Alright so I was just going to let everybody know that this is the Captain's last thread. Yeah, yeah, I know...half the people in the Org have gotten up and left only to come back a few weeks later, their tail between their legs. The Captain did that himself a few months ago but I missed it so much that, there I was, a few weeks later, bringing my same wacky irreverant brand of sexually tinged humor to this site. I just registered my 1000th penis reference the other night, not bad when you consider the Captain has only had like 1500 posts.

There are a lot of things that are bringing my departure. Truth be told, the Captain never got over losing his friend Admiral. No, the Captain is not going to come out of the closet finally. The Captain is straight but is filled with admiration for the gay Orgers on this site and, if he were gay, could only wish to be as cool as them.

Othe factors include redundancy in topics, which has a lot to do with the Captain's one dimensional nature. I don't know anything else but sex. The Captain wishes he could converse about other topics but damn it, nothing else is wired into his hard drive. And the other night, I realized with my 8 billionth reference to my larger than average genitals that the Captain had crossed into self-parody. And that, my friends, is when you hang up the codpiece.

The Captain is a person but also a creation. I was created for a purpose that my creator doesn't exactly feel like he or she accomplished. That purpose metamorphosized over time and the Captain started to enjoy himself just a little too much around here instead of staying with the creator's plan. I am not trying to get all "Matrix Returns" on you (where the old guy at the end explained all that stuff and Keanu went "whoa!" and then it really had nothing to do with the third movie that sucked). Let's just say the Captain lost his way but damn it if it wasn't fun while it lasted.

I'll entertain a few responses for the remainder of this thread and then the Captain shall disappear into the Org graveyard for retired alter egos. That's cool. But the Captain knows that his legacy shall remain and when you think of hookers, porn, lesbians, or penises, you will think of CaptainChaos and smile.
[Edited 9/10/06 19:21pm]

The Captain can't die. He's like Superman... he'll be resurrected.

you're a sore loser captain

ZombieKitten said:

No, it's not about the Male Org Hottie thing. The Captain considers winning one of the greatest achievements of his Org life. Winning again would have been way too much to ask.

The Captain appreciates being able to represent the month of August, the hottest month of all.

CaptainChaos said:

Oh! OK then

coolcat said:

The Captain can and will die. The creator has decreed it.

In memoriam.

Does this have something to do with that family reunion over the summer?

The Captain always knew the Creator would take him out eventually but I was really hoping for a better story line. He should have had me marry some hot hooker name Rita or something and then moving to the Caymans. The Captain hates going out with a whimper but alas that is the case.

lazycrockett said:

No comment.

IrresistibleB1tch said:

Don't blame me. Blame the Creator. In his mind both of us cannot exist in the same place. And since I have become a repetitious disappointment to him apparently, he has chosen to kill me off. The Creator is pretty much an average hung bastard!

good stuff.

CaptainChaos said:

aren't those just the WORST!

IrresistibleB1tch said:

i was just about to say beware the envious gods

XxAxX said:

perfect!

Captain, you didn't make it to your rank by being a quitter. Toughen up!

IrresistibleB1tch said:

perhaps is the Captian were to make ritual orgasmic 'offerings' at their altars the gods would re-name this site to Captain.ORG

well, that's what *i* would do

XxAxX said:

with pics of course!

IrresistibleB1tch said:

ABsolutely

so, how about it Captain? instead of leaving the ORG, perhaps you might reconsider and just start posting naked pictures of yourself ?? just a thought

Imago, right?

CaptainChaos said:

Leaving aside the omission of the question mark , let me put y'all out of your suspense:

Do you tolerate intolerance?

Ace said:

Haha! Wow... what a blast from the past that name is!

IrresistibleB1tch said:

The Creator is VERY jealous of my package.

kidelrich said:

I'm not quitting. I'm being downsized. The Creator just feels like the Org has no more use for my kind of immature straight for the crotch humor. I think he just wants to come on and talk about sudoko or something.

XxAxX said:

The Captain is intrigued.

It would be hard to leave if it was Captain.Org...

mrdespues said:

No, but the Captain is flattered.

The Creator is someone who is not nearly as high profile as that. One of those Orgers who never really had a following or a clique. Maybe a couple of people read his or her stuff but they never really found their place in this space. So he or she created me.

Or maybe the Captain is just trying to throw you off the trail...
[Edited 9/10/06 11:19am]

CaptainChaos said:

Hey, tell your Creator I was a fan, back in the day. The otter and all... kept me smiling, even though I can't even remember why now.




.
[Edited 9/10/06 11:23am]

mrdespues said:

Did the Captain ever write anything about otters? I was drunk most of the time I posted anyway.

CaptainChaos said:

Are you drunk now? Your Creator, I said.