Hello all...now some of you may not have had the unfortunte pleasure of being irritated by the idiot trap we call Walmart, but for me and thousands of others its low prices are a sirens call we cannot afford to avoid.

I have one of the more ghetto Walmarts by my house and I feel the need to try and inform others who may shop at Walmart some simple etiquette
that will make the shopping experience better for everyone....Let us begin....

1. If your ass is fatter than the width of the shopping cart you are pushing you should not stop in the middle of the isle. Please herd your fat ass to the side as much as possible so we can get to the green beans...Thanks.

2. If your kids are wild and untamed monsters at home please do not bring them to the store. I refrain the right to beat your wild children without mercy like Mel Gibson did to those kids in Mad Max beyond Thunderdome.....Thanks.

3. If you smell like liquor, ass, feet, shit, piss or any other foul odor please go to Target...Thanks.

4. If scanning your own groceries seem to be to complicated and complex I suggest you go into a regular checkout line...that way you have time to fling your poo at people and rub you ass across the ground while you wait instead of being confused...Thanks.

5. Please wear a bra ladies...and men please make sure your nuts are not hanging out of your shorts...Thanks.

6. Try not to bring your whole village of children to the store all at once if you can avoid it. Or if you can have them walk single file in the store...or better yet stop fucking so much....thanks.


If people would follow these and other helpful tips I think the world and the economy not to mention world hunger would all be improved. Thanks.

Funny, but I guess 90% of american orgers shop at Walmart.

MissMe said:

I doubt it's that high.

MissMe said:

Walmart sucks! I Target!

fling your poo

Brilliant.

Sinister said:

X 10 Whenever I have to go there....you better believe I use the self check out.

better yet, keep shopping and shop for these items

1. Dexatrim
2. Valium
3. Deodorant
4. Ginsing
5. Undergarments Dept
6. Condoms

Sinister said:

I HATE WalMArt. Just for those reasons. It's full of screaming bad ass kids, the clilentele is a little...and for all the reasons above. I HATE Walmart. THis is why I shop at Target. It's usually void of if not significantly reduced of the Section 8 crowd

And please do not think this post is anti-poor people or anything like that (im poor!) It's that regardless of stature people should know how to act.

There is no reason for people to turn Walmarts into the DMV but with food and clothes.

all ignorant poor folk be up in walmart.

Sinister said:

U did a thread about this before.... please come up with some new material ty

See, the trick is to be at Wal-Mart when it opens...
U KNOW the crowd U describe is not out of bed yet! I'm in & out before they even get up!
I eat a lot of cereal, and it's a HELL of lot cheaper at Wal-Mart, but I cannot brave those conditions for some Special K!
(and NEVER on a Sunday! )

I would just like to add FUCK wal mart. Sam's club can suck a fart out of my ass as well.

I stock overnight at the Mart now.



There is a man who comes in each and every night in the store I work in with short, short, short jogging shorts on. He is an older fellow and his balls sag right out. I know that motherfucker feels the breeze. Why no one has kicked him out yet I can't imagine. Management thinks it's a big joke that we all have to see this old motherfucker's nuts every night.

Guess he's getting his fucking kicks. Bastard.

purplekisses said:

Actually that thread was about a particular time I went to Walmart so hush!


And that thread was centered around going there at midnight and feeling like I was that girl in the Thriller video cause of all the crackheads....

Oh, and I love how every young kid's a "bad ass" when he comes into Walmart after like, 9 PM. It's like, bitch, please.

CortestheKiller said:

See this is a universal walmart thing cause nuts hanging out shorts are a daily occurance at my Walmart...Also tits that no bra dare touch bouncing off some ladies knees....and the ever SEXY fat lady wearing a size 2 outfit...

CortestheKiller said:

Ahh yes the GSG's "Grocery Store Gangstas" they like ice grill you in the frozen section and pop collars in 5 tees for 5 dollars section.

chocolate1 said:

See my Walmart is 24 hours and after 11pm is prime crackhead hours...Chicks out in the parking lot selling tamales at like 1am...talking about I need gas for my car that's why im selling these tamales...

at 1am...

in a fucking Walmart parking lot...

after I just seen you hop of a bike....

yeah...

Sinister said:

OK...the nuts element made me think of this

http://www.youtube.com/wa...sSgaWAMS8E

Sinister said:

Neigh!!!

Sinister said:

Oh my god....you are lyin'.

CortestheKiller said:

He needs the nut bra..

http://www.youtube.com/wa...sSgaWAMS8E

do your targets sell food over there?

ZombieKitten said:

yes

ThreadCula said:

!!!!!

ZombieKitten said:

yep,they're called Super Targets

ThreadCula said:

we have normal Targets and Country Targets which have about 1/4 of the usual merchandise