JustErin said:

Have you ever noticed that people into porn cannot sustain relationships?

That's because they've cheapened the one thing that should be the superglue of a relationship.

Imago said:

If you think sex is something that can be performed for reasons other than love, then I think you'll have a hard time having a fulfilling sexual relationship with someone you love.

RodeoSchro said:

Have you ever noticed that the majority of people (porn or no porn) on this planet can not sustain relationships?

I enjoy porn and it's never, ever gotten in the way of my relationships. It's never even been a slight issue.

RodeoSchro said:

1) It can be
2) You may be right about the latter though



Sex is a primal impulse. I think love is more complicated. Some folks seek fulfillment in incorporating the sex into an act of love. Some people distinguish between the two as they see fit.


Porn is not meant to portray "Relationship" and the acts that accompany it. There's nothing in porn that indicates the persons performing the sexual acts actually care for and nurture each other. It's just a wild fuckfest. Entertainment.

I see nothing particularly wrong with it. I just think, like many things, it can take up too much of a person's time cause it's so easily accessible now, and the stigma of it is quickly melting away. It will become caffeine.

RodeoSchro said:

I think thinking sex is the superglue that holds together a relationship would be what cheapens the relationship.
An integral part? sure. But if that's what's holding you together, you're not gonna make it.

CarrieMpls said:

Oh yes.

SOmetimes, I wish in some of my past relationships that we could just "sit" and listen to each other. Just listen and hear. To me that would have trumped anything sexual we ever did.

Imago said:

I can't tell if you're making fun or if you're serious.

CarrieMpls said:

I'm serious!

My relationships never fizzle becuase of the sexual aspect. Honey, I'm a fucking dynamo and shit.


But the pattern I've noticed is that it fizzles because there's this weird disconnect. We stop listening, talking, and sharing. We seperate.. in the same fucking bed. It's like waking up each morning and feeling less and less connected.

It's hard to explain, but just "listening" would have solved alot.

CarrieMpls said:

To me, long term relationships are based on companionship, that's where the love comes in. Sex is just a bonus. In my world, sex is not love and love is not sex. Like Dan said, it's primal impulse.

I've been in love with men and had sex with them and I have not been in love with men and had sex with them. The sex was no different.

JustErin said:

It all goes back to love, and three words you never hear in porn are "I love you".

JustErin said:

Sex IS love in my world. It wasn't always that way. I know which way has made me happy.

I love it!


M

MIGUELGOMEZ said:

You are a very bad person.



call me

ADDICTED.

Imago said:

aaaahhhhh...
yeah.

I don't know who I am to talk, I haven't been able to make a relationship last more than a few months in the last 10 years, but other than one exception I was fine with letting go. Most of them just fizzled and drifted and that was that. But the one thing I have to have is open communication. If I can't talk and feel heard and have a chance to listen I know I need to drift along. For me, if it's just sex I don't even let them in that far. And I have no expectations beyond it.

RodeoSchro said:

And that's great if that's what works for you. But not everyone is the same in that regard, that's all.

Imago said:

And if you're lucky I may give you my QPEEPS.COM name.....

m

RodeoSchro said:

Very good, that's great to hear but what works for you doesn't mean it works for others.

I know which way has made me very happy as well.

CarrieMpls said:

I understand, but love is universal. I would challenge people to try it my way (drop the porn) and see if they feel better about themselves.

If they don't, they can always go back to porn.

JustErin said:

I don't know you well enough to know if you are happy, but I hope you are.

RodeoSchro said:

Cool.

Did that. Watched porn for years, then stopped for a couple (just wasn't interested or had the time for it) then started up again. Nothing emotionally changed in me. Didn't feel better about myself, didn't feel worse.

Ottensen said:

ok...c'mere....uh.....yeah...well....shhhh. (lookin' around)..but uh....but in my freak momma days...I was probably one thong and some clear stilettos away from being a stripper....but shhhhh....don't tell nobody.


I'm a good girl now...

smoking porn

Stax said:

I learned it just now!

Imago said:

Nah, takes only like 10 minutes or so.

Hey, I like his chick
I love how ya'll are getting physiosocialogiclical on a porn thread...
..and shouldn't NSFW be added in the thread title?
[Edited 6/22/07 10:04am]

RodeoSchro said:

Way to generalize there, buddy I'm into teh pr0n and I would be able to sustain a relationship IF I was in one, but since I'm not at the moment, a little self nookie ain't never hurt nobody.

RodeoSchro said:

seriously? maybe if by 'into porn' you mean addicted, but everyone who watches it?

evenstar3 said:

From what I have seen, people who are in sustained relationships seem to be the ones watching the most porn because they are actually getting sex the least.
[Edited 6/22/07 11:46am]

JustErin said:

really! there are so many other things that can make a relationship fail, and occasional porn viewing really doesn't have the significance people think it does.