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Thread started 04/27/07 11:23am

LisasBrush

A Barbara Walters Report: Living as and with a Transgender Kid

ABC NEWS’ “20/20,” FRIDAY, APRIL 27

From the moment we are born, our gender identity is no secret – we are either boys or girls. As we grow up, most of us naturally fit into our gender roles. But for some children, it is not so simple… they insist they were born into the wrong bodies. Barbara Walters reports on some of the youngest transgender kids, including a six-year-old girl who was born a boy, a 10-year-old boy who lives as a girl and a 16-year-old-boy who was born a girl. Walters talks to these transgender children, all diagnosed with gender identity disorder (GID), as well as their parents, who are allowing their children to live in the gender they identify with in order to save them from a future of heartache and pain. They are sharing their personal stories to increase future understanding of transgender children. But how can someone so young really know their true gender identity? Walters’ eye-opening report airs on “20/20,” FRIDAY, APRIL 27 (10:00-11:00 p.m., ET), on the ABC Television Network.

JAZZ, 6 -- On the surface, Scott and Renee and their four children are a typical American family. Yet their youngest, Jazz, is a six-year-old transgender girl, one of the youngest documented cases of an early transition from male to female. At only 15 months, Jazz would unsnap his onesies to make it look like a dress and at two he asked his mom when he would become a girl. He was only three when their pediatrician told them Jazz had a serious problem. When he was diagnosed with GID, the Jennings wanted to do everything possible to avoid having their child suffer. They let their then five-year-old biological boy begin living fulltime as a girl – Jazz grew her hair out, pierced her ears, and now wears dresses everywhere, even to kindergarten. ”We felt that it would be a good time for her to come out of the closet. Because she's starting a new school, doesn't know anybody in her class, and this is a perfect opportunity for her to switch the pronoun,” says Renee.

RILEY, 10 -- ”She has a birth defect. And we call it that.... She talks about the day she'll have a baby. That's not in her future,” Stephanie says about her transgender child Riley, who was born a twin boy named Richard. From the beginning, the twins were different – Richard wanted to be just like his twin sister Allie. For years he secretly dressed up in her clothes. In 2004, at age seven, Richard’s parents allowed him to transition from a boy to a girl. He, now she, eventually changed her name legally to Riley. But living as a girl has brought on other problems including taunting and teasing at school. Riley is now on the cusp of puberty, a difficult time for a transgender child who wants to identify with the opposite sex.

JEREMY, 16 -- On December 19, 2004, 14-year-old Rebecca wrote a startling letter to her parents. By the end, she was no longer “Rebecca” but “Jeremy.” After years of struggling silently, Jeremy, with his parent’s consent, began to transition into a boy. He cut his hair short, bought male clothing and began wearing a lycra vest that painfully flattened his breasts. Jeremy was generally accepted by his classmates but beneath his clothing, Jeremy was a girl in puberty. “From the time that I found out what it meant to be transgendered, I knew that there were physical changes that I could make… and I also knew that there were surgeries that could be done,” Jeremy tells Walters.

But Jeremy’s parents were cautious. They allowed him to dress as a boy, but refused to let him start injecting testosterone. Without the male hormone, Jeremy felt trapped between genders. A year after coming out, he started to physically hurt himself when he discovered that his mother still hoped for her daughter to return. For his parents the threat of losing their child crystallized the urgency Jeremy felt to masculinize his body and last year, Jeremy, then 16, began injecting testosterone.

The report also features interviews with sex and gender experts including the therapist who confirmed Jazz’s diagnoses, and the doctor who is treating Jeremy. Experts are divided about when to start hormone therapy treatment, which is not without risk, as well as the question of if or when to have sex reassignment surgery. Some fear that gender non-conforming children could change their minds about their gender identity later in life. Walters reports on the first study to quantify the harmful effects rejection has on gender non-conforming young people. Researchers found that youths who were highly pressured by their families to conform to gender expectations were nearly four times as likely to attempt suicide and use illegal drugs and twice as likely to be at high risk for HIV infection. But for those accepted by their parents, these risks were dramatically reduced.

These parents also talk about the importance of the unconditional love they have for their children. “I've talked to many adult transgender people… And they said ‘if only my mother or father had done what you're doing, my life would have been completely different.’… The bottom line is, you want a happy, healthy child to enjoy life,” says Renee. “This is not easy…it would be the last thing I would wish on anyone. But the first thing I'd say that people should stand up and recognize is your child's right to be who they are,” says Stephanie.

Why are these families exposing something so personal on national television? “I want to pave the way for a better life for her (Jazz), and any trans kids. They didn't ask to be born this way,” Renee tells Walters. “I want Riley to have a good life...and for more people to understand the way she is. And that it's no fault of her own, or anyone else's,” Riley’s father Neal tells Walters. His wife Stephanie adds: “We have to support her - but we don't walk in her shoes. And people who look at her and know her...will, I hope, realize what it takes for her to be her every single day.”

Please note: some of the names have been changed for the broadcast and promotional purposes.
noituloveryxesevolasildnaydnew
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Reply #1 posted 04/27/07 11:29am

MIGUELGOMEZ

I can't wait to see this!!!!


M
MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits"
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Reply #2 posted 04/27/07 11:31am

LisasBrush

MIGUELGOMEZ said:

I can't wait to see this!!!!


M

i'll be on a plane -- gotta tape it!
noituloveryxesevolasildnaydnew
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Reply #3 posted 04/27/07 12:04pm

2freaky4church
1

avatar

For a minute there I thought your name was MissBush. lol
All you others say Hell Yea!! woot!
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Reply #4 posted 04/27/07 12:09pm

LisasBrush

2freaky4church1 said:

For a minute there I thought your name was MissBush. lol

eek! wink
noituloveryxesevolasildnaydnew
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Reply #5 posted 04/28/07 12:36am

weepingwall

i saw it.
very touching.
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Reply #6 posted 04/28/07 12:15pm

MIGUELGOMEZ

Loved the report. JAS was absolutely adoreable!!!!! They all were. It's so wonderful that the parents of these kids are supporting and listening to them.


M
MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits"
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Reply #7 posted 04/28/07 12:31pm

Imago

For those of you who were completely ignorant of this, watch "Boys Don't Cry" with Hilary Swank.


At the end scene when (After the brutal scene in the parcking lot), when she was talking to the doctor and was unable to say the word "vagina", I finally woke up and understood what it is that they are thinking.

I mean, if I woke up everyday with a vagina, and I knew that I was "Dan the man", it would be hell. These people aren't trying to be something they're not. They're trying to be something whole, which they can't be until they get their new gender assignments. Well, unless you're that manpussy porn guy or whatever. shrug
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Reply #8 posted 04/28/07 12:32pm

veronikka

I only saw Jazz and Riley, Riley broke my heart when she started crying while Barbara was interviewing her, so sad. But these kids are so young still I cant help but wonder if when they get older they will change the way think and the parents are starting their treatments at an early age?????
Rhythm floods my heart♥The melody it feeds my soul
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Reply #9 posted 04/28/07 2:52pm

MIGUELGOMEZ

veronikka said:

I only saw Jazz and Riley, Riley broke my heart when she started crying while Barbara was interviewing her, so sad. But these kids are so young still I cant help but wonder if when they get older they will change the way think and the parents are starting their treatments at an early age?????




Although I know nothing is really cut and dry, black or white, whatever you want to call it, this is something totally different. If these kids think that way at so young an age, I think it's pretty set.

Having said that and lived 40 years, I'm sure there will be an exception.

M
MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits"
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Reply #10 posted 04/28/07 4:45pm

MIGUELGOMEZ




How cute is she!!!!!


M
MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits"
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Reply #11 posted 04/29/07 1:18am

Janfriend

Funny how I talked about Zoe and people here were either mean or didn't give a shit
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Reply #12 posted 04/29/07 5:41am

psychodelicide

avatar

MIGUELGOMEZ said:




How cute is she!!!!!


M


She's VERY cute. nod This show was very touching, and I learned a lot from it.
RIP, mom. I will forever miss and love you.
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Reply #13 posted 04/29/07 11:22am

MIGUELGOMEZ

Janfriend said:

Funny how I talked about Zoe and people here were either mean or didn't give a shit



Was this a thread you started? I missed it.


M
MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits"
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Reply #14 posted 04/29/07 12:15pm

Janfriend

MIGUELGOMEZ said:

Janfriend said:

Funny how I talked about Zoe and people here were either mean or didn't give a shit



Was this a thread you started? I missed it.


M


Yes

http://www.prince.org/msg/100/223743
[Edited 4/29/07 12:16pm]
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Reply #15 posted 04/29/07 12:25pm

LisasBrush

Janfriend said:


can't believe that was this month. seems like it was longer.
noituloveryxesevolasildnaydnew
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Reply #16 posted 04/29/07 5:11pm

Janfriend

LisasBrush said:

Janfriend said:


can't believe that was this month. seems like it was longer.


Hey Chris, did you watch any of the clips I posted?
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Reply #17 posted 04/30/07 7:11pm

Janfriend

Can we discuss this? I personally wouldn't let my child transition until they are 18. I think transitioning before puberty can be dangerous
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Reply #18 posted 04/30/07 11:26pm

LisasBrush

Janfriend said:

LisasBrush said:


can't believe that was this month. seems like it was longer.


Hey Chris, did you watch any of the clips I posted?


boxed nope.

i only watched the episode that Andy was in.
noituloveryxesevolasildnaydnew
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Reply #19 posted 04/30/07 11:27pm

LisasBrush

Janfriend said:

Can we discuss this? I personally wouldn't let my child transition until they are 18. I think transitioning before puberty can be dangerous

i agree that surgery and hormones should not be invloved before that point.
noituloveryxesevolasildnaydnew
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Reply #20 posted 05/01/07 12:02am

Janfriend

LisasBrush said:

Janfriend said:



Hey Chris, did you watch any of the clips I posted?


boxed nope.

i only watched the episode that Andy was in.


no no no! spank
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Reply #21 posted 05/01/07 12:20am

LisasBrush

Janfriend said:

no no no! spank

i heard that it was a fair, accurate & inclusive representation, very well done. and a great way to hit that audience. i'm just not the soap audience. wink
noituloveryxesevolasildnaydnew
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Reply #22 posted 05/01/07 11:06am

Janfriend

LisasBrush said:

Janfriend said:

no no no! spank

i heard that it was a fair, accurate & inclusive representation, very well done. and a great way to hit that audience. i'm just not the soap audience. wink


What is "that audience?"
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Reply #23 posted 05/01/07 11:08am

JasmineFire

Janfriend said:

LisasBrush said:


i heard that it was a fair, accurate & inclusive representation, very well done. and a great way to hit that audience. i'm just not the soap audience. wink


What is "that audience?"

probably people who watch soaps.
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Reply #24 posted 05/01/07 11:13am

LisasBrush

JasmineFire said:

probably people who watch soaps.

yes.
noituloveryxesevolasildnaydnew
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Reply #25 posted 05/01/07 11:17am

JasmineFire

i honestly don't know how I would react if my 6 or 10 year old child came to me talking about how they're the wrong gender and that God made a mistake. I don't know if I would really take them that seriously at that age. I would be more apt to take a 16 year old seriously than a 6 year old. Kids do strange things all the time and often times they grow out of it. I certainly wouldn't let a child of mine walk around cross dressing and shooting up hormones...that would have to wait until they were 18 and out of the house.

Are there any parents on the .Org who can comment on this? I don't have children so who knows what I would really do. It just seems so strange to me. Homosexuality I understand...bisexuality I kinda understand...being transgendered goes way over my head...I just don't get it. shrug
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Reply #26 posted 05/01/07 11:24am

MIGUELGOMEZ

JasmineFire said:

i honestly don't know how I would react if my 6 or 10 year old child came to me talking about how they're the wrong gender and that God made a mistake. I don't know if I would really take them that seriously at that age. I would be more apt to take a 16 year old seriously than a 6 year old. Kids do strange things all the time and often times they grow out of it. I certainly wouldn't let a child of mine walk around cross dressing and shooting up hormones...that would have to wait until they were 18 and out of the house.

Are there any parents on the .Org who can comment on this? I don't have children so who knows what I would really do. It just seems so strange to me. Homosexuality I understand...bisexuality I kinda understand...being transgendered goes way over my head...I just don't get it. shrug



I just think of it this way. I'm a man and everyone in my daily life is calling me by a female pronoun. I know I'm a man but everyone else doesn't get it.

I can only imagine a transgendered person's frustration.

M
MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits"
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Reply #27 posted 05/01/07 11:29am

Imago

psychodelicide said:

MIGUELGOMEZ said:




How cute is she!!!!!


M


She's VERY cute. nod This show was very touching, and I learned a lot from it.

ok, when we're saying "she" do we mean she in the sense that this is the gender this person identifies with, or are their bits and pieces actually female? confuse




Also, does anyone know if there is something psychically that took place developmentally in the child to cause this orientation? Or has it yet not been pinned down?

This is fascinating.
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Reply #28 posted 05/01/07 11:35am

JasmineFire

MIGUELGOMEZ said:

JasmineFire said:

i honestly don't know how I would react if my 6 or 10 year old child came to me talking about how they're the wrong gender and that God made a mistake. I don't know if I would really take them that seriously at that age. I would be more apt to take a 16 year old seriously than a 6 year old. Kids do strange things all the time and often times they grow out of it. I certainly wouldn't let a child of mine walk around cross dressing and shooting up hormones...that would have to wait until they were 18 and out of the house.

Are there any parents on the .Org who can comment on this? I don't have children so who knows what I would really do. It just seems so strange to me. Homosexuality I understand...bisexuality I kinda understand...being transgendered goes way over my head...I just don't get it. shrug



I just think of it this way. I'm a man and everyone in my daily life is calling me by a female pronoun. I know I'm a man but everyone else doesn't get it.

I can only imagine a transgendered person's frustration.

M

I guess my confusion comes from the whole mind body disconnect that must be going on for transgendered people. I know I'm a woman because I have a female body, hormones, etc. I don't know how you know you're a woman when you have a man's body. That just doesn't make any sense to me. I can accept it as a part of the human spectrum of being and I don't think that these people should be discriminated against or hurt for being who they are but I'm not sure if I will ever understand who they are or why they are that way.
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Reply #29 posted 05/01/07 1:28pm

MIGUELGOMEZ

JasmineFire said:

MIGUELGOMEZ said:




I just think of it this way. I'm a man and everyone in my daily life is calling me by a female pronoun. I know I'm a man but everyone else doesn't get it.

I can only imagine a transgendered person's frustration.

M

I guess my confusion comes from the whole mind body disconnect that must be going on for transgendered people. I know I'm a woman because I have a female body, hormones, etc. I don't know how you know you're a woman when you have a man's body. That just doesn't make any sense to me. I can accept it as a part of the human spectrum of being and I don't think that these people should be discriminated against or hurt for being who they are but I'm not sure if I will ever understand who they are or why they are that way.




I totally understand how some people DON'T understand. I'm just one that kinda gets it. That's why it's so important to talk about. And you're totally right, I don't know what I'd do myself. I do know that I would be supportive.

hug

M
MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits"
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