.....How about we, across the ORG planet, come clean and reveal the secret we sometimes keep even from ourselves....that thing that causes you to cringe....?

It's weird because I was thinking about this last night as I pondered the sum of all the dirty shit I've done in 40+ years of life....what have I done that causes me to just .....


....for me, in retrospect, the number of times that I slept around when my marriage was in its infancy is that thing....its amazing I'm still married....or worse, that I didn't wake up with a gun sticking in my face.....or a knife sticking out of my chest.....

next.....

The thing that makes me cringe is thinking about how I treated my mother sometimes when she was alive. I mean, this was me being a spoiled brat teenager. Those things make me crazy when I think about it. At least I wasn't as bad as those girls on MY SWEET SIXTEEN.


M

MIGUELGOMEZ said:

I know that regret.

MIGUELGOMEZ said:

I'll probably feel that regret....my parents divorced when I was very young, and she left without so much as a kiss on the forehead...my feelings towards my mom have ranged from white-hot intense hatred to severe indifference....but when she dies, I know that I'm still gonna feel like crap because I've had several opportunities to rebuild the bridge, but I'm too stubborn....

...the thought equally makes me and

my total indifference to my grandfather while he was alive. he died when i was twelve, and was a virtual stranger to me. it never occurred to me to get close to him and i don't think i'll ever get over regretting it.

evenstar3 said:

Just as long as you remember that these mistakes are human. Children cannot be considered to be insightful or thinking about the how short a lifespan is.

Just make sure that you do your best to engage the people you wanna be close to NOW...

I am sure that your grandfather and Miguel's mom and mine are all in our hearts and in this way you are closer than skin. And that's what counts.

I have 3 regrets in life....

1) Working my ass off and being so serious at such a young age (finished a B.A. and masters by 25, career by 23, That I feel like I have almost regressed maturity wise to where I am traveling and partying and in a bunch of non committed relationships instead of getting that all out of my system in my early 20's.

2) Not being married. I hate the fact that I have not found the one yet. The last of my 5 best friends got married 2 weeks ago and I am the last of the Mohicans. I know i should not do it just cause my friends are, but I do want to be a father and family man more than anything on earth. I feel like I am running out of time.

3) I love it here, absolutely do. Have met some great folks. But over the past 6 months, I have spent so much time on here instead of getting out more, which may be one of the reasons why regret #2 and posssibly #1 is happening. This is a place I love but I need to cut back my hours here!

karmatornado said:

We love you too

I know what you mean about cutting the hours back. I made myself log off last night early and not return til morning.
Don't feel bad about not finding your one yet...you will- you deserve a special lady and you will find each other- usually where least expected.

karmatornado said:

Don't settle for less, please. Find a woman you feel comfortable with doing that, don't go look for a woman to do just that for you.

HamsterHuey said:

Amen.....I agree!
Don't fuck up like I have done before and settle because I did not think what I wanted and needed was out there.
Please take it from me- you deserve to wait and find what you are looking for- her heart, body, mind and soul- all of it.
Not just nice legs & booty

Take it from me- I am old!

shanti0608 said:

Thanks Herman and Val. U 2 are good folk! Its just irritating. I have a great family and all that good stuff. I am blessed with my good health and opportunities that were provided by my parents and God's good fortune, but its just those few things I have listed have just been lingering for a few years like a black cloud.

karmatornado said:

My biggest regret is that you are not gay.



Meanie.

karmatornado said:

I feel ya! I really do

Be glad for your great family though. I am virtually alone- my mom just moved away and she was really my only family. She is happy now though so it is all good.
Time for me to be happy as well.

HamsterHuey said:

True...very true....

Don't rush it....when you find the one, there's no denying the feeling....

shanti0608 said:

You're not old.....you're seasoned.....and I'm certain that you're not as seasoned as I am.....

reneGade20 said:

Oh seasoned sounds better...I like it hot and spicy with a touch of sweetness..

You might me surprised how seasoned I am

shanti0608 said:

Well dear Shanti, even if you are, you're probably still turning heads a plenty....

....besides, I'm partial to the seasoned types....hot, skilled AND good conversationalists.....

reneGade20 said:

well you have good taste then...

Thanks for your compliments

Hehehe I had a dream last night that I flew over there and stood up on a big platform and told all of you that we were going home. I had a big aircraft behind me
Then after my speech I got to bring you up on the platform with me and I brought out your entire family from the plane- they were there to fly home with you.

I have been having some sleep issues lately- can you tell.

shanti0608 said:

I have a similar dream every night.....just over 117 days left.....


[Edited 7/8/07 10:31am]

HamsterHuey said:

very good points, & i'm trying to. thanks.

HamsterHuey said:

Yes, totally. I think my mom and I are okay now. Big org

M

MIGUELGOMEZ said:

I think we all put our parents or parent (mom in my case) through some hell in the teen years.
My mom was very controlling and strict taking on the role of mom and dad when I was 12. We hit a rough patch when I was about 16-17 I would say. I am sure she has a few gray hairs due to me.

All the things that I’ve done that makes or made me cringe is a series of things that has played out in my life. The most notorious, telling and lesson learned was when I was with my bf/fiancé we were together many years ago for right at 10 yrs. (this is when I was 17-25 yrs old). I was in love and wanted to be with someone else who was in my life well before he and I met, it is from this experience that I learned the difference between loving and being in love. I tell people I should be dead for all the selfish and somewhat cowardly shit that I did when we were together, all to make him leave or end our relationship instead of me just stepping up and ending it myself because I did loved him and didn’t want to hurt him (like the shit I was doing wasn’t). Things came front and center for us in the end that our problems were us and things about us together that weren’t working and though we tried, I finally ended it because he never would have which honestly concerned me more though he threatened to do so many times. I regret and cringe at ALL that I did to him which has come back to meet me again for payment due and it took a long time for me to be able to look myself in mirror after that… I’ve never behaved that way since. What makes me cringe the most is that I didn’t do something about this in the beginning when I knew we weren’t happy and it wasn’t going to fix itself and I didn’t do enough ironically to let the other one (the one I was in love with) know that it was him that I wanted to be with. My ex is happily married from what I’m told, much happier than he would’ve been if we’d stayed together and the ONE that I was in love with is, also happily married as well...to someone else.
[Edited 7/8/07 20:20pm]