Graycap23 said:

You so rock!

Spats said:

the having sex part no, pressuring to have a baby yes.

JustErin said:

That's where it gets complicated for me. If either wants to walk away, they should NOT have the kid in the first place.

JustErin said:

when my parents divorced me and my sister stayed with my mother while my dad (who lived a few blocks down) kept my younger brother and sister, my mother had to pay child support i know alot of women who children by men who have simply walked away. and its very hard to acquire child support from someone who is unemployed. as for paying for a child that he did not wish to have it goes back to what was said before-use protection or don't do it. its not complicated t all i dont' think.

Spats said:

How about... any man who doesn't want kids should do everything in his power not to get a woman pregnant.

Do you ever put ANY responsibility on the man?

But that's just in general... In the case of people who are married but want different things it's really a gamble - they're BOTH idiots for marrying b/c the shit will come up & be a major issue...




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[Edited 5/12/06 9:28am]

Romera said:

yup, that is precisely who i was referring to.
and let's not forget Tupac's father. These are the same bums that wanna show up on Graduation Day and at weddings and awards ceremonies looking for a congratulatory pat on the back from the child they refused to raise.
The same bitch-ass men who wanna sell lies to tabloids and shit when the kid grows up and gets rich and famous talking 'bout "well i tried to be around for them but their mother did this and their mother did that and she wouldn't let me in the kid's life and boohoohoo..."

yeah i think just like people are always claiming abortion as a way out of parenthood for women, give men a way out, too. Just make it so that it is documented that they made the choice and that they STAY out forever; regrets or not.

and they can't blame MOM for them never being around for the child.

alwayslate said:

CalhounSq said:

Spats said:

Do you ever answer the question at hand or do you just go off on your own bullshit?

How is it "dumber" for the woman if the woman is the one who wants the child? She's getting what she wants so how is she dumber in that instance? Simply b/c in your world the woman is always the dumb one?

CalhounSq said:

She is the dumber one because if she has sex with a man that does not want kids then she can very easily wind up a single parent or glued to a man who will resent her and the kid forever. Either way she is making her life difficult. Why put yourself in that position? It's stupid.

Spats said:

That must be a risk she's willing to take going in. So if she has the kid she wants (even while putting her marriage in danger, which they were both willing to do by not seeing eye to eye on kids in the first place) I don't see how SHE'S the dumber one. He'll be the one coming out of pocket w/ child support should they divorce.

brownsugar said:

Telling humans not to have sex is UN-realistic.

Graycap23 said:

thats not what i said. i said use protection.

CalhounSq said:

Then it makes her dumb and a bitch for knowingly having sex with a man who does not want to have kids. She is about as selfish as it gets.

brownsugar said:

protection is NOT 100%

Spats said:

damn why she gotta be a bitch it takes two ya know?

brownsugar said:

That's not what I am talking about. What I am saying is, a woman can decide to give up her child as soon as it's born. If she chooses not to raise it, she can basically abandon it, no questions asked. A man does not have this choice. The woman gets to decide for him whether he will be responsible for the care of that child or not. He has NO say what-so-ever.

The argument that if you don't want kids, you should have used protection is a valid one. However, it should also apply to the woman. If she didn't want to have children she should have used protection. If she didn't, and she has a child, she should held responsible for that child just as much as a man is, even if she decides she doesn't want to raise it.

It is all very complicated. It's all about the rights of each individual, including the rights of the child.

Graycap23 said:

okay well then dont do it

Spats said:

Why do you keep ignoring the man's responsibility in this???

HE would be DUMB for getting her pregnant in the first place!!!

JustErin said:

well i agree that it should also apply to women. my statement was just dont have a baby. period. and that will satisfy both parties. and it just so happens that throughout history the woman is often left with the most responsibility in raising a child so unfortunately the man sometimes gets the short end of the stick when it comes to the welfare of the child.

brownsugar said:

Because she does not care that the guy does not want to have kids and will still have sex with him knowing she can easily get pregnant.

Spats said:

and thats why whomever really doesnt want to have a child should use protection if they deal with some one like that....damn i feel like i'm talkin in circles

CalhounSq said:

Yes he would be dumb for having sex with a woman who wants kids. That's why i am advising guys who don't want kids to stay away from women who do. That's what i do.

brownsugar said:

Well, you certainly don't have to explain that to me. I am a single mom.

I'm just very annoyed by people who do not take responsibility for their own actions.

But I suppose "taking responisbility" can be pretty subjective. This is why I find the whole issue to be very complicated.

i really, really wish that a required class in high school for ALL teens should be 1) the human body - procreation 101 - kids should know exactly what their bodies do and how; and 2) civic law - paternity suits 101.

guys would probably be too scared to ever have sex if they were to understand that, once the sperm leaves their body, they have NO rights when it comes to deciding what happens next.

the law is certainly skewed in favor of the woman in these matters (for the good of the resulting child); the guy cannot force a woman he's impregnated to have an abortion, but he can be forced to udnergo DNA testing to prove paternity, and he can be forced to pay child support.

Graycap23 said:

I agree, she carries it for about 9 months and squeezes it out, and has so much pain.

JustErin said:

I have a son and a daughter.....I almost have to TEACH them 2 entirely different things when it comes to this subject.

Women who play games, manipulate and lie to get pregnant should be flogged in the streets.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

No doubt. There are SEVERAL of them running around.
Especially if they "think" you have some money.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

I agree! They should just do what those gals in the lesbian bar were talking about!