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Thread started 03/31/07 4:27pm

ThreadBare

OK, so what is it with girls???

So, I have this female friend who for the past year has done her best to stay on my radar.

Usually she was her most vocal when I was dating someone else. And, recently a mutual friend of ours started teasing us about each other. I was like, "Dude, stay out of my business. We're friends."

#1) I'm straight-up with other women, if I'm seeing somebody. I don't like drama, and I certainly don't want folks think I'm the two-timing type. Because, I'm not.

#2) That said, I hate confusion. So, I thought it worth clearing the air with my friend. And, since I don't believe in holding "disloyal/shady" conversations when I'm seeing someone, I waited until being on the outs with my g/f to clear the air with the friend.

She, of course, owned up to paying me a bunch of compliments and such and to thinking there might be some interest on my part. But said that she would prefer we remain friends. Which is cool with me; I really just wanted to clear the air (and, that's not a male ego wailing -- it's the truth).

But, my question is: Why do women work so hard to get on a dude's radar and then bail, when you call them on it?

I chalk it up to immaturity, but I'd appreciate some more perspective. Preferrably from you women-folk... hmm



.
[Edited 3/31/07 16:28pm]
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Reply #1 posted 03/31/07 4:28pm

REDFEATHERS

avatar

This is SOOO not about me.. tease
I will love you forever and you will never be forgotten - L.A.F. heart
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Reply #2 posted 03/31/07 4:29pm

ThreadBare

REDFEATHERS said:

This is SOOO not about me.. tease


Focus, Red!!!!

mad
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Reply #3 posted 03/31/07 4:31pm

ZombieKitten

biggrin here is a theory (but only a theory)

she has a crush on you, and agrees with you because she is afraid if she admits to you - now you have already cleared the air - that she has feelings for you, you might want to see much less of her because it would be awkward?
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Reply #4 posted 03/31/07 4:31pm

REDFEATHERS

avatar

ThreadBare said:

REDFEATHERS said:

This is SOOO not about me.. tease


Focus, Red!!!!

mad



Sorry.. I just keep thinking about your *photo* lol wink
I will love you forever and you will never be forgotten - L.A.F. heart
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Reply #5 posted 03/31/07 4:32pm

mdiver

ThreadBare said:

So, I have this female friend who for the past year has done her best to stay on my radar.

Usually she was her most vocal when I was dating someone else. And, recently a mutual friend of ours started teasing us about each other. I was like, "Dude, stay out of my business. We're friends."

#1) I'm straight-up with other women, if I'm seeing somebody. I don't like drama, and I certainly don't want folks think I'm the two-timing type. Because, I'm not.

#2) That said, I hate confusion. So, I thought it worth clearing the air with my friend. And, since I don't believe in holding "disloyal/shady" conversations when I'm seeing someone, I waited until being on the outs with my g/f to clear the air with the friend.

She, of course, owned up to paying me a bunch of compliments and such and to thinking there might be some interest on my part. But said that she would prefer we remain friends. Which is cool with me; I really just wanted to clear the air (and, that's not a male ego wailing -- it's the truth).

But, my question is: Why do women work so hard to get on a dude's radar and then bail, when you call them on it?

I chalk it up to immaturity, but I'd appreciate some more perspective. Preferrably from you women-folk... hmm



.
[Edited 3/31/07 16:28pm]



Just nail her dude! wink
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Reply #6 posted 03/31/07 4:35pm

ZombieKitten

I didn't even read that properly nuts so many words!
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Reply #7 posted 03/31/07 4:35pm

REDFEATHERS

avatar

ZombieKitten said:

biggrin here is a theory (but only a theory)

she has a crush on you, and agrees with you because she is afraid if she admits to you - now you have already cleared the air - that she has feelings for you, you might want to see much less of her because it would be awkward?



yes I agree.. and maybe she just loves you as a friend, but a bit more so than other male friends.. or maybe she is just standing back.. now to give you the space you need, cos she does respect your wishes

Or you have too big an ego and she is just being genuinely friendly but you have taken it the other way

OR she really believes in time to come you and her could have something

Or maybe she is just a lesbian and is after your g/f and doesnt wanna hurt you..

lol
[Edited 3/31/07 16:36pm]
I will love you forever and you will never be forgotten - L.A.F. heart
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Reply #8 posted 03/31/07 4:35pm

ThreadBare

mdiver said:

ThreadBare said:

So, I have this female friend who for the past year has done her best to stay on my radar.

Usually she was her most vocal when I was dating someone else. And, recently a mutual friend of ours started teasing us about each other. I was like, "Dude, stay out of my business. We're friends."

#1) I'm straight-up with other women, if I'm seeing somebody. I don't like drama, and I certainly don't want folks think I'm the two-timing type. Because, I'm not.

#2) That said, I hate confusion. So, I thought it worth clearing the air with my friend. And, since I don't believe in holding "disloyal/shady" conversations when I'm seeing someone, I waited until being on the outs with my g/f to clear the air with the friend.

She, of course, owned up to paying me a bunch of compliments and such and to thinking there might be some interest on my part. But said that she would prefer we remain friends. Which is cool with me; I really just wanted to clear the air (and, that's not a male ego wailing -- it's the truth).

But, my question is: Why do women work so hard to get on a dude's radar and then bail, when you call them on it?

I chalk it up to immaturity, but I'd appreciate some more perspective. Preferrably from you women-folk... hmm



.
[Edited 3/31/07 16:28pm]



Just nail her dude! wink


nah. not my overriding interest. looking for something permanent.

I try to shun fornicative ways.

plus i like her family.
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Reply #9 posted 03/31/07 4:35pm

REDFEATHERS

avatar

ZombieKitten said:

I didn't even read that properly nuts so many words!



me neither, I just read your reply and continued on that lol
I will love you forever and you will never be forgotten - L.A.F. heart
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Reply #10 posted 03/31/07 4:36pm

Shanti1

mdiver said:

ThreadBare said:

So, I have this female friend who for the past year has done her best to stay on my radar.

Usually she was her most vocal when I was dating someone else. And, recently a mutual friend of ours started teasing us about each other. I was like, "Dude, stay out of my business. We're friends."

#1) I'm straight-up with other women, if I'm seeing somebody. I don't like drama, and I certainly don't want folks think I'm the two-timing type. Because, I'm not.

#2) That said, I hate confusion. So, I thought it worth clearing the air with my friend. And, since I don't believe in holding "disloyal/shady" conversations when I'm seeing someone, I waited until being on the outs with my g/f to clear the air with the friend.

She, of course, owned up to paying me a bunch of compliments and such and to thinking there might be some interest on my part. But said that she would prefer we remain friends. Which is cool with me; I really just wanted to clear the air (and, that's not a male ego wailing -- it's the truth).

But, my question is: Why do women work so hard to get on a dude's radar and then bail, when you call them on it?

I chalk it up to immaturity, but I'd appreciate some more perspective. Preferrably from you women-folk... hmm



.
[Edited 3/31/07 16:28pm]



Just nail her dude! wink



spoken like a true gentlemen
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Reply #11 posted 03/31/07 4:38pm

mdiver

Shanti1 said:

mdiver said:




Just nail her dude! wink



spoken like a true gentlemen



tonk

Come get it!
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Reply #12 posted 03/31/07 4:38pm

statuesqque

ZombieKitten said:

biggrin here is a theory (but only a theory)

she has a crush on you, and agrees with you because she is afraid if she admits to you - now you have already cleared the air - that she has feelings for you, you might want to see much less of her because it would be awkward?



I agree..
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Reply #13 posted 03/31/07 4:38pm

ThreadBare

REDFEATHERS said:

ZombieKitten said:

biggrin here is a theory (but only a theory)

she has a crush on you, and agrees with you because she is afraid if she admits to you - now you have already cleared the air - that she has feelings for you, you might want to see much less of her because it would be awkward?



yes I agree.. and maybe she just loves you as a friend, but a bit more so than other male friends.. or maybe she is just standing back.. now to give you the space you need, cos she does respect your wishes

Or you have too big an ego and she is just being genuinely friendly but you have taken it the other way

OR she really believes in time to come you and her could have something

Or maybe she is just a lesbian and is after your g/f and doesnt wanna hurt you..

lol


no, she was clear about not being interested in leaving the placid suburb of Platonia for the bustling metropolis of Heartsville. (bear with me. I'm working on a book and just wanted to see that in print...)


.
[Edited 3/31/07 16:39pm]
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Reply #14 posted 03/31/07 4:39pm

LleeLlee

ThreadBare said:

So, I have this female friend who for the past year has done her best to stay on my radar.

Usually she was her most vocal when I was dating someone else. And, recently a mutual friend of ours started teasing us about each other. I was like, "Dude, stay out of my business. We're friends."

#1) I'm straight-up with other women, if I'm seeing somebody. I don't like drama, and I certainly don't want folks think I'm the two-timing type. Because, I'm not.

#2) That said, I hate confusion. So, I thought it worth clearing the air with my friend. And, since I don't believe in holding "disloyal/shady" conversations when I'm seeing someone, I waited until being on the outs with my g/f to clear the air with the friend.

She, of course, owned up to paying me a bunch of compliments and such and to thinking there might be some interest on my part. But said that she would prefer we remain friends. Which is cool with me; I really just wanted to clear the air (and, that's not a male ego wailing -- it's the truth).

But, my question is: Why do women work so hard to get on a dude's radar and then bail, when you call them on it?

I chalk it up to immaturity, but I'd appreciate some more perspective. Preferrably from you women-folk... hmm



.
[Edited 3/31/07 16:28pm]


what do you mean? She disliked all your girlfriends?
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Reply #15 posted 03/31/07 4:40pm

mdiver

ThreadBare said:

mdiver said:




Just nail her dude! wink


nah. not my overriding interest. looking for something permanent.

I try to shun fornicative ways.

plus i like her family.



See the wink?

And i guess that means you are not too confident in your performance wink

See it again?
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Reply #16 posted 03/31/07 4:41pm

ThreadBare

LleeLlee said:

ThreadBare said:

So, I have this female friend who for the past year has done her best to stay on my radar.

Usually she was her most vocal when I was dating someone else. And, recently a mutual friend of ours started teasing us about each other. I was like, "Dude, stay out of my business. We're friends."

#1) I'm straight-up with other women, if I'm seeing somebody. I don't like drama, and I certainly don't want folks think I'm the two-timing type. Because, I'm not.

#2) That said, I hate confusion. So, I thought it worth clearing the air with my friend. And, since I don't believe in holding "disloyal/shady" conversations when I'm seeing someone, I waited until being on the outs with my g/f to clear the air with the friend.

She, of course, owned up to paying me a bunch of compliments and such and to thinking there might be some interest on my part. But said that she would prefer we remain friends. Which is cool with me; I really just wanted to clear the air (and, that's not a male ego wailing -- it's the truth).

But, my question is: Why do women work so hard to get on a dude's radar and then bail, when you call them on it?

I chalk it up to immaturity, but I'd appreciate some more perspective. Preferrably from you women-folk... hmm



.
[Edited 3/31/07 16:28pm]


what do you mean? She disliked all your girlfriends?


No, but she had a habit of suggesting leisurely strolls and movies and watching the game at her house, when she (likely) knows I'm seeing someone. Again, all with her admitted thought that I might be interested in her.

I'm thinking it's an ambivalence-immaturity thing, where people only mildly interested in someone find that person significantly more attractive when they're off the market.
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Reply #17 posted 03/31/07 4:42pm

REDFEATHERS

avatar

ThreadBare said:

REDFEATHERS said:




yes I agree.. and maybe she just loves you as a friend, but a bit more so than other male friends.. or maybe she is just standing back.. now to give you the space you need, cos she does respect your wishes

Or you have too big an ego and she is just being genuinely friendly but you have taken it the other way

OR she really believes in time to come you and her could have something

Or maybe she is just a lesbian and is after your g/f and doesnt wanna hurt you..

lol


no, she was clear about not being interested in leaving the placid suburb of Platonia for the bustling metropolis of Heartsville. (bear with me. I'm working on a book and just wanted to see that in print...)


.
[Edited 3/31/07 16:39pm]



Now I am confused..

can you explain again all in emoticons in orgnote..? batting eyes
I will love you forever and you will never be forgotten - L.A.F. heart
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Reply #18 posted 03/31/07 4:43pm

ThreadBare

mdiver said:

ThreadBare said:



nah. not my overriding interest. looking for something permanent.

I try to shun fornicative ways.

plus i like her family.



See the wink?

And i guess that means you are not too confident in your performance wink

See it again?


Dude, my confidence in that area... lol ... I'm fine. lol
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Reply #19 posted 03/31/07 4:45pm

mdiver

ThreadBare said:

mdiver said:




See the wink?

And i guess that means you are not too confident in your performance wink

See it again?


Dude, my confidence in that area... lol ... I'm fine. lol


woot!
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Reply #20 posted 03/31/07 4:46pm

ThreadBare

REDFEATHERS said:

ThreadBare said:



no, she was clear about not being interested in leaving the placid suburb of Platonia for the bustling metropolis of Heartsville. (bear with me. I'm working on a book and just wanted to see that in print...)


.
[Edited 3/31/07 16:39pm]



Now I am confused..

can you explain again all in emoticons in orgnote..? batting eyes


Red, for the love of small puppies and all that is holy, for the last time, I am not the guy in this picture!!!



We look nothing alike!!!
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Reply #21 posted 03/31/07 4:47pm

REDFEATHERS

avatar

ThreadBare said:

REDFEATHERS said:




Now I am confused..

can you explain again all in emoticons in orgnote..? batting eyes


Red, for the love of small puppies and all that is holy, for the last time, I am not the guy in this picture!!!



We look nothing alike!!!



hmmm


you are teasing again!

razz
I will love you forever and you will never be forgotten - L.A.F. heart
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Reply #22 posted 03/31/07 4:49pm

ThreadBare

REDFEATHERS said:

ThreadBare said:



Red, for the love of small puppies and all that is holy, for the last time, I am not the guy in this picture!!!



We look nothing alike!!!



hmmm


you are teasing again!

razz



wall
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Reply #23 posted 03/31/07 4:50pm

REDFEATHERS

avatar

ThreadBare said:

REDFEATHERS said:




hmmm


you are teasing again!

razz



wall



Ok just orgnote me your real pic and we can kisses and make up.. wink
I will love you forever and you will never be forgotten - L.A.F. heart
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Reply #24 posted 03/31/07 4:50pm

ZombieKitten

ThreadBare said:

REDFEATHERS said:




hmmm


you are teasing again!

razz



wall


Red it's not him, TB is actually HOT, not like this guy wacky
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Reply #25 posted 03/31/07 4:51pm

LleeLlee

ThreadBare said:

LleeLlee said:



what do you mean? She disliked all your girlfriends?


No, but she had a habit of suggesting leisurely strolls and movies and watching the game at her house, when she (likely) knows I'm seeing someone. Again, all with her admitted thought that I might be interested in her.

I'm thinking it's an ambivalence-immaturity thing, where people only mildly interested in someone find that person significantly more attractive when they're off the market.



The thing is, the clearing the air conversation, it depends if you told her you just want to be friends, she might have said the same if she thinks you're not interested.
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Reply #26 posted 03/31/07 4:51pm

ZombieKitten

LleeLlee said:

ThreadBare said:



No, but she had a habit of suggesting leisurely strolls and movies and watching the game at her house, when she (likely) knows I'm seeing someone. Again, all with her admitted thought that I might be interested in her.

I'm thinking it's an ambivalence-immaturity thing, where people only mildly interested in someone find that person significantly more attractive when they're off the market.



The thing is, the clearing the air conversation, it depends if you told her you just want to be friends, she might have said the same if she thinks you're not interested.


like saving face?
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Reply #27 posted 03/31/07 4:52pm

LleeLlee

ZombieKitten said:

LleeLlee said:




The thing is, the clearing the air conversation, it depends if you told her you just want to be friends, she might have said the same if she thinks you're not interested.


like saving face?



Yeah. i typed out saving face then deleted it. lol
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Reply #28 posted 03/31/07 4:53pm

ZombieKitten

LleeLlee said:

ZombieKitten said:



like saving face?



Yeah. i typed out saving face then deleted it. lol

falloff
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Reply #29 posted 03/31/07 4:55pm

LleeLlee

ZombieKitten said:

LleeLlee said:




Yeah. i typed out saving face then deleted it. lol

falloff



Thready seems like a nice guy, dunno why she's being all coy if she likes him. She should bake him a cake.
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