Ok,

So my 2 sisters have 5 children between them. Im the single younger brother.

We used to have a good relationship before the kids came along. now, i love the kids, but my sisters and i have drifted apart, and my two sisters are closer than ever.

The reason? Every time i see them, every conversation is about children, schools, clothes sizes and how much each child has *cough* used the bathroom each day.

Im unable to relate at all to this conversation, i have no kids and dont want any at all. So i just sit there at family get-togethers and just wait for it o finish and go home. Its become a pain to see them and not be able to talk to them about anything non-children related.

When i start a conversation about anything at all, it will ALWAYS revert back to the kids.

Now the reason i havent said anything directly to them is they are very emotional and touchy on the subject, and the first answer i would get is; "Why dont you love the kids!?"

Arrgh! What to do? Should i wait until these kids are all over 10, and then try to have a normal conversation with my sisters again?

Any1 have any advice?

Thx.

Their lives have changed.

Deal with it.

This is why I hate family reunions.

I'm the youngest grandchild and I'm the only one not married with children. And some of those kids have kids already. And that's all the ladies talk about. It used to drive me nuts. Now I just grin through it and go home.

Now, my girlfriend who has children still has a life beyond her child and has plenty to talk about other than that. Not that I don't hear about him too (and I genuinely want to!), but she can hold conversations about other things as well.

I don't have any advice, but I know what your saying.

When I was in my early 20's I used to work with a bunch of women who were ALL mom's and I used to alwyas joke that, there's like this mom's club that ALL they do is talk about their kids, and I can't join.

All of them would laugh about it, so I don't see why your sisters wouldn't ALSO laugh about it if you said something like that to them in a joking manner.

What do you wanna talk about?

Just talk about it.....and let them jump in like normal conversation.

JustErin said:

Thats not very kind advice..

REDFEATHERS said:

I thought it was hilarious.

SureThing said:

Oh I wouldnt say it was hilarious per se.. unless you just dont get out much.. and so I can understand

But he is calling out for advice and it is understandable he is feeling left out..

what I say is xperience319

.. take out your nieces and nephews for the day or baby sit.. make sure your sisters leave you a drink or DVDs but get involved, and I am sure if you have an interest in them then you and your sisters can share an interest in you..

and if they really arent interested and closed off completely talking babies then voice your concerns aned tell them how you really feel..

Good Luck!
[Edited 4/3/07 11:36am]

I absolutely love my nephews, though I generally don't like other kids. Actually I loathe other kids.

But what I noticed about my sister is not that she talks alot about her kids, but that they interrupt her all the time, and she will stop a conversation in mid sentence and talk to them. She sometimes catches what's happenning--that they're interrupting just to get her attention (or mine), but normally she lets them get away with frequent interruptions whether she's on the phone or talking to someone face-to-face.

It takes about 15 minutest to talk about something that could have taken 5, and I'm not exaggerating.

When I took my nephews out for the day (The beach, movies, etc.), they knew better than to interrupt adult conversation without saying "Excuse me", and they knew better than to do it just to do it.

You stuck for words there, SureThing?

REDFEATHERS said:

Well thats my sense of humor.

Deal with it.

JustErin said:

It's interesting that you would say that since you're one of the very few mums I know who can actually talk about plenty of things other than kids. So apparently it can be done.

But yeah - it would be really hard to force someone who doesn't want to, to talk about other stuff. Which is too bad in this case because I agree with the original poster that it can get really boring to listen to endless anecdotes about burps and diapers.

SureThing said:

Interesting..

Next time you attend a family get together, take a friend along. That way you won't feel like a spectator to everyone else's conversations and can have your own fun. Maybe bring something to do like batmitten(sp)croquet.
If you want to spend more one-on-one time, invite your sisters to a movie and see if their spouses can babysit.

thanks for the tips guys/gals.

the worst thing i can possibly do is tell them that all they do is talk about kids, as they see this as me "not loving my neices/nephews", and say it verbally point blank.

I babysit once a week for sevral hours, as well as see them/play with them for about 3 other nights each week. The kids are great fun, but the mums not so much...

seems the only way in is to have children, which i dont want at all....sigh.

what ages are the kids?

I know I have got to the point where I am TOTALLY OVER talking about baby/kids crap. I know I lapse into that kind of talk now and then, I can't help it, they take up about 80% of my waking thoughts, but I don't WANT to I WANT to talk and think about other stuff, and I am making an effort

5 kids aged 1,2,3,4 & 5. thats true unfortunatley!

xperience319 said:

well I reckon they will eventually get over it too maybe once a lot of those kids are in school and your sisters get their lives back.

xperience319 said:

Wow these are very young children and will take up all the mother's time - unfortunately for you.

I have a daughter who is 25 yrs old and three grandchildren and I have now adopted 2 children aged now 4 and 5 but I adopted them when they were 10months and 20months old. Its very hard work and you just get caught up in the world of babies and it can be very isolating so your sisters are very lucky to have each other. When the children go to school another world opens up to them as they meet other Mums and then conversations take another turn and it is not so kid orientated! I'm afraid you will have to be patient. When your sisters create a life outside of children thats when they will have different subjects to talk about but at the moment their babies are their life and so they talk about things that they can relate to.

I think it is good advice to take a friend along, if possible, to family reunions etc you might be surprised and find that when it is an outsider to talk to their conversations might divert from children!

Anyway, you should think on the positive side that they are close and have each other but when you become a Dad (you might you never know!) you will surprised how your conversation will be taken up by babies and you will never be bored of the subject!