Don't fret sweetie. It has nothing to do with you. Guys feel they must get a certain amount of money or have reached a plateau in their lives before they get married. They fail to realized we love them for their heart not their wealth. Most of us anyway. Don't worry. We love you!

and it was beautiful. Just absolutely beautiful. A friend of mine that i graduated from college with got married...her and her fiance has been together since high school.

she and her now husband, looked so happy and sure of themselves at the alter. He looked into her eyes like he knew that she was his best friend, his better half, the one he can relate most to and you can tell that he is madly in love with her. He WANTED to be with her. and when she looked into his eyes she showed how much she loved him, how much she could relate to him, and she understands him. all of this i gathered by just looking at them looking at each other at the alter, and also how they were at the reception.

but something bothered me. i couldn't help wondering when that special guywold come into my life that would look at me with such emotion like this guy did with my friend. then i just felt like crying, like i sort of wished why didn't my last beau think that about me, why couldn't i had been special enough for him???? I don't think bad or low of myself or upset at myself, its just why....we were so close, we were like best friends and he threw it all away because i guess he's in that dumb dumb phase guys have when they feel like they either:

1) realize out of the blue that they don't want to commit
2) realize that they can't handle the stress and give and take of a relationship
3) realize that they probably aren't good enough to be with someone special (or whatever, someone told me that this could be a possiblity too)

i was always there for him, i always wanted to be there for him, and just wanted to support him....but somehow its like that still wasn't good enough for him??? If that isn't what is? i'm confused? i guess i'm having a relapse or something??? I just don't get it.

there i have vented for the evening.
[Edited 6/24/06 20:05pm]

missfee said:

Why was it his problem? Why was he dumb? What makes you think he didn't feel good enough. Trust me. if a guy says that he's lying. Maybe he just wasn't ready to spend the rest of his life with one person. it's not a crime. And we'll see if that new husband still feels the same way in a few years. No such thing has a dream marriage.

Spats said:

can't you manage to say one nice thing to anyone?? or better yet... just disappear.

fantasyislander said:

I have said nice things to people here before.

He didn't love you.
At least, he didn't love you the way you love him.
And that's harsh and yucky and difficult to deal with, but better you know it now than waste more time with someone who isn't what you want them to be or isn't honest with you about their feelings. You deserve someone who's head over heels in love with you, who'll look in your eyes the way you saw happen today, and so on. He wasn't it.

Spats said:

i mean besides complimenting hot blondes and big boobs.

CarrieMpls said:

Exactly. It was not his fault. Just wasn't meant to be. But don't hold your breath for "Head over heals in love" or "Looking into your eyes with undying love". That is romance novel BS. That shit does not last.

fantasyislander said:

I have complimented a few women here who are not blonde.

ShySlantedEye1 said:

What crap that it is. If you want a good looking woman you have to have money or will have money in the future.

Spats said:

I've seen some hot women married to car mechanics, beer delivery guys, etc, as opposed to oil tycoons.

Spats said:

I've seen some hot women married to car mechanics, beer delivery guys, etc, as opposed to oil tycoons.

ufoclub said:

i wouldn't care if my love was a streetsweeper... doesn't matter what he does. i don't love him for his money.

Spats said:

every once in a while you say something that truly entertains me...




ok... BEYOND physical appearance. have you complimented anyone beyond what they look like?

fantasyislander said:

You say that now. But you didn't go out looking for a streetsweeper. What does your loverboy look like?

Spats said:

absolutely gorgeous... blonde hair, blue eyes... and when he looks at me with love in his eyes i just melt.

when i first got to know him i didn't even know what he did, had no idea how much money he made. actually, i don't even know now how much he makes.



and before you ask... no i won't post pictures. some parts of my life i like to keep private.

fantasyislander said:

Well there ya go. He's great looking. Women love that to. A great looking streetsweeper would be easier to take than a fat and bald one.

fantasyislander said:

Well there ya go. He's great looking. Women love that to. A great looking streetsweeper would be easier to take than a fat and bald one.

fantasyislander said:

Don't fret sweetie. It has nothing to do with you. Guys feel they must get a certain amount of money or have reached a plateau in their lives before they get married. They fail to realized we love them for their heart not their wealth. Most of us anyway. Don't worry. We love you!

ShySlantedEye1 said:

What crap that it is. If you want a good looking woman you have to have money or will have money in the future.

He didn't love you.
At least, he didn't love you the way you love him.
And that's harsh and yucky and difficult to deal with, but better you know it now than waste more time with someone who isn't what you want them to be or isn't honest with you about their feelings. You deserve someone who's head over heels in love with you, who'll look in your eyes the way you saw happen today, and so on. He wasn't it.

Missfee - the guy might just be too young and immature. That's what it sounds like to me. It's actually sort of a mark of maturity on his part to recognize this in himself... and it does you a favor in the end.

It's not you, it's him. New doors will open for you, never fear...