I get upset about things that aren't really a big deal.

Stupid shit makes me sad.

My mind races around in circles.

Sometimes I just get so tired.



I know that this shit won't last forever, and tomorrow I'll probably be fine, but I do hate feeling this way.

just wanted to share.

jerseykrs said:

thanks.

Your not alone honey.

You know when some people are sad... I feel it is sarcastic to use these little smiley face emoticons. (just how I feel) Although JasmineFire... I am wishing to send you warm hugs.

Go out and do something you enjoy and gain serenity from.

Is this about Pluto?

Let it go!!

Freespirit said:

Thank you, Freespirit and everyone who has posted on this thread.

Perhaps I've been a bit cooped up and need to get some air. it's getting late here now, we'll see what tomorrow brings.

2the9s said:

JasmineFire said:

Are you able to step outside now...sit down, close your eyes... and relax for a few minutes? Amazing how the outdoors can renew, I do this often and just did this tonight. It's cozy here.

2the9s said:

thanks to everyone except for you!
[Edited 8/25/06 21:05pm]

Sometime ago I had a terrible dream that I was riding on the subway to see someone and then at the last minute realized that this person had moved and had no idea where to find them.

So I got off the subway and tried to take another one to get back home and then realized that I no longer lived in NYC and had nowhere to go.

At the end of the dream, I was in this empty subway station not knowing what to do.


This kind of sums up my feelings right now.

I think that I will step out for a breath of fresh air now.

JasmineFire said:

I've had those kinds of dreams too...where you just lose someone for a moment and that's it. Or when, like you say, you suddenly can't remember how or where to find someone.

Or the feeling of displacement etc.

JasmineFire said:

Dammit i wish i had my freud interperation on dreams..
i could of told you what it meant.
from the guess of its almost a fear of being betrayed.

2the9s said:

it's a terrible feeling. I had that dream about a year ago and it still haunts me. I also watched Spike Lee's 'Summer of Sam' today, which may have also triggered the memory.

I also had a dream last night that I slept through the entire first day of school and got up at 8:45pm. That was pretty damn awful.

aww hun
i thought i was the only one going thru this... everyone around me has been so happy and i'm just stuck

two people close to me -- VERY CLOSE to me are both in the hospital @ the present moment...

...and as close as i am to either, i have no idea what condition they're in right now... no calls, no answers... and i'm freaking out

i'm lonely...i only have you guys here on the org now, i feel like i have NO ONE left to turn to...i cry every day and before i go to bed because i'm just so lonely.

i have done nothing wrong that i can think of, but i tend to repel people away from me...


i'm sorry, i hope you feel better tho, enjoy your weekend with people u love

SammiJ said:

damn, Sammi! That's a lot to be going through right now.

Sometimes I feel that I also repel people but really, when you think of it, it's a good thing. The people who seemed to be repelled by you are not the kind of people you really need in your life. There is no need to chase after friends, as they come to you when you need it most and least expect it.

At least that's what my life experiences have taught me. Although sometimes I tend to forget and get all out of sorts. Ah well, it's all a part of being human, I guess.

JasmineFire said:

this is my plight: how do u stop giving a fuck about the people who don't give a fuck about you?
i am by nature a caring person, someone is in need and i'll try my absolute best to make things right... i'm there for all my friends

and i mention one thing thats wrong in my life, and they walk away, or try and cloud the conversation with their no so big problems...
it hurts, and i tell them, they just don't get it

and i mean these are friends who just started acting like this since university, guess they got a chip on their shoulders now... i've known these people for almost 10 years...i dont get it, they all i had...

i have no one left now, and i haven't felt so out of place and alone in all my life - and i'm scared.

Come on people... volunteer at a local hospital... and you may see another side to your own sense of downs.
Work with children in Oncology, ICU or general Peds. The adult unit can teach you much, including learning about your own life and appreciations.

We all feel what we feel... but perhaps a change or shift in what is "common" behavior is well due.

This place, is rarely inspiring... but it can be... if you look in the right places.

...

Anyways...

SammiJ said:

that really sucks.

The way that I've dealt with that is to just let it go. It's way easier said than done, but for me it was something that just had to be done. There are people who I definitely care about more than they care about me and I can't really change it, so I just send my love to them when I feel like it and don't even think about whether or not they will reciprocate. Sometimes I get pleasantly surprised and sometimes I don't BUT if I don't expect anything, then I can't get disappointed. It doesn't work 100% of the time but it's helped me out for the most part.

I've always felt like I'm on the outside of everything, for various reasons. Nothing good ever came out of me actively trying to change that, so I just act like myself. It took me awhile to get that way but it's been the best thing I've ever done. I have the most eclectic bunch of friends. They're scattered, but they are my lifelines.


P.S. You will get through this.
[Edited 8/25/06 22:13pm]

JasmineFire said:

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.!

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

Freespirit said:

Ok.

You know Jasmine... you are wise beyond your years...

Expectations can be the death of us all. Valuable words you mentioned and yes, easier said than done. It's a comittment most definitely, when wishing to alter our perceptions, but if conditioned enough, strangely... it does become who we aspire to be in a solidity moral state of being.

Time and a lot of time it will take to undergo this type of transformation, no short-cut in this 'real live world' exists.

I wish the world was not as sad as it is... it is an individual battle.

Mach said:

Freespirit said:

Thank you, Julie. That means a lot to me.

JasmineFire said:

Are you living inside of my head? Because I've been feeling the same way too lately. I hope you feel better soon.

JasmineFire said:

i'm a little frustrated right now too. and sometimes things can get you down when you dwell on them. just know that it doesnt last and it gets better. im sure by now you feel better.

SammiJ said:

Mach said:

This is SO true!
I wish I had a better understanding of this years ago

ThreadCula said:

man if i thought about this ten years ago....