May whatever sense of higher power you know, be it God, Buddha, etc. be your strength and give you a sense of peace, a heart of courage.

for Anx's Grandmother.

praying for you and your family, man.

I'm sorry for your loss

My thoughts and prayers are with you., sorry for your loss.

nuff said...

you know where we are if you need us


4 nana

Oh Anx I'm sorry to hear that. My grandma also died right around Christmas time. I know how empty that feeling is.

I will save all specific updates to be posted at Anx's discretion.

But I know folks here are thinking of him and he's totally 'off the grid' still...

As of last night, he was sounding pretty good. Logistics for the funeral yesterday came together surprisingly well and he made it through the day. He'll be away for a few more days still, so let's all keep hoping that those go alright.

endorphin74 said:

..thanks for touching base with us..I'll continue to say a prayer for Anx .

Anx ... my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

x

Lots of hugs to you mate.

Thinking of you Anx. "Be the water".

And my wishes for your grandmother:

Like the empty sky it has no boundaries,
Yet it is right in this place, ever profound and clear.
When you seek to know it, you cannot see it.
You cannot take hold of it,
But you cannot lose it.
In not being able to get it, you get it.
When you are silent, it speaks;
When you speak, it is silent.
The great gate is wide open to bestow alms,
And no crowd is blocking the way.
~ from the Cheng-tao Ke, by Hsüan-chüeh

May her way be clear and boundless, and may she soar with the eagles, and bloom with the daisies. And may she ever be as the water.

I have never lost anyone near to me, or experienced death in the family.
At the same time a friend of mine lost her grandfather and another friend lost her uncle, who were both really important to them.
And when they inform me - I just don't know what to say to them..

I guess this is the best I can say: (lots of love)

I am so sorry for your loss....my heart and prayers are with you and your mom.

Sorry to hear about her passing, you have my deepest heartfelt condolences brotha. The endless cycle of life continues... You now have the legacy to continue along its path.

Peace Brotha

Thinking about you, Christopher.

As Dex has stated, you now live the legacy. That will keep you going. Don't turn away from the grieving process. You need to go through it or it will manifest in other ways. Believe me, I know.

Embrace your mother because no matter how old you are, losing a parent is hard.

and simply pray.


much love to you....

My Condolences.

Thinking about you.

It sucks to lose grandparents. It might be very natural, but it's still weird and sad. Good thing you posted something on the org. This place can be very warm at times, when needed.

Thanks for all the very cool words you guys left while I've been gone. It was a weird week and a very hectic one, but I'm back home and very happy to be home and EXTREMELY happy the holidays are over and I can reclaim all my regular routines and rituals, which is what I think I need more than anything else right now.

I am still processing my week, so I'm not quite ready to go into details just yet. The funeral was a gentle experience, my mom is doing okay, I'm doing okay, and I feel a little stronger having survived the whole experience.

More later.

Anx said:

Loves ya.

Anx said:

Thanks for checking in.

Anx said:

Glad you're doing well, hon. I've been thinking of you.

this just goes to show that life is precious,also unpredictable.
i would like to say something about chris:

i'm sure that many, if not all of us made our connections here musically and otherwise..sometimes it's about adding that "extra touch" in what we say, create or do that makes all the difference in the world.when my music collection was budding chris was one of the few people who helped it along.i noticed the fonts he used and that stood out to me.You are truly an artist with a witty repartee to match.that's your gift as i see it.yes, you've inspired me to step up my "label-making" game a little more.so publicly, i just want to say thank you for your artistic eye and wit.

Sincerely,
Mercedes "TheFemaleNumber6"

i just saw this

I'm sorry to hear this. Hope you're doing better now. You're lucky that you were close to her, though. My grandparents live 2 and 3000 miles away, respectively, and while I feel close to them, I never spent that much time with them.

Somehow when my grandfather died, I felt like I'd already processed the feeling in a letter I'd written to him a year before. It was as if I'd come to terms with his imminent death while writing it. His actual death was oddly unaffecting (probably due in part to his geographic distance from me). My lack of feeling almost hurt more than the death itself. And I wasn't able to go to the funeral--it was too soon and too far. It's almost like it never happened.

I wonder if that's how I deal with things--by ignoring them until they hit me one night 20 years later.

TheFemaleNumber6 said:

awww heck, thanks

and with the artsy labelmaking stuff, it's just something that brings me enjoyment. i love designing comp CDs for people and taking my time to put together something i hope they'll like. taking that extra step is as much for my benefit as it is for the person i'm making it for, and i hope you have as much fun.

NDRU said:

well, like i said earlier in this thread, i had a complicated relationship with my grandmother. i was both close to and distant from her. when i was a child, she was almost as much of a parent to me as my mother (she lived next door to us when i was growing up); by the same token, she was a kind of eccentric and angry woman with whom i had a hard time really connecting with as i got older. i do have my own memories, though, and my own good reflections. my mother had a much more substantial relationship with her, obviously, and i think that's where the loss is greatest. as for me, i don't think there's a timetable for processing the death of a family member or loved one. you spend your whole life remembering and feeling things and missing the person. eventually, those feelings just blend in with all the other feelings we have to process every day. that's my theory, anyway.

Anx said:

It is a complicated realtionship we have with them, probably because of the age divide combined with the familial closeness. They're alternately very similar to us and very different. As different as our parents' perspective is, grandparents' are exponentially moreso.

I think you're right, the processing happens all the time. My grandmother remarried, and while we were all really happy for her and the guy is really cool, I can only think "he's not my grandfather" when I'm with him. Not in a bitter way, but it's a sense of loss.