minneapolisgenius said:

...and happy anniversary to you both!

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

Thanks!

because we fell for the ceremony... and we wanted presents! and we wanted kids to not be bastards!

but really... i would say the hassle of a divorce keeps some couples from just breaking up. it does also give legal rights and protections. just ask a gay couple about those. but like gay marriage those rights and protections can be afforded short of a marriage.

but there HAS to be some way to protect your rights...some legal means to make sure you are not taken advantage of too much.

Spats said:

actually there are significant legal benefits to being married.

which is why gay folks want the same right

XxAxX said:

Oooo Tell me more !!

What benefits are these?

myownprivateinsanity said:

you can't be this dense. you're making a joke, but what?

Spats said:

I'm getting married because I want to, not because I'm insecure. Are you really that ignorant? Would it make you feel better knowing that I'm paying for everything?

gemini13 said:

Why do you want to? What do you think you will be gaining from getting married that would would not have otherwise?

Spats said:

Why wouldn't I want to? Why do you think you must gain something in order to do something?

XxAxX said:

You're in the US ?

gemini13 said:

Well most people don't do something if they think they are going to lose something or going to be worse off.

myownprivateinsanity said:

hospital visitation rights, insurance, financial protection, family medical leave... etc. granted all of those can be dealt with short of a marriage but it would still require some legal, government recognised agreement, standard, or set of conditions... which would still have very similar strings attached as a marriage.

Spats said:

Thank you, expert.

IrresistibleB1tch said:

yeah, we had damn good cake!

Spats said:

And a lot of people don't think in the terms that you do at all. Your point? What am I going to lose, marital expert? You can't even get laid and you're trying to tell me I'm wrong. That's hilarious.

bluesbaby said:

Well the soaring divorce rate says i am correct.

Spats said:

first they are not SORARING they are the same they have been for 20+ years.


2nd you seem to be confusing the cost of a wedding with that of a marriage. a marriage cost what $20 to $50 bucks?

i dont know. for a while i've been really cynical about it. i like the idea of it i guess but i dont like the finality of it-not that i would want many partners for the rest of my life. being with just one person for a long time without getting married kind of appeals to me more. besides i need an extreme amount of space and its something that i think may be hard for some to deal with. if my husband could have his own apartment for when he pisses me off or when i just want my space then that would be great

SlamGlam said:

Thanks Slam.

I have never been married (although came extremely close once, before finding out some horrifying facts about my future bride!!! But thats another story), nor had any interest until now - We are due to get married in the next 12 - 24 Months - I really should look into stuff like this - I don't know much about our laws in the UK regarding marriage.....

I understand the list you put, except for the Hospital Visitation Rights.....Whats that about?

brownsugar said:

You made a couple good points. Marriage is not for independant people. And the thought of being with one person forever is depressing. There is no woman that lovable. Closing off your options in life is not good.

myownprivateinsanity said:

well in the US hospitals can block non family members from visiting. so if there is an unmarried couple say Sue and Jeff. if Jeff is in a coma and Jeff's parents do not like Sue they can stop her from coming to see Jeff. but if they were married the parents could not do anything to stop Sue from visiting.

SlamGlam said:

Thats awful..

I don't know if that is the same as the UK.....I am a little Naive I guess !!

Thanks again for your response.

I believe all the clishay things said about a man and a woman.

I believe a true relationship should be a partnership a teaming up.

My wife and I teamed up at a very young age. We overcame lifes little hurtels together. Often one helping the other. It's a team effort.

When we reached the age that we had agreed would be a good age to marry when we first met, several years later, and found we were still rocking the party, we made it "offical".

We get a sick pleaure seeing others with their heads up their asses who don't know the first thing about the true nature of love or relationships. Though we also find it sad.

We've tryed intructing others, but they never listen, so now we just have a private laugh when the house of cards they build comes crumbling down as it would enevabilitly.

MickG said:

Dude, you would need a polevault to get over yourself. You are not better than people who have not got married or who don't have a long term relationship.
[Edited 9/19/06 14:27pm]

Spats said:

A reponce quite simular to those given by the clueless upon getting married.

Maybe setting one self high isn't the problem as long as one knows what not to do so not to fall.

Spats said:

WOW,hold on...help me out here, why is marrige not for independant people?

7ellusion said:

Because the speaker of those words has issues in understanding the true meaning of terms.

My wife and I are very independant people, though we have teamed up in life.


I wonder what the autor of those words thinks about sports.

MickG said:

Now, that's the understanding I've always had... cause then what's being said that marriage is only for co-dependent people... it sort of reads that way.

7ellusion said:

Because you are dependant on another person for almost everything. An independant person does not need a "partner". You have to answer to that "partner" or consult with that "Partner" on everything. No independance is involved.

MickG said:

Drop the "high and mighty" stuff. Married people are not higher on the food chain then single people.
[Edited 9/19/06 20:16pm]
[Edited 9/19/06 20:18pm]