive or willfully ignorant logic! Do you have an opinion about situations you haven't encountered yet? I bet you do and hopefully your opinion is reasonable and unconditional.

KatSkrizzle said:

Yesm, thank you. I would never personally stay at home because it would leave me extremely vulnerable financially, and that, to me, is just not being a very responsible parent. Sorry guys.

JustErin said:

Your welcome Erin.

greenpixies said:

Yeah, you're right. You can have an opinion, however my point was that if you haven't encountered something you can't truly understand it or know how you will handle it. The thing with kids is that there is no rule book, no guide book, nothing to tell you what to do. Don't be offended. I'm sorry if you were. I didn't mean it to come across in an ugly way. I just know for myself I had all these grand ideas of how things were going to go and then, wow....Most mothers I know will tell you the same thing.

It's just not Christian, and could possibly be unAmerican!

hokie1 said:

let me answer for GP- your guide book is the bible.

evenstar3 said:

greenpixies said:

You are hysterical.

Lothan said:

Imago said:

You so damn stupid!

I worked when i had my two childen after youngest child was six i quit it was hard i work night an weekend i never got to spend no time i wasn't there when they need me.I was the only one that work around the house to.It was hard jest keep up.

ZombieKitten said:

I don't know what's funnier - the statement itself or the fact that I'm apparently the ONLY one who found it funny

I have so much more respect for moms who are working and making money for the family. The 50's are over. If she's working at home and has her own business, that's great too, I know many like that as well. I think it's so important for women to get educated and support themselves, cause if it doesn't work out with their partner and they rely on the breadwinner's income, they'll be screwed after. I say this, because when my parents split up, my mom had already had an established career for 15 years and even got promoted to a full time job with better pay and benefits, so now she works from 8 to 4 and still has time to be a mom. If she wasn't pushed and encouraged to finish college and get her diploma back in the day, things wouldn't have turned out the way they have, which is why I'm such a liberal feminist when it comes to talking about women's roles in society.
[Edited 8/17/07 9:38am]

CalhounSq said:

oh my god. I didn't even see that.

I don't want ot sell my kids. But I'd give them away.

Lothan said:

CalhounSq said:

damn i didn't see this either i feel like that to on occasion to anybody who says they dont is lying

heybaby said:

I feel like that & I don't even HAVE kids

CalhounSq said:

you want to buy them?

CalhounSq said:

I've tried ebay but all I get is replies from people that want to trade

One4All4Ever said:

you have to market the twins right! don't say "double trouble" even though it's catchy

Well for me, being at home was not an option. Even if it was I would not do it. I like working and I feel like I gave up and sacrificed so much for this child why should I give up that too?

My main problem with a lot of stay at home moms is their insulting attitude that they are better moms because they're home all day. I just don't like the uppity vibe I get from them. My kid deserves a mother that is a nurturer, a provider, a warrior and a disciplinarian. Moms who work away from home and moms who stay at home can do that. Neither one is more successful at parenting than the other.

As long as my son feels loved and is happy then I am a successful mom.

ZombieKitten said:

well ... maybe I'll hire u to make some cute pics of them
now I come to think of it ... I might actually market them as twinz here
on the marketplace

ZombieKitten said:

"them"??!! I don't even wanna buy ONE!!