Go through the alphabet and relate each letter to a part of your life.

Here's mine...

A is for Andy.

One of my best friends. An oasis of sanity amongst my friends. He always says and does the right thing. He and his partner Kay split up last year but I think they're getting back together. She had breast cancer and started an affair in a sort "life is too short" epiphany. I love him - not like that though.

B is for Barry the Bisexual Ex-Burglar.

One of my crazy neighbours in my block of flats. My most Barry-esque moment was him saying "I'm not gay and I'll prove it". With that, he grabbed my hand and shoved it down the front of his track-pants. I pulled my hand back out just as he said, "See? I'm not hard". He had a semi.

C is for Crack-Whore-Bitch.

Another of my crazy neighbours whom lives in the flat directly above me. Her mangy dog woke me up at 05.00 a.m. on Thursday morning; yapping in the lobby. I ran into the lobby, half-naked and poured a jug of water over it's head.

D is for Darren.

The name of my older brother whom I've only really seen three times in the last two years. It's also the name of a friend I used to rent a house with. Darren (the friend) is getting married in August. He's had "his moments" too... He was once dancing around his living room to Bob Marley songs whilst drunk. I was sort of sat on the couch, taking it all in. He fell over and sort of landed on me, saying "I think me and you are going to end up in bed tonight". He's got a lot of issues. I only lived with him for six months. It was me, him and my cousin. We were going to write music together. The dining room was basically a recording studio, covered with wires and amps and stuff. I imagined the house-sharing experience to be like The Partridge Family but it turned into The Manson Family.

E is for Electronics.

I like gadgets - especially retro gadgets. I have a few antique cameras around my flat as ornaments. Maybe they're tacky - but I don't care. I actually have more cameras on display than photographs. I don't know what that says about me, but there you go.

F is for Flat.

The flat I've lived in for nearly three years. Never a dull moment. The occupant whom lived here prior to me, actually died by drowning (and I don't even have a bath - just a shower cubicle). Apparently, he was an alcoholic diabetic epileptic. He had a fit in the shower, knocked himself unconcious and landed with his face in the sump and his legs dangling out the cubicle. His bloated face plugged up the plughole and he drowned in about four inches of water. The neighbours didn't realise anything was wrong until they saw the water running out from under my front door and flooding the lobby. The shower cubicle was specially-modified for him with a seated area and hand-rails. Visitors to my flat have suspiciously questioned me if I'm up to something kinky in there, like golden showers or scat.

G is for God.

I don't believe in God. I believe in a collective consciousness but I wouldn't subscribe to any religion.

H is for Holiday.

I haven't taken a week's holiday since 1989. I hate being away from home. If ever I go anywhere, I usually leave on the Friday and arrive back on the Monday.

I is for Ironing.

I hate ironing. I put my clothes away creased and only iron stuff as I need it. I've never burned myself on the iron but every time I pick it up, my stomach churns in fear. I hate using it. Half of me wants to touch it, to see if it really would hurt. Ugh. I don't know. I'm insane. "I" is also for "insane".

J is for Justin!

Yay, for me! I've only ever met two other Justins in my life. I love my name but hate it when newsreaders say "...and some news, just in" because I always look up - every bloody time. At least it's only when the news is on that I think people in my telly are communicating with me. It'd be worrying if this happened during say, The Antiques Roadshow.

K is for Kites.

I like kites. I'm thinking of buying one. I need a hobby and I think a kite would be relaxing - unless it blew away. Oh. Imagine if the string snapped and it blew away? I'd be distraught. Maybe I shouldn't get a kite. I don't know.

L is for Lesbians.

I think my niece is a lesbian. She's only 11 but she's already displaying certain qualities. She looks, acts and dresses like Jodie Foster in 'Freaky Friday'. I told my mother my suspicions the other month but my mother replied, "Oh, Justin. I don't think so. She's just over-eating and put on a bit of weight". I'm unsure how my mother's mind works at times... Does she equate obesity with lesbianism? Maybe it's something to do with "eating"? Who knows?

M is for Mother.

Love my mother but I don't think she's ever said "I love you". She's never hugged me as far as I can remember - at least not since primary school or kindergarten. Probably just as well because I hate being hugged. I like holding hands and stuff, but hate being mauled. I feel anxious.

N is for Neil.

My ex. Never date people at work. I find myself walking around the office, trying to avoid him, just so I can get to the coffee machine. I feel like Pac-Man at times. The day I realised I was dumped, I lay down on the road outside of work, in the path of an approaching bus. I was trying to get his attention. A temp called Barry started working in my office a few months ago and he's a one-night stand from around the year 2000. I keep having to avoid him too. He gave me a fake mobile number after the one-night stand, so I couldn't contact him again. The skinny little shit-head. Well, he's not so skinny now. I didn't recognise him at first. He looks like the Principal from Ferris Bueller's Day Off. I can hear his camp whining all the way across the office.

O is for Oranges.

I hate oranges. I like orange pop but I hate oranges and orange juice. And marmalade. I hate peeling oranges. It's messy and hurts like hell if you have cuts on your fingers. I like the colour orange - just not the fruit. I don't really like much fruit. I have a funny tummy and any raw food has a profound laxative effect on me.

P is for Peter.

Another friend. I've talked about him at length recently, so I won't bore you all again with the ins and outs - so to speak.

Q is for Queer-Bashing.

I was queer-bashed when I was 15 years old. I ended up in hospital pissing blood. There were two of them. One of them actually went to prison. Upon his release, he wasn't allowed to come within a certain distance of me for a year or two. I see him around now and again, in bars where I live. I've never spoken with him though. I don't wish him any ill-will. Prison would have been pretty grim I suppose. It's not healthy to harbour grudges. You've just got to pick yourself up and get on with life.

R is for Radio.

I listen to radio more than I watch TV. I love podcasts and listen to them constantly. I'm probably going to go deaf at an early age. I'd love to do a podcast myself. I'm going to sort it out soon.

S is for Simon.

My cousin - but he's more like a brother to me. He's basically a straight version of me. He's a bit crazy and can be quite confrontational at times, but underneath it all, he's my partner in crime.

T is for Tom.

Thomas was my mum and dad's last dog. He was a border collie. When he died, they decided not to get another pet ever. I loved that dog. He never barked for no reason, like other annoying yappy dogs. The only time he ever howled is the night I took an overdose, when I was 24. It's like he knew that something was wrong. He was howling in the backyard. I miss him.

U is for Umbrella.

I only ever buy cheapo umbrellas from the pound stores these days, because I always lose them. Having said that, my friend Peter snapped my last umbrella in half over his knee, the other week. We were walking through town and he snatched my brolly off me, screaming "Give me that thing! It's so gay! We're men. We're supposed to get wet - not carry fucking umbrellas!". Peter is a little deranged at times.

V is for V.

I loved that show. I keep meaning to buy it all on DVD but every payday I forget. Diana was basically Alexis Carrington in a spaceship, swallowing gerbils instead of Dex Dexter.

W is for Walking.

I hate walking. I just don't see how people can actually enjoy walking. You run the risk of standing in dog-shit or getting mowed down by a car. Buses are much safer.

X is for X-Rated.

I don't know what I did for um... "entertainment" prior to the internet. Though I never had qualms about buying porn now and again from shops. There's a porn-store in my hometown called Softy's Hard Stuff. I've bought poppers from there in the past. The kind of porn they mainly sell is that weird Germanic Hairy Hippy 70s porn. It's all a bit seedy-looking - but in a good way. There's a kebab shop next door which is rumoured to be a front for a money laundering racket.

Y is for Yoghurt.

I hate the stuff! I like that thin watery yoghurt mixed with mint that you get in Indian restaraunts but other than that, I can't eat it. It tastes like... Well, it just tastes horrible.

Z is for Zippy.

My favourite show as an infant was Rainbow featuring Zippy. He was a yellow one-armed puppet with a zip for a mouth. He always seemed to be ranting about something or other in a queeny rasp. I hated it when the others used to zip his mouth shut mid-rant. I never understood why Zippy just didn't unzip himself. The man who did the Zippy voice used to do the voice of the Daleks in the 70s.

I enjoyed that! You have interesting tales 2 tell Justin.

skipper said:

You should list your alphabet too!

I take it back...file THIS one under "I'm procrastinating from starting a shitload of work I have to do today"...

A is for Apartment, which it sometimes feels like I never leave...

B is for Byron, which, um, is my first name...

C is for Camera, which I'm never without...

D is for Debbie, my oldest sister who passed away...

E is for Empty, which is what my fridge happens to be at the moment...

F is for Food, which I need to go buy...

G is for Get your ass out and Go buy some damn food...

H is for Happy, which in a weird way I am feeling right now...

I is for Istanbul, which is where I'll be in three weeks...

J is for Jay, my brother...*smile*

K is for Kitchen, which I need to clean...

L is for Lisa, my sister who's visiting this week...

M is for Mom, who I'll be calling tomorrow...

N is for Nothing, both literally and figuratively...

O is for Operation, and praying one is not necessary for someone close to me...

P is for Parents, and having to make sure they're well taken care of...

Q is for Questions, which I have a lot of in my life lately...

R is for Rest, which I do not have a lot of in my life lately...

S is for Shoes, which I need to put on so I can Get up and Go buy some damn Food...

T is for Tanys, my beautiful daughter...

U is for Understand, which I'm trying to do...

V is for Voice, which I've been told I have a nice one...lol

W is for Water, which I've been drinking a lot more of lately...

X is for Xray, and the prayers that go along with it...

Y is for Yawn, which I constantly am doing due to the lack of Rest...

Z is for piZZa, which I'm kinda in the mood for right now...

Byron said:

Did you ever buy your dad a mobile phone, so he was easier to track down? Didn't he go through a period of wandering off and getting lost?

Justin1972UK said:

He's been in a hospital for the last 9 months... We're moving him to assisted living hopefully by the end of June.

A is for Apparently creative. I don't think im creative but many say that i am.

A is also for acceptance. We have to learn to accept other people for who they are and love them for that.

B is for Bitches: peeps who do me wrong

C is for Croissant,love em

D is for dark nights, love dark nights/days and director: one day

E is for having to be excellent at all that I do because of the pressure from others. yuck: need to understand A for acceptance

F is for fuck them all: those who don't believe I can be a writer/director/actor etc

G is for good writerr, many say that i am a good writer, they say i write well, i disagree.

H is for humanity. helping other people, fun!

I is for like Andy said ironing. I was thinking about that this mornin. I put on a shirt that wasn't ironed and I was afraid that I will be yelled at cause it wasn't ironed. and i started thinking that i wanna buy all wrinkle free shirts/tops cause I hate ironing.

Jazz love jazz.

Karma. whatever you put out will come back ( as im writing this may father comes up and gives me a kiss on da cheek so..... K is for Kisses: kisses not because of caring or loving but kisses just as an indirect way of telling me to follow that he says.

L is for love. i love that word in general. the world needs more of it.

M is for moving out. I can't wait to leave. its also for money cause i need it. and mother, i love her. happy mothers day ma!

N is for negativity: yuck!tooo much man!

Oreo, love oreo cookies.

Producer, love to be one. Poetry is what I have written so far

Questions. the title of my first poetry book and I love asking.

Records: love big ol records.

Sting: wow looooove him.

Talent: many say that i have it, again i disagreee

United states. wanna come back home soon. miss it sooooo much

Vultures. HAve had many in my life and still do.

Writer, am working on it

X is for Xray, soo many xrays have been done on me, in and out of hospital or doc's office . eeew.

Yellow, dislike the color. too happy.

Zodiac: love astrology, numerology, etc.

Justin1972UK said:[quote]Go through the alphabet and relate each letter to a part of your life.
thanks Justin!

missmad said:

I hope it's nothing serious.

A is for Another list of personal information, for which I'm about to fill out

B is for Battlefront I and II, my favorite computer games at the moment

C is for Computer, for which I go through withdrawl symptoms without

D is for Dad, who I miss a lot.

E is for Ebay, a good source for used computer parts

F is for Food, which I ate too much of for lunch today

G is for God, whom I owe a lot

H is for Home, where I'd rather be right now instead of work

I is for Istanbul, not Constantinople

J is for Jen, a bad memory

K is for Kevin Smith, whose movies I love

L is for "Luke & Leia", my next film

M is for Mom, who I'm calling tomorrow on her special day

N is for Number One, who I'm known as by my Imzadi

O is for ,

P is for Pletz, my last name

Q is for Q, ST:TNG bad-ass

R is for Rachel, love of my life

S is for Shawn, Shelby and Savannah, my kids

T is for Todd, that's me!

U is for Underwear, which I wasn't wearing to bed last night

V is for Vader, SW bad-ass

W is for Who, as in Doctor Who

X is for X-Rated, which I hope my night will be after I get home.

Y is for Yoda's Treasure, my contribution to Star Wars fan films

Z is for Zelda, as in Legend of Zelda for the NES. Kick ass game!

TMPletz said:

There was some really bad acting in tonight's episode. The Cybermen were cool though. They crashed through the windows of a house, in the middle of a party, shouting things like "You will be upgraded or you will be deleted".

A is for Androgyn. One of the things I like about Prince, that he hasn't got a clear-cut sexuality, but an identity that oversteps boundaries between 'male' and 'female', or 'hetero' or 'homo' I look like a girl and I probably act like one, but I feel comfortable in feeling very 'boyish' from time to time. Sometimes I hate this world is divided into male and female.

Oh, and A is for Alphabet, and Apples.

B is for Bert. I've been in love three times. This one has stayed in my heart for a long time. I kept crying over him for four years, although we were only together for nine months.

C is for Citro(e)n/lemon. I love eating lemon after I've finished my Ice-tea, without pulling a face.

D is for Devil. I don't believe he exists but I hate the fact people often think he does. It's easier to blame 'the devil in you' than yourself.

E is for Engelbert Van Arenbergstraat. That's where my apartment is, where I've lived for the last two years with my boyfriend and cat. I miss it very much.

and Elegance, please

F is for Francisco. No more explanation please.

G is for Gazelle. That's the totem I got in scouting...

H is for Hunger. I'm always hungry. Not for food, but for love, silence, chaos, friendship, understanding.

I is for 'I'

Justin1972UK said:

Just when things were going on the right track.

I'll probably still like the episode anyway, but I'll have to wait until tomorrow to see it.

J is for 'jij' ('you' in Dutch)

K is for Knowledge. Although I'm not so sure what that is.

L is for Love, Loneliness and Literature.

M is for Marie and Music. And Mortsel, where I grow up.

N is for No. Very hard to say sometimes.

O is for Opium. The doctor gave some opium-pills once, to stop my coughing, and they gave me beautiful dreams.

P is for Prince

Q is for 'Q' in Scrabble. I hate this letter, but it looks very eleqant.

R is for Room. A very important thing to have.

S is for Sex.

T is for Tea.

U is for Urine. Just kidding, it's for Understanding, like Byron said.

V is for 'Vogel', or bird

W is for Wim, my father's name.

X is for my exes, the ones I loved.

Y is for 'why?'

Z is for Zebra. I like stripes, but I've got to admit I prefer the horizontal ones. Is there an animal with horizontal stripes.

Language, maybe.

A is for Art and Artists – I am an artists and I have a degree in Art

B is for Bitch – This is my biggest fault as a person and I admit to it.

C is for California – My favorite state to visit

D is for Dumb – Put this infront of bitch and you got me...

E is for elephant – I have seen pink ones before

F is for Food – I am hungry

G is for God – Whom does not exist

H is for Home – I still wonder if I am in the right one

I is for Imagination – I always like to let mine run wild

J is for Jessika – Yup that is me

K is for Kitty – I miss my kitty

L is for Love – Scared of it don’t know how to deal with it been hurt from it to many times and I like to run away from it.

M is for Missy – My little Sissy.

N is for No – Rejection is a bitch

O is for Operator – I love it when I call some place and get a live person and not an automated service telling you to press such and such number for a such and such department

P is for Pretty – Yet I feel Unpretty to

Q is for Quick – DJ Quick to be precise

R is for Runaway - I feel like it sometimes

S is for Short – I’ma Shorty

T is for Tough – I am a tough girl yet weak as hell at the same time.

U is for Unhappy – I tend to make people feel this way and I don't even realize I am doing it.

V is for violet - One of my favorite colors

W is for women - Strong and powerful

X is for X – It’s a lovely long lasting feeling

Y is for You - You Rock

Z is for Zebra - They have stripes

A is for uhmnn....A. The first letter of A.D.D.. Of which I suffe....hey! Look.
Some-one left a half-eaten cabbage. I bet it's still good if you peel off the outer layers.....

.
[Edited 5/14/06 8:38am]

Argh I had the whole alphabet typed out and when I tried to post it, it made me log in again. Now it's all gone! I type too slow!

hIsMiRRoR said:

When you're done with typing you should click on "copy" before you post it!


stupid spelling edit
[Edited 5/14/06 0:14am]

Justin1972UK said:

no hun, its not. thanks love M

notoriousj said:

You Muppet! You replied to my rubbish thread and that makes me happy!

Justin1972UK said:

Cheek said:

You're so right. I don't know why I didn't. Well maybe I'll make a new alphabet tonight and this time I'll copy it first!