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Thread started 05/23/07 6:39am

LaCoyta

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How to give the perfect lap dance?

I want to be able to give an amazing lap dance. I'm not rich, I don't look like a centerfold, I'm not smart, I can't make gourmet food so I have to make up for it somehow. All I can come up w/ is to give an amazing lap dance. But I don't know how to do that! Any advice on giving the best lap dance ever?
If it doesn't fit, it's ugly anyway.
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Reply #1 posted 05/23/07 6:46am

retina

Check out this book instead:

http://www.amazon.com/Rai...868&sr=8-6

It addresses your only real problem.
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Reply #2 posted 05/23/07 6:47am

REDFEATHERS

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Pay a professional to do it for you..
I will love you forever and you will never be forgotten - L.A.F. heart
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Reply #3 posted 05/23/07 6:50am

LaCoyta

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REDFEATHERS said:

Pay a professional to do it for you..

Hell, no! The reason for doing it yourself is to keep any man you may have from professionals
If it doesn't fit, it's ugly anyway.
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Reply #4 posted 05/23/07 8:20am

Tonylover

LaCoyta said:

REDFEATHERS said:

Pay a professional to do it for you..

Hell, no! The reason for doing it yourself is to keep any man you may have from professionals


If you want fun and simple. I recommend Carmen Electra's Fit to Strip short series. I love it! I love doing it to a chair for practise lol, it's going to be VERY different when I do it to am actual real life boy lol. If only a worthy one would come into my life and then I would have the opportunity to show them my talents. They don't know what they are missing.
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Reply #5 posted 05/23/07 8:23am

FunkMistress

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retina said:

Check out this book instead:

http://www.amazon.com/Rai...868&sr=8-6

It addresses your only real problem.


lol
CHICKENS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO COCAINE, SILKY HEN.
The Normal Whores Club
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Reply #6 posted 05/23/07 8:41am

Mach

LaCoyta said:

I want to be able to give an amazing lap dance. I'm not rich, I don't look like a centerfold, I'm not smart, I can't make gourmet food so I have to make up for it somehow. All I can come up w/ is to give an amazing lap dance. But I don't know how to do that! Any advice on giving the best lap dance ever?


To give the "best lap dance ever" you will need to teach yourself that,
along with how to find your internal richness and centerfold as well as what area you are smart in and perhaps how to cook as well ...

the best lap dance ever comes from within as do all the other things you say you are not

peace and best wishes
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Reply #7 posted 05/23/07 8:44am

FunkMistress

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Mach said:



the best lap dance ever comes from within



This sounds like a line from a porno version of an after school special... "look deep within your heart for the power to make him cream his pants!"
CHICKENS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO COCAINE, SILKY HEN.
The Normal Whores Club
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Reply #8 posted 05/23/07 8:45am

Mach

FunkMistress said:

Mach said:



the best lap dance ever comes from within



This sounds like a line from a porno version of an after school special... "look deep within your heart for the power to make him cream his pants!"



lol


OMG

I'm an after school porn queen

evillol
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Reply #9 posted 05/23/07 1:05pm

LaCoyta

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Tonylover said:

LaCoyta said:


Hell, no! The reason for doing it yourself is to keep any man you may have from professionals


If you want fun and simple. I recommend Carmen Electra's Fit to Strip short series. I love it! I love doing it to a chair for practise lol, it's going to be VERY different when I do it to am actual real life boy lol. If only a worthy one would come into my life and then I would have the opportunity to show them my talents. They don't know what they are missing.

Did you get yourself stripper shoes yet? To me that's the best part, the trashy shoes (though I'd fall right over in them).
If it doesn't fit, it's ugly anyway.
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Reply #10 posted 05/23/07 1:07pm

mdiver

LaCoyta said:

I want to be able to give an amazing lap dance. I'm not rich, I don't look like a centerfold, I'm not smart, I can't make gourmet food so I have to make up for it somehow. All I can come up w/ is to give an amazing lap dance. But I don't know how to do that! Any advice on giving the best lap dance ever?



Hi 9sey wave
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Reply #11 posted 05/23/07 1:08pm

evenstar3

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mdiver said:

LaCoyta said:

I want to be able to give an amazing lap dance. I'm not rich, I don't look like a centerfold, I'm not smart, I can't make gourmet food so I have to make up for it somehow. All I can come up w/ is to give an amazing lap dance. But I don't know how to do that! Any advice on giving the best lap dance ever?



Hi 9sey wave



eek
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Reply #12 posted 05/23/07 1:09pm

retina

LaCoyta said:

Tonylover said:



If you want fun and simple. I recommend Carmen Electra's Fit to Strip short series. I love it! I love doing it to a chair for practise lol, it's going to be VERY different when I do it to am actual real life boy lol. If only a worthy one would come into my life and then I would have the opportunity to show them my talents. They don't know what they are missing.

Did you get yourself stripper shoes yet? To me that's the best part, the trashy shoes (though I'd fall right over in them).


http://www.youtube.com/wa...2e9pBuR-e8
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Reply #13 posted 05/23/07 1:10pm

mdiver

A mate of mine told me a story about a dance he got off a real scorching girl in a club once...only trouble was she was a bit drunk...she gave it all she had...really went for it ...except there were 2 of them there..him and the girl.....someone farted.....and it wasn't him! falloff I would have so lost it
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Reply #14 posted 05/23/07 1:13pm

JustErin

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LaCoyta said:

I want to be able to give an amazing lap dance. I'm not rich, I don't look like a centerfold, I'm not smart, I can't make gourmet food so I have to make up for it somehow. All I can come up w/ is to give an amazing lap dance. But I don't know how to do that! Any advice on giving the best lap dance ever?



If you're not smart, you won't be able to understand our advice anyway. shrug

Just let him do you in the ass instead. There's not much to learn about that, so you should be fine.
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Reply #15 posted 05/23/07 1:14pm

mdiver

JustErin said:

LaCoyta said:

I want to be able to give an amazing lap dance. I'm not rich, I don't look like a centerfold, I'm not smart, I can't make gourmet food so I have to make up for it somehow. All I can come up w/ is to give an amazing lap dance. But I don't know how to do that! Any advice on giving the best lap dance ever?



If you're not smart, you won't be able to understand our advice anyway. shrug

Just let him do you in the ass instead. There's not much to learn about that, so you should be fine.


falloff


How to keep a man #101 by Justerin lol
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Reply #16 posted 05/23/07 1:15pm

ThreadCula

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mdiver said:

JustErin said:




If you're not smart, you won't be able to understand our advice anyway. shrug

Just let him do you in the ass instead. There's not much to learn about that, so you should be fine.


falloff


How to keep a man #101 by Justerin lol


OMG!!! falloff
"Nobody makes me bleed my own blood...NOBODY!"
johnart says: "I'm THE shit"
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Reply #17 posted 05/24/07 6:30am

Tonylover

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Reply #18 posted 05/24/07 6:36am

Tonylover

LaCoyta said:

Tonylover said:



If you want fun and simple. I recommend Carmen Electra's Fit to Strip short series. I love it! I love doing it to a chair for practise lol, it's going to be VERY different when I do it to am actual real life boy lol. If only a worthy one would come into my life and then I would have the opportunity to show them my talents. They don't know what they are missing.

Did you get yourself stripper shoes yet? To me that's the best part, the trashy shoes (though I'd fall right over in them).



Hell yeah!

Carmen Electra goes for the whole fuck-me boots, tie and shirt get-up. I tried that, but I don't think I pulled it off. Think..Demi Moore, Striptease. Specifically the scene where she strips to "Money Can't Buy It" by Annie Lennox. This song and Paula Cole's "Feelin' Love" are great songs to strip 2. "Feelin' Love" is very sensual and "Money Can't Buy It" is very sexually aggressive, I personally think. Depends on your mood.

Get a group of girlfriends together and practise, lol. That's what I did.
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Reply #19 posted 05/24/07 8:14am

purplehippieon
the1

JustErin said:

LaCoyta said:

I want to be able to give an amazing lap dance. I'm not rich, I don't look like a centerfold, I'm not smart, I can't make gourmet food so I have to make up for it somehow. All I can come up w/ is to give an amazing lap dance. But I don't know how to do that! Any advice on giving the best lap dance ever?



If you're not smart, you won't be able to understand our advice anyway. shrug

Just let him do you in the ass instead. There's not much to learn about that, so you should be fine.

falloff

I like the way you think. biggrin
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