Justin1972UK said:

Hee-hee haw, J. No down-low in my mix, dude.

And, I hate how that wrinkle has changed the scene for straight dudes.

ThreadBare said:

I was joking, though the d/l phenomenon has added another layer of suspicion from women. Oh well.

mrdespues said:

That is awesome...

I’ve never been married either but I have been engaged three times, I didn’t go through with any of them because we would’ve been doing it exactly as you said for the wrong reasons. I was talking once with relatives male and female who’ve been married for 30 plus years and they all said the same as you also, that marriage wasn’t to be entered into lightly, if there were habits, idiosyncrasies, personality corks anything no matter how small that annoy, bother or have a problem with then don’t do it because you can’t change or make someone into what you want them to be. Who they are when you met them is who they’re going to be when you marry them. I don’t think many get that even though it’s been established over and over time and again, many still believe the myth “I can change them” and when they don’t they divorce.
[Edited 9/14/06 21:49pm]
[Edited 9/14/06 21:50pm]

HereToRockYourWorld said:

whoa that identically echoes my situation (except I might change the "I'm glad" part to "I think I'm glad")

heartbeatocean said:

But if you love him, why wouldn't you wanna stay married than?

Whateva said:

Because we are utterly, devastatingly INCOMPATIBLE. Marriage doesn't run on love alone, unfortunately. We come from extremely different cultures and it is obvious that our differences are UNRESOLVABLE and IRRECONCILABLE. Still like him though.

heartbeatocean said:

OK I get it, I've been there myself, I tried to stay with him after we broke up so he could stay here in this country, but living with him was just to hard.

A bit philosophical for GD eh Dex? Propose move to P&R

My response to “Why am I married” would be that I always was. The marriage or union of my wife and I happened years before the wedding sealed it legally. Now don’t get me wrong am not some super religious guy (far from it) but the marriage is there, it is a fact not a choice. The choice to become married legally, to wed, comes out of many other reasons, for me it was to show everyone I love how much I love my wife and to celebrate that with a great big party. The marriage before that day, and the marriage after that day continue and now we are a marriage of 2 + 1 and it feels wonderful. When I have time to stop and think about it

Anx said:

i wuz picturing more of the agador character from the birdcage i LUV him

I wanna get married to see my whole family pissy drunk at the reception along with boyfriend's family too. ha ha.....


My boo-bie, I think... is more ready than I am. But, we have to live in the same city first.... Working on that! But we'll be shacking up before we feel the societal urge to legally form the union.

Dex...I see your point. Women can be kinda PRESSED when it comes to meeting a marriage deadline. Being PRESSED leads to marrying who ever and then it crumbles years later. Here is something I read in "Whatever" By Beverly Mahone.. "Ladies, be careful what you pray for in your desperation to be married by a certain age". I think I'd follow that advice

Whateva said:

Did he get to stay? Luckily we baredly made it through the green card process...now that is off my shoulders.

Was tricked Only 16 at the time They promised me the life of Riley in good old jolly England. And now I run to the Cash & Carry four times a week

senik said:

omg

sweet said:

Yeah, I love him too. Chistopher is somewhat less flaming, which is too bad, but he's such a tremendous smartass, and I enjoy that SO much, that I can live without the hotpants.

I mean, unless he wants to wear hotpants. Hotpants = optional.

PREDOMINANT said:

That's the shit! That is something to think about...

heartbeatocean said:

Well I lost track of him for a while, met him again last year (after not seeing him for 12 years). After we devised he hid for a while, than he met this lady, she paid for his study and he got several jobs, they had a kid, after about 7 years in this country he wrote a letter to the conferment explaining his situation in perfect dutch.
He didn't expect anything at all but they gave him a permit in the end.
Now he has two kids and a nice job, he's lucky
[Edited 9/16/06 1:54am]

People get married because they are afraid of being alone. Insecurity. That's pretty much it. And women for whatever reason dream about when they are little girls.

Getting married is pointless because there is nothing you can do married than you cannot do unmarried. Sorry to break that to all the married people.

Spats said:

Spats said:

Erm.....You can get divorced.....

Serious comment now


We are getting married, although we kinda moved our aimed date back another year (at this rate we are gonna get married with "His and Hers" Zimmer Frames )

I don't see Marriage as a necessity, We have been together for 5 years now, so technically we are "married" in some aspects.

Why are we getting married.....Because we love each other and we want to. I don't see any other reason really??

HereToRockYourWorld said:

oh

my


god.




Now I want an anxy live-in he-maid too! He should start marketing them.

Spats said:

I agree, a little bit.

It even warns ya NOT to get married in the Bible. Your better of single.

Spats said:

Whew, I am glad all we married folk have Spats to break information to us, because we certainly could not think on our own, or act on our own, or make decisions without his sound advice and counsel on relationships. I am off to tell my husband that I only married him because I didn't want to be lonely! I am sure that will be of great comfort to him.

bluesbaby said:

Oh yes and if you're really lucky he might even wanna devorce you

bluesbaby said:

Joke all you want. But there is some insecurity there and they think marriage will correct that. Marriage is just a waste of money.

Spats said:

Good point. I'll mention that to my husband since it's our 8th anniversary today.