.....sometimes Org drama doesn't matter.

For those who know me and some of you that don't, I have a son who is autistic. I am faced with the very real realization that I may not be able to take care of him anymore. I talk to my friends about it but in order to deal with it, I talk to the people in a support group I have been attending for the last five years. I don't support the group as much as I should, and I don't go to group as much as I used to but they are very vital in holding me up. I started a Yahoo group for our group and I still turn to them when I am going through. Most days I feel like I can't take it anymore, but I decided to give it another try.

Today, one of the members of the Yahoo group said to me:

Dear Ivy:

I read your response and sometimes there just are no words but I felt
your love throughout the responses.

However your hope inspires me to a level that is unexplainable. Thank
you for your courage and your strength and I will remember those as I
interface with families today. It is parents like you that give
professionals like myself the passion to continue my work. I thank you
for the inspiration and sharing.

It brought me to tears because I feel like such a failure that I feel like I can't take care of him anymore.

Parents: love your children and count your blessings that they are healthy and if they are not, count your blessings anyway.

Thank You for sharing that.

Ivy... no words just a massive, big

Thank you for sharing, as always.

x 100

i can't imagine having to make that decision
but in the end, you are his mother
and mothers will do what is best for their babies


much respect

you got an orgnote.

I can't imagine going through this either. It must be so incredibly hard.

You should never consider yourself a failure because you find it overwhelming or so difficult that you feel you might not be able to care for him any longer - you are simply doing the best you can and that's all anyone can do.

i think you're doing exactly what is right for you and for your son, not to mention for your other kids as well. i'm just impressed as hell that you never gave up.

Honey, you are not Superman and you are not God. You can only do what you can do. Most of us are not and will never be in your position but I respect the fact that you are doing everything you can to make it work and if you ever come to the point where you just can't make it work anymore I will still have the hugest respect for you.

Stymie said:

Truer words have never been spoken...and those words are as beautiful as you are.

Babygirl, I know you and I know that crazy lovable boy. It isn't that you are incapable of taking care of him anymore. It's that he is at a point where one person (let alone one person who also must care for many others) cannot provide the level of care and safety that he and everyone else needs.

That says nothing about you, my darling woman. But what speaks volumes is the fact that you have hung in there this long out of pure fierce love for your child. And the decisions you're making now are being made out of that same fierce love and sense of protection.

I love you so much!

You bring tears to my eyes..

I cannot imagine the joy he gives to you, and I cannot imagine your sorrow.

I love you!

FunkMistress said:

Ivy, FM said it all right there.

ThreadBare said:

She did.

Hugs to you, Stymie...

Support groups are great.

Ivy is greater.

Thank you all. I get so bogged down in playing Superwoman that every now and then I need a reminder that I'm not invincible.

Thank you all again on behalf of Daniel Christopher.

tA

Tribal Disorder

http://www.soundclick.com...dID=182431

I can't imagine having to be in your situation...and I'm so sorry you're faced with such a decision...but, no matter the decision you make, you will make the best one out of the love you have for him...and that can never be wrong and whatever you decide to do will not mean you love him any less.

Hey you, it sounds like you are doing just fine, life is hard for everyone, sounds like you got it a bit harder, but don't give up, the rewards of spending time together are there, just remember to look for them and smile.

I commend your strengths


You sound like an awesome mom

I can't say it better than previous speakers already have, Ivy - realising this is just as hard as not realising, if not harder. Love you, and remember that not having your son at home doesn't mean he's not in all of your hearts.

Everyone has said it so eloquently already but I just want to give you a massive and tell you I think you're an amazing woman. He is very lucky to have you as his mother.

All the best, Ivy.

no words...just s

For years my son was diagnosed and eventually misdiagnosed..first with autism...then Aspergers Syndrome....it went all the way to ADD/ADHD....I know the heartache that comes from dealing with that....so my hat is off to you and all the respect in the world is yours.....

....and u are so right....cuz time on this earth is so short...and they get away so fast....

I don't know you at all, but reading this brings tears to my eyes. I have some (rather vague) experiences with autistic children and I can imagine how hard it is to love your child so much, but being in different worlds at the same time. You seem like a very strong woman, from what I read. Don't feel guilty for things you can't help. If you love him as you do, I'm sure you're making the right choices.

Love, Marie