Another chapter from the "This is why I hate dating" diaries....LOL!!

I have been seeing a young lady four months here in Atlanta and while we are not boyfriend/girlfriend....WE ARE DATING AND SEEING NOONE ELSE as we BOTH have stated to each other.

So I go to a BBQ for her 30th birthday yesterday and these are all HER friends and relatives right. I show up give her a generic hug and fix a plate. I am amongst a plethora of people I don't know and she expends absolutely no energy in introducing me to the masses. While I am a highly social person and can always navigate a crowd, but these circumstances call for some common courtesy and hospitality in just introducing me to folks right? She doesn't have to use a bullhorn and tell people that this is the guy I am dating, just introduce me as a friend.....right?

She chose to not only NOT introduce me, but leave me on my own accord period! Stopping by when she noticed I was a bit upset at her actions or lack thereof. So I finished my food and left.

I came back to retrieve my contributions to the day and she introduces me to a friend of hers saying how she was mad because SHE was rude and I agreed! And just walked away!

What is your take on her actions?

maybe she was overwhelmed by the party and all the hoopla that goes with it.

talk to her and try to work it out. good luck.

Strange ...

If I was dating you
had been for four months

There is no way in hell I would not hang with you introduce you



it's really quite strange

have you asked her ?

Fuck her off! rude, simple and plain.

Talk to her and ask her what's up with that but my take is that there where others there that may have been in the same boat as you. I say that because in situations like that i.e. her birthday party with her family and friends you would have/should have been introduced as a friend at the very least if as nothing else. Also, I find it interesting that no one inquired or asked who you were and how you know her especially here in the South, we are nosey...we want to know who everybody is at a party like that if for no other reason but to find out if they're available and can hook up with a single man for themselves.

I think she should of introduced you to people. What is she hiding?

How you were treated may be an indication of how she feels about you.

Rude and no home training

Mach said:

I gotta co-sign with you Mach

My first thought was maybe she was wrapped up in the fact that it was a party for her birthday and wasn't thinking about being a good hostess/friend/girlfriend.

If you are not happy with the way she is acting, end it.

Where you wearing any pants?

Sometimes,
at functions like these,
if you aren't,
it can make it awkward for friends let alone girlfriends to want to introduce you to others.

I found this out the "hard" way.

Illustrator said:

Maybe it wasn't "awkward". Maybe they were just afraid of losing an eye.

Nothinbutjoy said:

It felt a bit awkward when a few of the guests formed a line behind me, each of 'em holding a empty bun in their hand.
I was like "wtf?".

Illustrator said:

Ahhhhh awkward for YOU then, 'cause it seems like they were very comfortable trying to get their grub on.

DexMSR said:

Seems to me she went out of her way to appear not to be attached to you for some reason. Did she have any other "friends" there?

I think it just lacks common curteousy to not introduce you if sghe *knows* you don't know anyone there, whether you be a friend/boyfriend/whatever...

weird

Gretchie

JustErin said:

I thought you HAD ended it!!! Point the finger at the real issue. Face it, she's just not that into you and you two are not good for each other. Cut the losses and move on. Being friends may not be possible. If you keep participating you are just as guilty as she is.

I think she had could introduce you to her friends and family. The way had could been easy, as you have been the coocke that evening.
Maybe she felt unsure or she did not think about, if it is important or not for you and the guest to know who you are. I would ask her directly. But don't await a concret answer, it can be she cannot find.Believe in yourself and what your feelings are telling you.

She even had the audacity to tell me that "I" was being rude for not just introducing myself to her people!!! WHAT THE FUCK???

My take is that she was keeping everything obscure in case there were options other than myself that were there....period. There is no other feasible explanation for this bullshit.

But hey...it is only four months.....so I must letitgo!

Next!!

DexMSR said:

Life is too short to put up with bullshit.

babynoz said:

I can't think of any other reasons for actions such as this....

MBlaineEverywhere said:

Very true....this is all your fault.....he he he....LOL!!!!

How rude...give her a good ol' WHAP that will teach her a lesson.

mostbeautifulgrlntheworld said:

I let her ass go...how bout that?

Whap!!

DexMSR said:

Its what I would have done, if I was in your shoes..trifflin'.... nevermnd
[Edited 5/21/07 22:45pm]

DexMSR said:

You deserve better than that.....she was rude, self absorbed, and immature....

Move on, my friend.

DexMSR said:

How she behaved was bullshit, no doubt, but. . . I CAN think of another reason.

You're highly social and may find this difficult to understand, but some of us are rather socially awkward and may fail to do things that seem obviously appropriate to other people. I've been called on things sorta like this. . . it's NOT intentional. And I've gotten better over the years. But what comes naturally to you does not come naturally to me.

So. .. maybe it would be worth talking to her. It sounds like you just got pissed and walked away, and that's fine to an extent. You shouldn't cause a scene at a BBQ. But I think you should have a discussion with her and maybe try to understand what was going on for her.

And maybe she's just an ass, I don't know.

DexMSR said:

Thats rude, I wont even begin to try to understand why she would do such a thing.
Where's the southern hospitality?

I'd certainly move on
[Edited 5/22/07 7:37am]

Sounds like a bad sign, Dex. You don't need that shit.