when i hit 14 i beat my older brother with a broom handle
because he was a vicious bully, we still dont talk to this day and i am over 30

he never bullied me after that

but i lived with that stick for loooong time
[Edited 3/19/07 4:43am]

my brother was bullying and teasing me and i was so mad, I picked up his cricket bat and smashed every window in my dads greenhouse

i kicked a little boy in the face when i was wearing clogs.. why cos I could
but i was staying at a friends house and his mum came round to complain.. i was in tears sitting on the stairs listening to the conversation at the front dorr, i thought the police were gonna take me away and i wet my pants

i threw an apple core at this stupid girl at school, she ducked and it hit Sister Aiden

i used to put EVERTHING down the toilet when i was little, my dolls, dressing gown, anything I could .. the toilet always flooded the bathroom and I blocked all the pipes

when i was 4 and at kindergarten it was raining at playtime, so me and my best friend took off our socks and shoes and danced bare feet in the mud

I got my first cassette player/recorder and me and my brother created a soap opera on cassette about Johnny and Loretta. They had a fight and Johnny slapped Loretta. I used bologna slapped down on our kitchen counter to simulate a slap to the face. My oldest sister still laughs to this day about that. It WAS funny. I guess I was a Foley Artist and didn't even know it back in the day.

I climbed my Mums bookcase once.. thought I was moutaineering or something lol.. knocked over an expensive ornament - her favorite

damn I was always getting in trouble.. but i was cute

In preschool,Cut my celebrity dolls' hair when they're real life counterparts would and be pisseed when the dolls hair didn't grow back like in real life. I also used to dress up for tv awards shows with my barbie dolls and watch them while drinking Canada Dry Ginger Ale (that was my champagne) and sliced Snickers on a china plate (my measly attempt at a truffle)!!!! A fabulous time was had by all.

Kindergarden-Obsessively sniff colored toilet paper fresh out of the package and look for the name of the perfume I thought they were using somewhere on the plastic wrapping.

1st grade I spent weekends obsessively engaging in a creative exercise I learned at Footpath Dance Company: pull out a picture of a painting from my kiddie encyclopedia, pick a song off of any record that said the word 'classical' on it even tho I couldn't pronounce the composition, and choreograph a piece to it. Outside of school I went through a period where I refused to where anything other than a leotard, tights& legwarmers, one of my momma's groovy 70's shawls as a skirt, and jazz shoes. OH, and then pile LOADS of her turquois jewelry that I obviousy couldn't wear outside of the house, haha. With my hair pulled back so tight in the most severe bun I looked like I had that plastic surgery 'surprised look' at age SIX.

First grade I decided I wanted to be reporter, I walked around with a tape recorder and asked adults stupid questions about their jobs and why they were inportant to 'the kids', at my stage teacher's, uh I mean, um favorite teacher's urging, I interviewed a circuit judge and asked her what she was gonna do to bullies, and my best friend's dad cause the sonnamab**** was running for governor and I was like 'my parents aren't rich, what can you do to help people like them because you guys are obviously alright' I wouldn't help his campaign at our elementary school(they had a kiddie drive) til he came up with a satisfactory answer either. Needless to say it put my relationaship and saturday nite sleepovers with my best friend under much duress for a minute, but eventually we came out a'ight.

Mix my mothers Avon creams and perfumed powders like witches cococtions so I could cast love spells on boys I had crushes on in 3rd grade. I didn't understand that witchcraft should be used for good things and not about interfering with free will back then

Write and direct musicals in fourth grade. We had rehearsals on the school bus on the way to and from home. I bargained assembly time with the administration in excange for tutoring and keeping the honors students grade avergae above 3.7 come report card time. I arranged 'after show parties' for the 'cast' again on the bus, and we'd switch up on who was bringin the koolaide and cookies.

Scrape the filling out of oreos and eat the cookies separately. Talk about a sugar buzz!

Run out of the room every time I saw an Issac Hayes album cause he scared the hell out of me with that bald head and those big dark sunglasses.

estelle81 said:

OMG you were so fly!!!I LOVE that

Ottensen said:

u betta run



what is scary about isaac hayes?

Me and my brother were visiting our oldest brother one summer out in Denver Colorado. He had a big backyard with a hill. We made this river from the top of the hill to the bottom with a lake we called Tennis Shoe Lake because it was somewhat shaped like a shoe...in the mud.
We'd float stuff down the river to the lake.

Now you must all be purified in the waters of Tennis Shoe Lake.

Ground up a "fisherman's friend" and snorted it when I was 12

I didn't get high but it sorted out my sinuses for about a year

I killed my grandma's fish a mere 20 years ago with cutlets I was trying to feed it, and she still doesn't forget to remind me

when i was about 4 or 5 i tried to ride a tricycle down the stairs . i thought i would fly. i still have the scar on my chin from the stiches

brownsugar said:

Ouch!

psychodelicide said:

yeah, but it was fun.

brownsugar said:

Ribbed4UrPleasure said:

That could have had some unpleasant results!

UCantHavaDaMango said:

my parents bought me a chemistry set for christmas. i mixed up all kinds of shit. burned a few holes, stained a few blankets and carpets....

Speaking of mixing chemicals, my brothers used to do that. I remember one time I was home alone with my brother, and I smelled something burning. I said to my brother, "What's that burning smell?" We went down into the basement, and one of my brother's chemical concoctions had caught fire. We managed to put the fire out before too much damage was done, but the table that the mixture was on still has burn marks on it.

brownsugar said:

dang...that reminds me, me and my nieces would slide down carpeted staircases on our butts. it was fun, but damn it hurt.

another weird thing i did when i was little: i used to eat the sulphur off of matches. my folks would have to hide their matchbooks from me because of that... it turns out that my mom had the exact same habit when she was a little girl, so i guess i inherited it from her.

Ottensen said:

brownsugar said:

i had gotten a cheap little chemistry set...dunno how i got it, prolly from a social worker or whoever. anyway, it didn't interest me at all so i never toyed with it. i was the kinda kid who would go all giddy if you gave me a new box of markers with a sketchbook or a pack of blank tapes (i used to dub songs off of the radio with my tape player all the time).

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

Oh yes, art supplies were always my favorite gift! ( And model horses. I was one of those little girls obsessed with horses) Blank, white paper was more precious than gold to me. Drawing on notebook paper blows.

Blank tapes were a must when I was a teenager. I would record Prince songs off the radio because I didn't have the money to buy his albums! I had to wait until Christmas to get official copies.

Tryin' to jump off the roof of a shed with an umbrella thinkin' I'm gonna float down like the Penguin or Mary Poppins. It's a wonder I didn't break my neck.

mistermcgee said:

I shouldn't laugh, because you could have been seriously injured, but that is funny! Some kids at my day care tried to do that too. Needless to say, it didn't work. I was never that gutsy as a kid.

LittleSmedley said:

FunkMistress said:

mistermcgee said:

omg my sister and I used to do that too, she would read out the story and I would make the sounds. When the prince sliced off the dragons head we bounced a basketball on the ground.

1) I use to lean on the table with my dinner on it to see how far the table would go before all the food fell on the floor. Usually, I always ended up all mixed up in my food on the floor. I got yelled at for doing that.

2) I use to mix up glue, holes from hole punchers (when you use the whole puncher to put those three-ring holes in the paper...well the i used the holes) and other shredded paper and called it oatmeal...i use to pretend that i was cooking with my kitchen play set. Unfortunately i had to keep picking the stuff out of the play pots and pans so that I could do it all over again.

3) I use to take change off of my grandmother's dresser and drop it behind furniture in her house. My cousin was accused of stealing money off of my grandmother's dresser, when it was really me who was taking the change without anyone knowing it. Somehow i got found out when tons of change was found behind couches, dressers, etc.

mistermcgee said:

Me and my grandmother had a riproaring evening playing with the cassetter recorder and trying to recite "The Night Before Christmas". It was all chopped into pieces and we were recording on top of each other and improvising. I was in absolute stitches. I don't think I've ever laughed so hard in my life.

A radio producer was born.

I used to also play SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN with my friend....well he thought that's what we were playing....I was playing Bionic Woman....


M