I think Im done with my relationship , I dont know ? I dont know if Im afraid of being by myself - as pathetic as that sounds .

We have been together a very long time , Im still crazy about him after 14 years but feel so very very lonely .

He is controlling , he has " misbehaved " online touting himself on single and personal sites etc which has absolutely pulled the rug out from under my feet .

He knows how much I hate it but he says its harmless fun and wont stop when I asked .

He belittles me at every opportunity , makes me feel ugly

UGH enough complaining , I just dont know where to go

Pochacco said:

Babe, read over that and realize you've answered yourself!

cut your losses, and get rid of him. you need to boost your self image. you can do it.

INSATIABLE said:

For sure.

YOU are worth more and deserve so much better.

Pochacco said:

you know my view on this, Pete...

above all, just be true to yourself and follow your instincts

PS-I'm only an orgnote away.

Thanks everyone , stupid thing I still love him But the past year or so has been too much hard work , Ive given it my all I really have .

Maybe in the coming months I will find myself in a better financial position to make the necessary changes

purplerein said:

IrresistibleB1tch said:

He sounds like real gentleman

Borat said:

Pochacco is great and deserves better!

dump that zero and get with a hero....not only for yourself but for your sanity....

You're aging yourself with the guy....14 years??? Pull yourself up by your bootstraps and find a way to cut loose.

What's the financial arrangement? Do you have children? Joint property, assets? If so, see an attorney.It might be easier than you think,

The guy should have LOSER tatoo'd to his forhead.

Hey gorgeous! I left my 5 year because i was being massively disrespected. You deserve better than to feel this way

Well people telling you (expecially random strangers) to leave a guy you were with for 14 years is not going to help you. You obviously know the guy is not a very nice person, so when you feel like the timeis rite, I believe you will make the move.

.....or you could just spend the rest of your life being miserable.....then die.

Pochacco said:

He is an abuser. You don't need that in your life. Do the right thing and dump him coz you don't need that crap in your life. Someone better will come along. Take the rose coloured glasses off and see it for what it really is.

Abuse warning signs: http://www.stopabuse.ca/s...signs.aspx
Types of abuse: http://www.stopabuse.ca/s...abuse.aspx

Im on the verge of walking tonight , if I do Im effectivly making myself homeless and jobless . I just cant take much more .....

Pochacco said:

DO IT. I know you've got at least one person you can stay with. Get any job, anywhere, even if you don't like it--and watch your life improve dramatically. Bag groceries, make sandwiches. It doesn't have to be a career.

Please, I'm here if you need me.

INSATIABLE said:

I know that breaking it off with someone whom you've been with for 14 years is hard, but if he belittles you and "makes you feel ugly", then it is time to let him go. You deserve better!

Pete... know you're loved ok? I'm only an hour away and you have my number

you can't take back yesterday... but you can take control of tomorrow

if you don't feel you have the strength now
i hope you can find a counselor or group to help you get to there

luv4all7 said:

yep

U deserve to be happy

Pochacco said:

i understand, but you'll be on better ground if you plan it ahead a little. unless there's violence involved of course.

make a plan, save up a little money if you can, and then make a move you know you can sustain.

IrresistibleB1tch said:

perfect advice.
Never put yourself in a worse situation