Let's just say that Superman, Batman, Aquaman, Robin, The Flash, Wolverine, Cyclops and Spiderman had a gay superhero orgy... and that this gay orgy was set up as a fuck tournament... who would win if the battle was to see who could go the longest? Each round of the tournament is a best 3 out of 5 competition.

What would their special moves be?
Who would be the MVP?
What technique would each use as a finishing move?

Dude, do you have a job?

WillieThePimp said:

Yes, do you?

"The Flash" wouldn't last at all...it's all in the name!

My choice 4 endurance: Superman... afterall, he is the "man of steel".

That would depend what Batman was packing today in his Bat Belt.
"Holy Orgies, Robin. Thank God I brought my...

We need the female version of this battle too... but I can only think of Supergirl, Wonderwoman and Batgirl and Storm...

What other female superhero-types are there?

PS: I always had a thing for Lynda Carter as Wonderwoman when I was a kid... Grrrowl.

http://members.tripod.com.../ww_08.jpg

Damn it... tripod annoys me... Click the link above
[This message was edited Tue Oct 1 10:05:03 PDT 2002 by IceNine]

IceNine said:


Fuck yeah! me too!

In answer to your question...I can't say for sure. It's just a hunch but I'll place my bets on the one-eyed beast.

Good thing you didn't enter me in this contest. I'd beat em all with my superstrong mouth

TRON said:

Me too! Except I didn't want to "do" her, I wanted to "be" her!

I'm thinking...

Superman would have the strongest cock and would be able to withstand Wolverine's butt clenching muscles.

Whereas Batman is smarter and would go after Robin-for old time's sake--while studying the others for weaknesses.

Aquaman would be able to hold his breath the longest Spiderman so can wrap the phone cord around his neck and let it loose just as Aquaman jizzes.

Robin will eventually end up as the cracker in a superhero circle jerk, The Flash the quickest to come, and Cyclops, the last, having to eat the cracker.

The Flash is too quick to bugger them, and they collectively kick his ass for not giving them any foreplay. "That bastard" Superman says "He could at least grease me up before he bends me over..."

Wolverine is too manly to be involved in such homo rivally, so he dresses up Robin as his prison ho and butters his green thong and anally raping the Boy Wonder.

MVP: The Flash...most tournament buggers.
Superman will get the almost get the nod for most anal victories--if Batman hadn't whipped out that kryptonite vibrator which brought Supe to his wobbly knees. "No Batman, not the green one...you're so good to me"
"Yep." Batman in 5.

this reminded me of that episode of "The Drew Carey Show".

Did anyone see it with the gay couple living with Drew. It was the old, original batman and robin.


Remember the line?
To the batcave!

mrchristian said:

:LOL:

Funny stuff!

I forgot to add the invisible man in there... he could have really fucked shit up!

IceNine said:

And Wonder Woman in her invisible jet--which duhh, never made her invisible!!(i stole that from some comedy show).

Wolverine would go the longest. His superpowers are based on stamina and a healing factor. His energy and fluids would replenish themselves naturally. He's "the best at what he does." He's a fuck-machine!

AaronForever said:

I think you're right...Batman would know how to outsmart Superman but Wolverine would outlast them both in a butt-fuckfest. Although i've seen Flash run around the world a few hundred times. I've only done it once, very tiring.

Round one:

Superman vs. Batman


Aquaman vs. Robin


The Flash vs. Wolverine


Cyclops vs. Spiderman


...
[This message was edited Tue Oct 1 13:36:20 PDT 2002 by IceNine]

IceNine said:

This could've been a good DC vs Marvel thread too. This is double elimination right?

BTW, did anyone catch the Sopranos last night with Ralphie and Tony's sister in bed??! "You're my slut, are you ready to be pimped out?!" I was laughing my ass off.

IceNine said:

Wasn't there an X-Men chick named Rogue?

BattierBeMyDaddy said:

Rogue
those chicks on that new Birds of Prey show (dunno who they are... Huntress, maybe? don't read the comic either)
Catwoman
Scarlet Witch
Invisible Woman
erm...

Gooey is too busy daydreaming about that orange brick guy from The Fantastic Four...
Thing?

He the man.

Round two:

Superman vs. Aquaman
Wolverine vs. Cyclops

and there have been some new entries to the tournament:

The Thing vs. The Silver Surfer
The Phantom vs. The Human Torch
Captain America vs. The Sub-Mariner
Plastic Man vs. Mr. Fantastic

The Green Lantern is now an alternate

...
[This message was edited Wed Oct 2 7:39:55 PDT 2002 by IceNine]

IceNine said:

Sorry, but maybe you should leave it to my filthy mind, okay?

It should be (obviously)

The Thing vs. The Silver Surfer

For the sex of it, okay?

IceNine said:

Superman takes Aquaman to a bistro and follows him into the bathroom only to find out Aquaman has jumped into the toilet--his strength is twice that of Superman's... and so is his breath. In a french kiss Aquaman would only land on a dolphin in heat, he tongue chokes Supe into submission and into doing the backdoor boogie. Aquaboogie in 4.

gooeythehamster said:

Okay...

Changed!

Oh my god!

EVIL VILLAINS HAVE CRASHED THE TOURNAMENT!

Dr. Doom
The Kingpin
Magneto
The Joker
Lex Luthor
The Penguin
The Riddler
Brainiac
Galactus

IceNine said:

Sounds like the good guys are going to get they're 'asses handed to them'!!
I can just picture the Joker "Ok, let's have some action, i want some asses wigglin', i want some perfection! Batman, down in front!"

BTW, there's an episode of Batman (60's version) where one of the female villians kidnap Robin and then don Robin's outfit to fool Batman--but they use actor Burt Ward playing the girl, playing Robin. Hands turned out, curtsying, talking very effeminate...same green tights. Classic moment!

Surely all these Superheroes would be too busy comparing outfits and bitching about the female Superheroes to be bothered to have a fuck tournament.