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PrintableSweeny79 said: Novabreaker said: FHM: Someone e-mailed the office last week with a movie clip of a woman being "entertained" by a friendly dalmatian. Shall we forward it on?
TRENT REZNOR: No - I think I've seen that one. FHM: How does it rate amongst your filth collection? TRENT REZNOR: Not particularly highly. I found a porn web page - God knows how I stumbled onto it - advertising home videos people had sent in for sale. There was this one called 'Roy's Nut Hang', with the catchline "Extreme Male Genital Torture". So I thought, what the fuck, I'll see what this is. A month later, the tape shows up in the mail with no markings on it whatsoever. I put it in, and it's an hour of Canadian parliament meetings. FHM: Christ! That's filth... TRENT REZNOR: No! You see, all of a sudden it fades out - all that was in case Customs go it. Now, I thought I'd seen some evil shit, but this one is as bad as it gets. Nobody in the studio has made it through the whole tape. For example, I'm looking at something that I realise is some guy's cock and balls - but it has twine wrapped around it so tight it's unrecognisable. Next thing you know, he's sitting with it on the hot plate. His cock is bubbling away - and it's sticking, so he's digging at it with a spatula, flipping it over. And if that wasn't bad enough, next thing - it's time to remove the problem, man! Full penis removal - and I'll tell you the part that really gets you. The final little bit of meat - snap! - coming off. FHM: Dear God... WHAT THE FUCK>???? OMG....no words....   i'm in tears... sad tears  | |
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In honor of my proposal from Fauxie, I am going to crack this puppy open and have a celebratory drink!
I can see it now. We will have the Penguin in the bridal party and the flower girls will throw fish chips instead of flowers.  Wanted: Virtual Sugar Daddy to help me buy stuff on Farmville and move up the ranks. Use of Viagra not authorized. Get your two minutes and go! | |
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...I went to a predeployment country briefing on Iraq....dealing with history, culture, yada yada yada.....very interesting actually....learned quite a bit more going into this trip than the other two combined....
ANYhoo....the lieutenant giving the briefing was discussing the Islamic concept of the levels of heaven and hell when she looks at me and asked me to confirm the number of levels in hell....I just happen to have an arabic last name, but am so far removed from that part of my heritage that even though I still possess some resemblance to Middle East citizens, I would never pass as one should I ever find myself cornered....I responded quite curtly that I was fucking Catholic and had no idea of the Islamic concept of heaven and hell...I know she didn't mean anything by it, but I was kinda pissed because I got PROFILED!!!...in uniform no less... ...oh yeah...did I mention the briefing was in our chapel...??? He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow.
(George Eliot) the video for the above... 
http://www.youtube.com/wa...re=related | |
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You didn't curse did you? Wanted: Virtual Sugar Daddy to help me buy stuff on Farmville and move up the ranks. Use of Viagra not authorized. Get your two minutes and go! | |
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ShySlantedEye1 said: You didn't curse did you?
...yeah....sure did...before I realized it had slipped out.....apparently, according to one person I know, I lack the filter that keeps that kind of stuff from indiscriminately coming out..... 
...besides, as a senior non-commissioned officer in the US ARMY (my official, make an excuse title)...I'm allowed a certain level of intolerance for lieutenants.....  He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow.
(George Eliot) the video for the above...
http://www.youtube.com/wa...re=related | |
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reneGade20 said: ShySlantedEye1 said: You didn't curse did you?
...yeah....sure did...before I realized it had slipped out.....apparently, according to one person I know, I lack the filter that keeps that kind of stuff from indiscriminately coming out.....
...besides, as a senior non-commissioned officer in the US ARMY (my official, make an excuse title)...I'm allowed a certain level of intolerance for lieutenants..... Yep, you are going to the many levels of hell for cursing in church! Shame on you! Wanted: Virtual Sugar Daddy to help me buy stuff on Farmville and move up the ranks. Use of Viagra not authorized. Get your two minutes and go! | |
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ShySlantedEye1 said: reneGade20 said: ...yeah....sure did...before I realized it had slipped out.....apparently, according to one person I know, I lack the filter that keeps that kind of stuff from indiscriminately coming out.....
...besides, as a senior non-commissioned officer in the US ARMY (my official, make an excuse title)...I'm allowed a certain level of intolerance for lieutenants..... Yep, you are going to the many levels of hell for cursing in church! Shame on you! ....uhh, trust me...cursing in church is the LEAST of my worries!!!!  He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow.
(George Eliot) the video for the above...
http://www.youtube.com/wa...re=related | |
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Novabreaker said: FHM: Someone e-mailed the office last week with a movie clip of a woman being "entertained" by a friendly dalmatian. Shall we forward it on?
TRENT REZNOR: No - I think I've seen that one. FHM: How does it rate amongst your filth collection? TRENT REZNOR: Not particularly highly. I found a porn web page - God knows how I stumbled onto it - advertising home videos people had sent in for sale. There was this one called 'Roy's Nut Hang', with the catchline "Extreme Male Genital Torture". So I thought, what the fuck, I'll see what this is. A month later, the tape shows up in the mail with no markings on it whatsoever. I put it in, and it's an hour of Canadian parliament meetings. FHM: Christ! That's filth... TRENT REZNOR: No! You see, all of a sudden it fades out - all that was in case Customs go it. Now, I thought I'd seen some evil shit, but this one is as bad as it gets. Nobody in the studio has made it through the whole tape. For example, I'm looking at something that I realise is some guy's cock and balls - but it has twine wrapped around it so tight it's unrecognisable. Next thing you know, he's sitting with it on the hot plate. His cock is bubbling away - and it's sticking, so he's digging at it with a spatula, flipping it over. And if that wasn't bad enough, next thing - it's time to remove the problem, man! Full penis removal - and I'll tell you the part that really gets you. The final little bit of meat - snap! - coming off. FHM: Dear God...  YEAH![Edited 7/7/06 1:02am] | |
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