After years of giving thoughts about it i know i don't wanna have children & that, unless it just "happens", i won't.

I love children, i'm very close 2 my godson & having him in my life is a gift from Shiva, but i don't wanna have my own children. It's just that, well, i don't think it would fit, i'm 2 much of a loner.

Most of the times when i say that, people react like i'm a freak or say that i'll have children ANYWAY

Cannot a human being b normal while not wanting children?
[Edited 7/27/07 11:26am]

shaomi said:

i have 2 bad ass nieces, a bad ass nephew, and two bad ass dogs. that's all the bad ass behavior i need for the next10 years. i prefer to keep my money and spend it important things like video games and dvd's
[Edited 7/27/07 11:29am]

Fury said:

..or sessy women..

illicitkisses said:

absolutely

shaomi said:

There's nothing wrong with you - you're smart enough to realize that lifestyle's not for you. There are too many folks having kids who shouldn't. Parenting is no joke - it's hard work, 24/7, 365 days a year for at least 20 years. You're being honest with yourself. F--k the haters - they've been brainwashed by society's "rules" anyway.

I love my brother's kids, but I never regretted my decision to remain single & childless. I live my life like Fury. Unfortunately, in America, single women get more flack than single men.

Most people say "I understand completely!!" I think they wonder about my girlfriend more, though. Why would a woman not want kids? there must be something wrong!

Some people suggest that I'd be a good father, and I say I know, but I don't want that responsibility.

No one bothers me.
I occasiaonally get comments from my extended family about my "missing" boyfriend at family events ( ), but other family members sometimes even come to my defense, noting my one single aunt who never married or had children was more "successful", more well-traveled, etc. than the rest of them.

I really love children. I am a pround aunt of a nephew and a niece and every summer my niece is spending some weeks with me and my boyfriend and I enjoy that time a lot. But I don't want children on my own, I never have and it is rather unlikely that I will ever have children, although you never know what changes in you life may happen.

I don't want no little bad ass brats and it really doesn't surprise anyone because I'm gay. I know a lot of gay people who wish they could have kids and I tell them all the time that they don't know how lucky they are that they can't have them. Hell, I know straight people that wish they could give their's away.

While I have tree beautiful daughters and I would not trade that for anything, I do not think it is strange for someone else not to want kids.

It is a big responsibility and is not for everyone. It all about personal choices and what is right for you and your own personal situation.

IMHO the same thing applies to marriage, it is not for everybody and that is OK.

Don't get married just because that is what society or friends and family "think" you should do. Do not have kids just because that is what society or friends and family "think" you should do.

If you are going to have kids and/or get married, do it because you know it is right for you and your situation and you truly want to.

No, it's not crazy or strange. I admire people more when they don't want the responsibility and have the maturity and courage to say so. I think many times people think once you reach a certain age you should get married. And, many times people think that having children is just the next logical step. I definitely think sometimes peoples' parents can put pressure on a child to give them a grandchild. I say to each their own. I have two awesome sons and am glad to be a mother, but it's not for everyone and it would be nice if people would respect each other's choices. It's such a personal and private decision.

I love kids, I want 100s. I want to fuck like a rabbit and produce many.

CarrieMpls said:

I was childless for 30 years and didn't plan on having any either. No one bothered me about it, nor do I think anyone around me even cared whatsoever.

But man, when I got prego was my mom ever fucking happy about it.

shaomi said:

When I interviewed for my current job a few years ago the dr that owned the company asked me if I had any kids. I said "No", she then asked me if I had plans to have them in the near future (which is a big for the state of Florida EOE), I said "No, I have no plans on ever having any- never wanted them in my 33 yrs on earth so far". She then jumped out of her chair got in my face and said " WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?". I was taken a back for a moment and did not know what to say. I guess part of it was that I was married at the time and I guess ppl assume? I have talked to her about it since then and realise where her reaction was coming from but at the time I felt very offended by her comment.

They are happy that I have since changed my mind and I have learned to never say never...we shall see.

JustErin said:

My mother would never express it to me in any way, but I think she really wishes I would. I think she'd jump for joy over the moon fantastic if I got pregnant now. Even as a single mother.

I think women get more shit for not wanting children than men do, because our society raises girls from before they can walk or talk to want nothing more in life than to be a wife and mommy. As enlightened as we like to think we are, we're not really. Take a look down the aisles of the toy store. What's most of the girls' section consist of? Baby dolls and toy cleaning sets.

There's nothing wrong with being a wife or mother obviously -if that's what you want to do. But training girls from birth to want; to need to be a baby-machine? That's sick IMO.




Personally, I do want kids. But good God, not anytime soon. I'm only 22, highly irresponsible, and just about to start college. Getting knocked up is the last thing I need. Maybe when sshool's done and I've secured a proper job I'll think about it, but no sooner.

Even so, I've gotten all kinds of people weirded out because I don't coo and fawn over babies when I see them. I don't dislike kids, but really -babies are just small, fragile people. It's not necessary to act like a ninny in the presence of one.

Try this attitude:

fuck 'em.

it's your life sweetie, not anyone else's

I think if I admit I really don't want kids I will be treated like a freak all right

yeah some kids are mentally messed up. (bad as hell) but I might want 1 or 2 that's it.....if you do decide to have one, don't have one at 50 or older.

JustErin said:

I'm curious Erin...Even though you didn't want or plan on having children how did you feel when you learned you were pregnant and how do you feel about being a mom now? I saw photos of your little guy and he is so cute.

i'm female and dont want kids neither does my fella thank goodness, i have nieces and nephews and a beautiful goddaughter who i see once or twice a year and that suits me fine.i experienced the first 6 weeks of pregnancy once morning sickness that lasted all day (no one tells u that can happen)itchy legs,and a dislike of alcohol!!never again..6 weeks of my life wasted!gratefully back on the booze and have the time and money to see prince this summer!

hokie1 said:

I was mortified when I first found out. I planned to terminate to be honest but when I went to see my doctor about it he told me to go home and think about it a little longer. I did and soon decided that I couldn't go through with an abortion.

I love being a mom. It's seriously the best thing that has ever happened to me.

I dont want children. Its possible I might change my mind in the future.

But yes people think Im crazy for not wanting to produce. "Dont you want a mini you??!!!"
They assume I hate children. I do not hate children. Children love me for some reason and they always clinge to me.

My mom was shocked when I told her I didnt want any. I told her,just because Im capable doesnt mean I HAVE to
A friend of mine says he wants more children,I asked him why he said "I dont know" Now,thats odd to me. You want something but you dont know why?

My fiance's sister and her daughter came to visit us and I observed them.She looked at her daughter with so much love in her eyes. She said its sad,because we would make perfect parents and that we should change our minds.
When her daughter threw several temper tantrums,my decision was set in stone.

I dont think I'd be a good mother anyway. I wouldnt have the time and you cant tell a child... "I need some space-can u get lost for a few days?"

ZombieKitten said:

no. not at all baby, not at all

I feel less alone, thanx guys

JustErin said:

That's cool. Having my 2 sons is the most wonderful thing I've ever done. It is so fun sometimes, but other times, not so much so! It really is such hard work. But, kids can be so funny at times. They provide such comedic entertainment. When they cuddle up to you and just love on you it is the best feeling. If it weren't for the snuggling and laughter it would totally not be worth it.

I didn't really like kids when I was a kid and not much has changed.

ThreadCula said:

ThreadCula is a woman? U a woman? Oh lawd i always assumed u were a guy

I would love to have one or two daughters in my late 30's or early 40's, but certainly NOT in my 20's or my early 30's...

shaomi said:

Yeah I'm a woman.

U're not the first. I think my avie makes people think I'm a dude.