REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With consent..... 12 Calories
Without consent..... 187 Calories

OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands..... 8 Calories
With one hand..... 12 Calories
With your teeth..... 85 Calories

PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection..... 6 Calories
Without an erection..... 315 Calories

PRELIMINARIES:
Trying to find the clitoris..... 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-Spot..... 92 Calories

POSITIONS:
Missionary..... 12 Calories
69 lying down..... 78 Calories
69 standing up..... 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow..... 216 Calories
Doggy Style..... 326 Calories
Italian chandelier..... 912 Calories

ORGASM:
Real..... 112 Calories
False..... 315 Calories

POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging..... 18 Calories
Getting up immediately..... 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately..... 816 Calories

GETTING A SECOND ERECTION:
If you are:
20-29 years old..... 36 Calories
30-39 years..... 80 Calories
40-49 years..... 124 Calories
50-59 years..... 972 Calories
60-69 years..... 2916 Calories
70 and over.....Death

DRESSING AFTERWARDS:
Calmly..... 32 Calories
In a hurry..... 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door... 1218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door.... 3521 Calories

begging for 4 hours (my version of foreplay): 200 calories

what's "italian chandalier"?

hokie1 said:

thats what im sayin..
Im gettin off now but when I get back..I WANT AN ANSWER!!

DanceWme said:

http://www.sexualposition...akait.html

ThreadCula said:

Why the hell are they using jointed wooden people to demonstrate sex positions? And, that doesn't look worth the calories AT ALL!

This is awesome! Why don't they include this in fitness magazines?

hokie1 said:

Is this list accurate?

Fighting over who gets the wet patch - 20 calories

physcially moving the pool table to fuck on..- 50 calories

hokie1 said:

What the hell is sex?

IAintTheOne said:

"Italian Chandalier" is simply doing it from behind, with both people facing the ceiling, with the woman lying on top of the man.

I've been doing that one for years. It's fun. Plus, your hands have easy access 2 the woman's clit, and there's nothing wrong with dual stimulation...

ThreadCula said:

I just can't make sense of that at all. Which one is the woman there?

minneapolisgenius said:

The one without the "woodie"

baaahhahhaaa!

I know that was a bad one.

IAintTheOne said:

My pool table weighs over a ton (seriously!)...built in 1914 and has three 300 pound 1 1/2 inch slates that make up the surface. It'd take a hell of a lot more than 50 calories!

Stymie said:

Stymie said:

that's what I was wondering too!

jerseykrs said:

"Italian Chandalier" is simply doing it from behind, with both people facing the ceiling, with the woman lying on top of the man.

I've been doing that one for years. It's fun. Plus, your hands have easy access 2 the woman's clit, and there's nothing wrong with dual stimulation...

Not getting a hard-on - zero calories

novabrkr said:

The bunny's back!!!!

Stymie said: