I'm a fully qualified doctor.

I am licensed to kill in 300 countries and 4 continants.

I went on a date with a girl that posed for playboy once.

I'm a ghostwriter. I've also met Eddie Izzard.

im hung like an action figure

I survived a tornado. It punched holes in my apartment complex's roof in all the units except for mine. It literally circled my apartment but did no real damage to it.

Thanks be to God.

When I was 15 I had a sexual relationship with my counselor in a teen summer-job program. The person was 45 years old.

FunkMistress said:

purplerein said:

Everything happens for a reason! I learned a lot about how manipulative people can be. I grew up real fast after realizing that I was being lied to and played with by someone who should have been a protective figure.

FunkMistress said:

that's a positive result, which is usually not the norm. Respect.

my father and i lived in a crack house when i was 8 years old, back when he was still doing bad. not a good time.

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

Glad your dad is doing better.

fathermcmeekle isn't really ordained

FunkMistress said:

yeah--it's amazing that he's still around, given the fact that he was into some pretty bad stuff before i was born and afterwards. he was a gang member (vicelords) when he was younger, but decided to quit all that after i was born; he told me that i was the sole reason that he slowed his role completely as far as the gang-banging went, but still, as i got a bit older and especially after my mom died he went into a downward spiral--hence us living in the crack house. some pretty fucked-up shit happened there on a daily basis, and i still vividly remember the day when the place got raided by the police. there's a lotta other shit that went down i remember too, but not as much as that raid.

I've was:
- a professional DJ (in clubs and on the radio)
- managed a healthfood restaurant
- worked as a male prostitute
- became a certified massage therapist
- became a certified clinical hypnotherapist
- became a state-registered psychotherapist
- owned a healing arts center
- published a monthly magazine devoted to alternative health therapies
- became a 5th grade teacher (5 years of it)

...and just quit to go back to school for culinary arts to hopefully open my own restaurant

purpleunderground said:

wow