You know that guy who won't hold the elevator open when they see you approaching. That's me. I have come to grips that I really don't like to share elevators and so any time I get the opportunity to ride solo I take it. If that means looking up at the sky and whistling as the unfortunate individual comes streaking toward the elevator so be it. If I am lucky enough to be alone, the moment I am in, I am pushing that door close button with wild abandon.

The reasons why are twofold:

1) I am not good at the elevator small talk, the whole, "So how you doing?" thing. It's an elevator and if I am in a building that I am not likely to go back to, I am not going to use the 20 seconds of confined space to make a lifelong friend. In the vast majority of cases I am never going to see this person again.

2) If, on the slight chance, the elevator breaks down and our cries for help are ignored and we are stuck there for days or even weeks, I am afraid my elevator companion will try to eat me. I realize that this is an unlikely scenario but I'm sure somewhere in the world in some elevator it happens every day. Or maybe every other day but still.

I think these are valid reasons. I just want to apologize in advance for anyone I may shut out of the elevator at a later date.

Sad thread, but I'm in your boat.

INSATIABLE said:

I love you but your a retard.

INSATIABLE said:

If I did have a boat I would probably be the same way. I would sail off while people were running down the pier going "Wait, dude!"

I blame my kindergarten teacher for not instilling in me the proper sharing skills.

GottaLetitgo said:

me too. i don't like being trapped in there with strangers. i've been known to dart off the 'vator if someone gets on and i get a creepy vibe from them

See if I ever get into an elevator with any of you!

Muse2NOPharaoh said:

Yo, I totally puked in an elevator at AC, and the people couldn't get out QUICK enough. It was so awesome.

SureThing said:

I will the spontaneous vomiting technique the next time if someone is able to slip through my elevator force field.

SureThing said:

REALLY wont be gettin in one with you!

XxAxX said:

Forget the posted weight limit...elevators were created to cart one person at a time and one person only.

O.K - I feel you're overreacting for the following reasons: -

1. Why on EARTH would you want to make small talk with a stranger in an elevator? Go the British way and ignore them. People who talk to you in the lift are psycho's or elderly.

2. You should think yourself lucky if you find yourself in an elevator that breaks down and someone wants to eat you. Isn't that like a porno dream?

3. WTF have you done with your kitten avatar - I miss it.

I will gladly hold the door open for elderly people and parents with a small child...and of course a hot guy. The rest of y'all can take the f'ing stairs.

Is this so you can pass gas on the elevator in private?

Muse2NOPharaoh said:

Yeah, it really WAS cool thouhg. Ya had to be there. I knew I was gonna, cuz I was over drank, and I was backing my husband into a corner, and he was like, GET AWAY FORM ME, and the whole elevator could see I was trying no to puke. And just as the door was ready to open, PROJECTILE VOMIT.

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

The people were fucking hysterically trying to get out of there.

sj1600 said:

well, Gotta lives in SC, so between the lobby and the 4th floor, people will tell you who their grandma was, where they went to school and with whom and what their kid had for breakfast. and of course they want you to reciprocate.

sj1600 said:[quote]O.K - I feel you're overreacting for the following reasons: -



My wife notwithstanding, I attract psychos and old people can't get enough of me.



By eat, I meant the Hannibal Lecter route but alas the porno dream part of my brain has withered to the size of a raisin.



I often will change my avatar just for the Org Notes. Just kidding (eyes shifting, side to side).

IrresistibleB1tch said:

I see, God, I'm so British. I need to know someone for at least a year before we start acknowledging each other in the street with a slight nod that's almost imperceptible to the naked eye.

Ok..Im not one to talk to people in an elevator.
I will hold the door if you're near,but dont expect me to wait all day for you.

But if you see me walking towards the elevator and you close the door
I will stalk your ass and make you regret your actions!

TMPletz said:

No. But I could see how one would interpret as such, since that seems to be one of the most popular pasttimes of the elevator experience. It is right behind eating people you are trapped on the elevator with.

IrresistibleB1tch said:

Amen. The people down here are way to chatty. It can be like an Andy Griffith reunion in the elevators.

ThreadCula said:

I probably have a lot of stalkers I don't even know about if that is the case.

GottaLetitgo said:

I'm a total elevator bitch. Not only will I not hold the door, but I will even push the "close door" button if possible. Cause you know it's the slow ass, chit-chatty people that always want you to hold it for them.

I also hate when the doors open on a different floor and the people waiting ask, "Is this going up? or down?" Pay attention people: if the light above the car is white that means it's going up, red means down. Or if the light on the call button you pushed went off that means it's going in your direction. But the worst is when you're on the ground floor and they do that shit. There is no more down, obviously!

sj1600 said:

i hear ya - i grew up in Germany and moved to Spartanburg (!), South Carolina when i was 20. talk about culture shock!

jone70 said:

Elevator hoarders of the world unite!

GottaLetitgo said:

Although at work, I mostly take the stairs b/c I'm only going up or down one or two flights and the elevators are like molasses in January. (And my apartment is a 4th floor walk up.)

IrresistibleB1tch said:

I moved from the South of England to the Midlands and had a similar experience, talking at bus stops - what is that about,

i dont hold the elevator for anybody either..unless i know them. usually i just let the door slowly close and pretend i dont see them. i'm not worried about them talking to me because generally i'm a mute on the elevator, i just dont want them to get on and press a floor before mine and i have to wait i know its sad!

GottaLetitgo said:

ha! a true story! just this past lunch break i was going down to the street level in the elevator when the dang car stopped at the 5th floor (the very WORST floor in this building for chatty, scattered types (bless them)) and sure enough, two people got on, a man who stepped into the back of the elevator and a woman, who refused to board entirely and instead stood half on the 'vator and half off, blocking the door from closing and holding up the entire car while she finished her conversation with someone who was standing in the lobby.

people, PLEASE! either get your ass onto the elevator and let the door close promptly behind you or stay off the thing entirely while you continue that fascinating conversation about your shoes on your own time.

thanks in advance! that is all

jone70 said:

Does that button actually do anything? I swear the times I've hit that button on elevators that it still closes the doors whenever it is supposed to and not when I want it to. I'm starting to think the button is instead connected to a counting device to see how many times people push it in a day.