1. Why is it that when you're right no one remembers, but when you're wrong no one forgets?

2. A real person has two reasons for doing anything... a good reason and the real reason

3. Originality is the art of concealing your sources

4. When two people meet to decide how to spend a third person's money, fraud will result

5. Am I ignorant or apathetic? I don't know and I don't care

6. Adult: Someone who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle

7. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them

8. A platonic relationship is an oxymoron