Question: Once it has been a while since you and your ex broke up, and you were hurt as a result of the other person who caused the breakup (he/she may had been hurt too)...if they apologize and give a reasonable explanation of the situation, is it okay to forgive them?

IMO, i think that if you can handle forgiving them and without getting sucked back into the emotions of that person, that it shouldn't be a problem....but if you still feel caught up, and are wishfully thinking that eventually the two of you will hook up again...I think that is dangerous territory.

What do you guys think?

Number23 said:

i don't get it.

missfee said:

Would you tie the laces of his shoes?

Number23 said:

Depends on the person but...I think I'd just fall for them all over again...

I think that's what 23 meant...




Early one mornin' the sun was shinin',
I was layin' in bed
Wond'rin' if she'd changed at all
If her hair was still red.
Her folks they said our lives together
Sure was gonna be rough
They never did like Mama's homemade dress
Papa's bankbook wasn't big enough.
And I was standin' on the side of the road
Rain fallin' on my shoes
Heading out for the East Coast
Lord knows I've paid some dues gettin' through,
Tangled up in blue.

She was married when we first met
Soon to be divorced
I helped her out of a jam, I guess,
But I used a little too much force.
We drove that car as far as we could
Abandoned it out West
Split up on a dark sad night
Both agreeing it was best.
She turned around to look at me
As I was walkin' away
I heard her say over my shoulder,
"We'll meet again someday on the avenue,"
Tangled up in blue.

I had a job in the great north woods
Working as a cook for a spell
But I never did like it all that much
And one day the ax just fell.
So I drifted down to New Orleans
Where I happened to be employed
Workin' for a while on a fishin' boat
Right outside of Delacroix.
But all the while I was alone
The past was close behind,
I seen a lot of women
But she never escaped my mind, and I just grew
Tangled up in blue.

She was workin' in a topless place
And I stopped in for a beer,
I just kept lookin' at the side of her face
In the spotlight so clear.
And later on as the crowd thinned out
I's just about to do the same,
She was standing there in back of my chair
Said to me, "Don't I know your name?"
I muttered somethin' underneath my breath,
She studied the lines on my face.
I must admit I felt a little uneasy
When she bent down to tie the laces of my shoe,
Tangled up in blue.

She lit a burner on the stove and offered me a pipe
"I thought you'd never say hello," she said
"You look like the silent type."
Then she opened up a book of poems
And handed it to me
Written by an Italian poet
From the thirteenth century.
And every one of them words rang true
And glowed like burnin' coal
Pourin' off of every page
Like it was written in my soul from me to you,
Tangled up in blue.

I lived with them on Montague Street
In a basement down the stairs,
There was music in the cafes at night
And revolution in the air.
Then he started into dealing with slaves
And something inside of him died.
She had to sell everything she owned
And froze up inside.
And when finally the bottom fell out
I became withdrawn,
The only thing I knew how to do
Was to keep on keepin' on like a bird that flew,
Tangled up in blue.

So now I'm goin' back again,
I got to get to her somehow.
All the people we used to know
They're an illusion to me now.
Some are mathematicians
Some are carpenter's wives.
Don't know how it all got started,
I don't know what they're doin' with their lives.
But me, I'm still on the road
Headin' for another joint
We always did feel the same,
We just saw it from a different point of view,
Tangled up in blue.

Sweeny79 said:

oh.

I only broke up with my ex because he moved interstate. He asked me to come with him, but I had only known him 6 months. I still wonder what would have become of us if he had stayed

he was so hot

I think theres really no need to go around talking to X's in the first place.

luv4all7 said:

before they become exes do you mean?

ZombieKitten said:

No after

luv4all7 said:

j/k

ZombieKitten said:

Ohhhhh, I thought I screwed up the question somehow.

luv4all7 said:

I think at first that's good advice. For me, anyway. I need time and distance to pull myself out of it.
But once that's over, I guess it really depends on a lot of things. I certainly don't think there's anything inherently wrong with it. I rather like that I've stayed friends with one of my exes. I will always care for him.

I am friend's with pretty much all my ex's...and most of them are in new relationships.

There is zero drama between us, which is so nice.

it's so easy for me to get sucked back into relationships. I'm a little weak when it comes to the menfolk, unless they REALLY piss me off and then I would just cut them off.

JasmineFire said:

GangstaFam said:

that, too.

JasmineFire said:

hardcore!

i've stayed friends with all my ex's but one. but i wasn't hurt by her or anything so there was no forgiveness needed. i think asking forgiveness does take alot of thought and guts. that being said, if someone actually has it in them to apologize or whatever i think they should be forgiven and a fresh slate given.

Daznym17 said:

yeah i agree. see if someone, especially an ex-girlfriend or an ex-boyfriend sincerely apologizes to you about hurting you for whatever reason that caused you two to break up, i feel like there is no longer a reason to hold back on that person anymore, and the only other thing left to do is to forgive them, and leave the past in the past.

generally speaking, you can only be casual friends with your ex. the whole Jerry-n-Elaine thing only works in the movies and sitcoms. ex-lovers are like napkins: when you're done, get them off your lap.

SnakePeel said: