I woke up this morning, to find a message on my phone from my mother-in-law to call her right away. She was at the hospital all night with her son and his wife.

Apparently, my sister-in-law was drunk and cut her wrists while my brother-in-law was at work and only their 16 year old daughter was home. My niece found her mother in the bathroom passed out with blood all over her. She frantically called the police and then her dad at work and then her grandma down the street. Poor girl. She was even trying to kick her mother to make her get up.

She was talking incoherently at the hospital last night, saying stuff like she's tired...she's done all she can do. My brother-in-law is mad and was yelling at her because he blames it all on her out of control drinking.

She has a pretty good job for someone who only has their GED. They only have one kid. My brother-in-law makes decent money at a hard job. He loves that woman like crazy. She's done a lot of dirt to him, and he still stays with her. They own a house, drive nice cars. They even just back from a cruise. I don't even mess with her anymore because every time I would go around her, she would be drinking, then end up insulting me in some way.

Anway, she ended up getting 20 stitches in her wrist and the hospital told her that they are not releasing her. Either she commits herself to the psych ward, or they are getting a court order to keep her there. She needs help. She's only 33. But she's been drinking as long as I've know her (since she's been 15--we went to school together too).

I feel for your family, I really do, and anyone who gets themselves in that sorry state deserves a lot of support

But thats a shitty, SHITTY thing to do to your own child.

susannah said:

Sorry if that was a bit harsh.... Its just people dont think about other peoples reactions when they do this sort of thing, often people that they love.

I hope she gets well

susannah said:

That's ok. That's what I said to my husband when I told him about it this morning too..."Isn't that an awful thing to do to their daughter?" Can you imagine how scared she must have been?

I'm telling you, that woman drinks a bottle of hard liquor every damn day. She's drunk all of the time. The last time I talked to her was about a year and a half ago. She called me out of the blue to yell at me about some shit that she doesn't even have a clue about. I figured she was drunk, but told myself I was done with her at that point.

dustysgirl said:

See, I don't have a problem with that, I mean get her some help yeah, but it'll be ok. I juat can't get over the selfishness of doing something like that to ensure that people will find you. Why put someone else through that? I get that that you're not feeling at your strongest but you don't have to hurt other people. Especially your children/spouse/parents - who 9 times out of ten didnt see it coming. Its not fair.

Ok Ill step off my soapbox now. I hope she can be brought through this

I'm so sorry. It must have been a shock for the whole family and adds extra pressure all round, particularly for your niece.

I think that desperate actions such as these are not borne out of rational thinking and we therefore can't be too judgemental about what happened on the night, even though her actions do apparently sound "selfish".

Whether drink influenced her decision to attempt suicide or not, it's clear she is unhappy and needs help. Perhaps there are things going on in her life that none of you are aware of. She may not be pleasant to be around because of her drink problem but that is likely to be a symptom rather than a cause of her problems.

I really hope that she gets the help she needs and that, as a family you can all come together to support her, which I'm sure you will do as you sound very close. It does sound as though she needs to control her drinking but I'm sure there are other things going on behind the scenes, or further back in her life that need addressing too.

My thoughts are with you and yours.

x

Reincarnate said:

couldn't have said it any better...

regardless of how much someone's life sucks, Suicide is never an option, its the punk's way out, now trust me, iv'e thought of suicide more than enough times to scare myself.

but you rise above that shit. im sorry for your sister in law, but one day she will realize that it was not the best idea.

I hope her family ... and she

gets the help they need

soon

bitch slap her.

bucketofbouncyballs said:

now wait, thats not even an option either thats a lil insensitive dontcha think?

no...I have a cousin who tried killing her self like three times. I have a friend, who tried killling her self a whole bunch of times. What bothers me most, is having children in this situation. You don't bring your child into something like that. My cousin has two kids two babies no less and they found her all messed up. Its irritating. And well, she got bitched slapped and got her act straightened together.


p.s not being sarcastic here.
[Edited 11/28/06 5:26am]

bucketofbouncyballs said:

well granted sometimes someone does need a kick in the ass in order to get thier shit together. was just the way it was presented thats all

I hope everything works out for the better

i think i chatted about this on another post ... been a few weeks maybe ... but I was lately kinda watching that show "intervention" ... and ... when alot of these people (i dont wanna go out on a limb and say EVERYONE of these people) are addicted to stuff - whether alcohol, heroin, meth .. whatever ... it always seems that there is something SERIOUS in their past that has made them "feel hopeless" etc ... she needs counseling ... to realize this .... in some odd ways ... when she realizes WHY she drinks ... or feels the way she does ... she will want to get help ...

sad thing for that kid was she was living that every day
she has probably seen a lot of stuff we never want our kids to experience.
i hope that they can all heal their wounds - both literally and figuratively.

and for you too dusty

Dusty, you're going through a lot right now and I'm sorry for that. I hope you and your family find the peace you really deserve
[Edited 11/28/06 10:30am]

i hope she gets better
but she won't with people yelling @ her and blaming her.
jus sayin, if anything she'll get worse, and then what?

perhaps the whole family needs to go into therapy...it's not just about her, but about the people around her.

purplerein said:

It might just be about her..... Although you do have to question the husband who is willing to entertain this behavior and why

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

thanks Supa, that's what i was getting at..was anyone else in the family enabling her to continue this behaviour

I don't know why my brother-in-law puts up with her crap...the heavy drinking and all that. I've been over there and seen them in some massive fights that she started because she was drunk.

She moved out a few years ago, for about a year. He was miserable. Sad and mess every time you saw him...always begging her to come back. So, she moved back in about a year ago. I heard over Thanksgiving that they just got back from a cruise. I thought everything was going all right.

I'm sure the hospital she's at will treat her alcoholism too. They'll probably bring her husband and daughter in for some sessions too. Who knows, maybe this was a blessing in disguise.

I've been trying to call my mother-in-law all day for some more info, but no answer! Argh!