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Office Birthdays... For the 100th time in my life, I have a birthday card sitting in front of me in a manila folder that I'm supposed to sign. I barely know the person, and it's rude not to sign.
Does anyone have any good ideas of what to write? I hate to just write the standard "Have a great birthday" - this stuff is so cheesy, it's insincere, I'm reading what other people wrote, and it's all so fake - someone wrote, "you rock" - how stupid... Who started this crap? Can't we just have cake and call it a day? Maybe I should write, happy birthday, whoever you are. . | |
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We don't do this at our office because we're not fake like that. But if you know it's the person's birthday, why not wish 'em a good one? | |
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go joan rivers style and write
"i don't know who you are and i don't know why the fuck i'm signing this but i wish you a happy birthday none the less, i guess" and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
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IstenSzek said: go joan rivers style and write
"i don't know who you are and i don't know why the fuck i'm signing this but i wish you a happy birthday none the less, i guess" | |
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P.S.: unless you are a child molestor, or a total bitch, in which case i wish you a terrible day and a worse life kind regards moi and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
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*#*(!@$!
It's a GAS GAS GAS being in charge of this. You're in charge of 25 middle-aged male toddlers, all whining at how *this* frosting is too rich and 'just because he likes carrot cake doesn't mean the rest of us do'! I can only laugh. As if it boosts employee morale when I'm out for 40 minutes hustling in traffic for a Superman cake for 58-year-old Dennis, balancing it and a gallon of ice cream on my passenger seat with my right hand when I hit the brakes or turn- meanwhile the office is a nightmare on wheels without someone to answer the phones, handle customer complaints, process account payments and gently wipe their collective butthole. You want a Bob The Builder cake with raspberry custard filling, light on the special whipped cream frosting? And Neopolitan? Oh, wait, mint chip instead? Of course I have time! Oh shit, my hat done fell off | |
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i just write my first name with a smiley face beside it. i totally know whatcha mean, i feel awkward signing office birthday/get-well/death-in-the-family cards because i barely know anybody in the office well enough to actually say something of worth.
sign my edit [Edited 5/30/06 13:15pm] | |
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INSATIABLE said: [rant was here]
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INSATIABLE said: *#*(!@$!
It's a GAS GAS GAS being in charge of this. You're in charge of 25 middle-aged male toddlers, all whining at how *this* frosting is too rich and 'just because he likes carrot cake doesn't mean the rest of us do'! I can only laugh. As if it boosts employee morale when I'm out for 40 minutes hustling in traffic for a Superman cake for 58-year-old Dennis, balancing it and a gallon of ice cream on my passenger seat with my right hand when I hit the brakes or turn- meanwhile the office is a nightmare on wheels without someone to answer the phones, handle customer complaints, process account payments and gently wipe their collective butthole. You want a Bob The Builder cake with raspberry custard filling, light on the special whipped cream frosting? And Neopolitan? Oh, wait, mint chip instead? Of course I have time! oh God I've never been in charge of it. I could only imagine! | |
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look up a sartre or camus quote on google and write it in the card. they'll either think you're cool or pretentious or disgruntled, any of which can work toward your favor sooner or later. | |
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