New topic
Printable| Author | Message |
what would you do? i'm in a somewhat sticky situation right now - i'm curious what you guys would do if you were in my shoes...
about this time last year, i approached my boss about splitting my position with the community center. i was the Director of Development, in charge of events, the community campaign, the annual report and grantwriting. i was burned out on events and, to some degree, on some of the overbearing committee members. so i prepared a cost analysis of hiring a p/t events coordinator and letting me be a contract grant writer, which showed how we could do this without increasing costs. my boss accepted it and we proceeded to find an events person as of july 1. my proposed contract called for $2,000 per month in contract fees to me, and the contract was written for a 2-year term, with a grant writing goal of $81,500 for the first year. about two weeks before the signing of the contract, my boss added a stipulation that cut the term basically to a 9-month payment schedule, with the last 3 months of the term (i.e. $6,000) only payable if the $81,500 goal had been met. the contract is silent on any grants committed for subsequent fiscal years. he brought this up at a time when i was well into starting my business, and he pretty much had me over a barrel. now we are a month and a half before the end of the fiscal year, and i am $2,000 short of my goal. i have, however, raised an additional $77,500 for the next two fiscal years already, and there are two pending grants that may or may not be awarded this fiscal year. what it boils down to, under the letter of the contract, i'm out $6,000 for being short $2,000. the contract also does not consider the fact that i've run the most successful community campaign ever, raising $9,000 over goal. but in the contract, i get no credit for that work. so my boss and i met yesterday. i approached the situation by saying that neither one of us anticipated this situation. he actually admitted to me that he did indeed anticipate this - it's his ideal outcome, since he's netting $4,000 (my opinion, not his words). he said he would bring it to the administrative committee. having been in many of those meetings, i know that the committee will do exactly what he proposes, so this is pretty much moot. he asked me to write up new wording for this issue for next fiscal year. i'm tempted to suggest taking it out all together - but i doubt he'll go for it. basically, i feel i got dicked in this whole deal (and not in a good way  ). i can't afford going without pay for three months, and i'm looking into either temping or finding a new job altogether and giving up my business.
my question now is - should i do the Buddhist thing and release him in love as Mach would say, or go and talk to a lawyer and risk alienating an employer of 7+ years on whom i might rely for a reference down the road? i would expect this kind of thing in the corporate world, but i'm hanging on to the notion that the nonprofit world should be different. time to let go of that attachment, huh?
so, what would you do?  | |
- E-mail - orgNote -  Report post to moderator |
 time to release that attachment ... with love
I honestly do not know what i would do in your shoes hun  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Mach said: time to release that attachment ... with love
I honestly do not know what i would do in your shoes hun i thought you might say that!
actually, i'm leaning that way.  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
weird. i'm pondering similar issues at work: i have a near perfect attendance record (one sick day in two years) and my reward for this is to have to do the work of two people when someone else calls in sick (we're talking chronic absenteeism on her part....20 days of sick time in an 8 month period)
your situation sounds pretty much worse, sorry to say, but in general my conclusion is that it's better to be employed than not. perhaps that's cowardly and oversimplified but... even though i know i'm morally right, if i criticize the way my boss does her job (i.e. punishing those of us who show up for work by forcing us to cover for those who don't) i know my reputation for being a 'team player' here will suffer. so.... cowardly though it may seem my advice is tough it out*. talk to your boss, protect yourself in the future against this kind of exploitation, but keep your job until you have something else lined up. not the best or most courageous advice but there it is... 
*until you win the lottery or inherit a large sum of money, enabling you to flip your boss the bird and walk away laughing | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
i read this post a couple times .... to try to understand your delemna  ... (i do not work in "grants" etc - so it is me ...and not your style of writing)
key point : i've run the most successful community campaign ever
question : do you feel you are worth it ? would your boss feel you are worth it ? You say that he will take it up with the administrative committee (which will do exactly what he proposes) so i am guessing you can at least wait to hear what his "outcome " of that is - and then you at least know where the path is proceeding (or you have to make a choice which path u want to proceed on )... my gut - with regards to an atty - is that it doesnt sound that you have much to go on .... or anything was done "illegal" ... sounds like u signed a contract ... it didnt work out the way you really wanted it to .. and now you want the contract changed ... unless i am missing something ... my gut is if your decision is to leave- then do it- and get a good reference (express your dismay-some ... but in a professional manner) . In the non-profit world ... as in all business ... its always better to NOT BURN any bridges ... you never know when this person will come back into your life ... or you will need a reference, etc ... In my 15 yrs in the business climate- i have learned alot. Including in that "learning " was many stupid decisions and many things revolving around negotiating for myself , etc .... when i was in sales we had common "splits" with the boss that was around 50%- 55% .... and i later learned ... as i got more successful ... that alot of seasoned professionals had "sweetheart " deals of 80%-20% ..... recently- a gal who i know was talking about this and i gave her some advice (as another person before told me---) : ---- you gotta fight for yourself (cus management is gonna give an offer that probably is NOT their best offer) ... i went on to tell this girl ... who is relatively new in the business but doin very well --- that i would fight for an 80-20 split (maybe settle for a 70/30 etc) Negotiating such things are one of the suckiest things about being in self employed field ... but very necessary and alot of the times the management people respect you more after you negotiate acceptable terms .... IN short - i would NOT burn any bridges ... and maybe determine whether or not to move on (unless they surprise you with some compromise)... from what i know about ya - you do well on your negotiations/opinions on the p and r forums .... so you should do well with whatever u decide with this ! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
 | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
XxAxX said: weird. i'm pondering similar issues at work: i have a near perfect attendance record (one sick day in two years) and my reward for this is to have to do the work of two people when someone else calls in sick (we're talking chronic absenteeism on her part....20 days of sick time in an 8 month period)
your situation sounds pretty much worse, sorry to say, but in general my conclusion is that it's better to be employed than not. perhaps that's cowardly and oversimplified but... even though i know i'm morally right, if i criticize the way my boss does her job (i.e. punishing those of us who show up for work by forcing us to cover for those who don't) i know my reputation for being a 'team player' here will suffer. so.... cowardly though it may seem my advice is tough it out*. talk to your boss, protect yourself in the future against this kind of exploitation, but keep your job until you have something else lined up. not the best or most courageous advice but there it is...
*until you win the lottery or inherit a large sum of money, enabling you to flip your boss the bird and walk away laughing an inheritance is pretty much out of the question, so the lottery it is! 
i guess both of our situations boil down to the wish to be appreciated. why this is so hard for bosses to understand is beyond me. at the same time, there's something to be said for finding one's own validation without relying on others to do so.  maybe that's the lesson i'm supposed to learn here.
best of luck to you, and i'll consider toughing it out - at least for a little while. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
SnidelyWhiplash said: i read this post a couple times .... to try to understand your delemna
... (i do not work in "grants" etc - so it is me ...and not your style of writing)
key point : i've run the most successful community campaign ever
question : do you feel you are worth it ? would your boss feel you are worth it ? You say that he will take it up with the administrative committee (which will do exactly what he proposes) so i am guessing you can at least wait to hear what his "outcome " of that is - and then you at least know where the path is proceeding (or you have to make a choice which path u want to proceed on )... my gut - with regards to an atty - is that it doesnt sound that you have much to go on .... or anything was done "illegal" ... sounds like u signed a contract ... it didnt work out the way you really wanted it to .. and now you want the contract changed ... unless i am missing something ... my gut is if your decision is to leave- then do it- and get a good reference (express your dismay-some ... but in a professional manner) . In the non-profit world ... as in all business ... its always better to NOT BURN any bridges ... you never know when this person will come back into your life ... or you will need a reference, etc ... In my 15 yrs in the business climate- i have learned alot. Including in that "learning " was many stupid decisions and many things revolving around negotiating for myself , etc .... when i was in sales we had common "splits" with the boss that was around 50%- 55% .... and i later learned ... as i got more successful ... that alot of seasoned professionals had "sweetheart " deals of 80%-20% ..... recently- a gal who i know was talking about this and i gave her some advice (as another person before told me---) : ---- you gotta fight for yourself (cus management is gonna give an offer that probably is NOT their best offer) ... i went on to tell this girl ... who is relatively new in the business but doin very well --- that i would fight for an 80-20 split (maybe settle for a 70/30 etc) Negotiating such things are one of the suckiest things about being in self employed field ... but very necessary and alot of the times the management people respect you more after you negotiate acceptable terms .... IN short - i would NOT burn any bridges ... and maybe determine whether or not to move on (unless they surprise you with some compromise)... from what i know about ya - you do well on your negotiations/opinions on the p and r forums .... so you should do well with whatever u decide with this ! great points, thank you! i agree, burning bridges is not a constructive thing for either side. (pun somewhat intended )
i'm looking into some options right now to be able to leave on good terms. and, as i said in my response to Xx's post, maybe i need to learn to be my own validation. i know what i've accomplished for the organization, and i'm proud of that. whether or not others appreciate it really doesn't change the facts.  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
one of my only thoughts ... (and some times because of ONE BAD EXPERIENCE ... i think all bosses are out to dick ya) .... was --- does this current boss think that you are expendable and --- will he just put into your place "the events person" you hired (and use your "model" for success that you created and had success with ??? )  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
SnidelyWhiplash said: one of my only thoughts ... (and some times because of ONE BAD EXPERIENCE ... i think all bosses are out to dick ya) .... was --- does this current boss think that you are expendable and --- will he just put into your place "the events person" you hired (and use your "model" for success that you created and had success with ??? )
funny you should mention that - he wants me to develop a detailed grant plan for next fiscal year, which would basically mean doing the legwork for somebody to write the grants. he could indeed hire somebody else to do the writing work, possibly for less money than he'd be paying me. or he could even find a college intern to do it for free.
ya think i'm going to develop a grant plan before a new contract is signed?! i might be loopy, but i'm not stupid! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
i dont have any great suggestions...
just wanted to say im sorry you're going through this
OH ! and congrats on the great work you did One of the best days of my life... http://prince.org/msg/100/291111
love is a gift 
an artist with no fans is really just a man with a hobby.... | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
you mention a "new contract being signed" ... and yet-- u do have a 2 yr contract right ??? (that you want amended .... ) SO - from his standpoint - he really is content right now ... until you say "you are looking for another job " or imply something like that ...
one thing that bothers me about business ... and your post (and it is always something i have suffered from to ! ) ... DO NOT be afraid to ask for something ... the worst he/she can say is no ... we all hate the word no ... | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
IrresistibleB1tch said: SnidelyWhiplash said: one of my only thoughts ... (and some times because of ONE BAD EXPERIENCE ... i think all bosses are out to dick ya) .... was --- does this current boss think that you are expendable and --- will he just put into your place "the events person" you hired (and use your "model" for success that you created and had success with ??? )
funny you should mention that - he wants me to develop a detailed grant plan for next fiscal year, which would basically mean doing the legwork for somebody to write the grants. he could indeed hire somebody else to do the writing work, possibly for less money than he'd be paying me. or he could even find a college intern to do it for free.
ya think i'm going to develop a grant plan before a new contract is signed?! i might be loopy, but i'm not stupid! I think you have to go where your heart leads you. I wouldn't work for someone as unethical as this and would probably enjoy dropping him in the shit by leaving with as little notice as possible. But then again, what you're doing is good work, so he's got you over a barrel. I'd listen to Mach I think ... but I'd be seething inside .... I'm no help am I?  ... I can't decide what I'd do if I were in your situation, other than be angry for being manipulated like this. Good luck girl! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
... I suppose funding the extra $2,000 yourself to get the $4,000 is out of the question? | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
nakedpianoplayer said: i dont have any great suggestions...
just wanted to say im sorry you're going through this
OH ! and congrats on the great work you did thank you, NPP | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
SnidelyWhiplash said: you mention a "new contract being signed" ... and yet-- u do have a 2 yr contract right ??? (that you want amended .... ) SO - from his standpoint - he really is content right now ... until you say "you are looking for another job " or imply something like that ...
one thing that bothers me about business ... and your post (and it is always something i have suffered from to ! ) ... DO NOT be afraid to ask for something ... the worst he/she can say is no ... we all hate the word no ... yes, we're looking at an amended contract that would reflect the fundraising goals for the new fiscal year. i'm willing to walk - and i'm looking for another job right now. i'd hate to give up my business, but a girl's got to eat! we'll see what the future brings, i suppose. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Reincarnate said: IrresistibleB1tch said: funny you should mention that - he wants me to develop a detailed grant plan for next fiscal year, which would basically mean doing the legwork for somebody to write the grants. he could indeed hire somebody else to do the writing work, possibly for less money than he'd be paying me. or he could even find a college intern to do it for free.
ya think i'm going to develop a grant plan before a new contract is signed?! i might be loopy, but i'm not stupid! I think you have to go where your heart leads you. I wouldn't work for someone as unethical as this and would probably enjoy dropping him in the shit by leaving with as little notice as possible. But then again, what you're doing is good work, so he's got you over a barrel. I'd listen to Mach I think ... but I'd be seething inside .... I'm no help am I? ... I can't decide what I'd do if I were in your situation, other than be angry for being manipulated like this. Good luck girl!"manipulated" is exactly the word i've been tossing around in my mind... that's the part that bothers me the most.
and yes, i've thought about hitting a friend up for a $2,000 "donation" (read: short term loan) directly to the agency. that would be one way around this. Mach is right, i think - none of this is worth the stress and worry. if we can't negotiate a mutually agreeable outcome, i'll release him in love (and go kick a wall somewhere afterwards! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
IrresistibleB1tch said: XxAxX said: weird. i'm pondering similar issues at work: i have a near perfect attendance record (one sick day in two years) and my reward for this is to have to do the work of two people when someone else calls in sick (we're talking chronic absenteeism on her part....20 days of sick time in an 8 month period)
your situation sounds pretty much worse, sorry to say, but in general my conclusion is that it's better to be employed than not. perhaps that's cowardly and oversimplified but... even though i know i'm morally right, if i criticize the way my boss does her job (i.e. punishing those of us who show up for work by forcing us to cover for those who don't) i know my reputation for being a 'team player' here will suffer. so.... cowardly though it may seem my advice is tough it out*. talk to your boss, protect yourself in the future against this kind of exploitation, but keep your job until you have something else lined up. not the best or most courageous advice but there it is...
*until you win the lottery or inherit a large sum of money, enabling you to flip your boss the bird and walk away laughing an inheritance is pretty much out of the question, so the lottery it is!
i guess both of our situations boil down to the wish to be appreciated. why this is so hard for bosses to understand is beyond me. at the same time, there's something to be said for finding one's own validation without relying on others to do so. maybe that's the lesson i'm supposed to learn here.
best of luck to you, and i'll consider toughing it out - at least for a little while. in life there are times when we just take it in the behind at work. it isn't fair, it isn't right, but i've never, ever found a law firm, office or any job for that matter that wasn't somehow skewed like that. so imo ultimately the decision is how much we want to have a job.... alas. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Try to come to some agreement with him if you can. I took a 10 thousand pay decrease to get peace. My boss was driving me nuts and I just said fuck it I am out. Now that I am gone, he is sending messages through my friends to get me to call him.  He is hurting in my old department and the staff miss me. Peace of mind agrees with me and less medical bills. Think about it, pray and you will know what you have to do.Wanted: Virtual Sugar Daddy to help me buy stuff on Farmville and move up the ranks. Use of Viagra not authorized. Get your two minutes and go! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Mach said: time to release that attachment ... with loveListen to the modern day sage. News: Prince pulls his head out his ass in the last moment.
Bad News: Prince wasted too much quality time doing so. You have those internalized issues because you want to, you like to, stop. | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
XxAxX said: IrresistibleB1tch said: an inheritance is pretty much out of the question, so the lottery it is!
i guess both of our situations boil down to the wish to be appreciated. why this is so hard for bosses to understand is beyond me. at the same time, there's something to be said for finding one's own validation without relying on others to do so. maybe that's the lesson i'm supposed to learn here.
best of luck to you, and i'll consider toughing it out - at least for a little while. in life there are times when we just take it in the behind at work. it isn't fair, it isn't right, but i've never, ever found a law firm, office or any job for that matter that wasn't somehow skewed like that. so imo ultimately the decision is how much we want to have a job.... alas. i'm actually applying for a job with a group working for social justice... the old "close a door, open a window" scenario (i hope!!) | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
ShySlantedEye1 said: Try to come to some agreement with him if you can. I took a 10 thousand pay decrease to get peace. My boss was driving me nuts and I just said fuck it I am out. Now that I am gone, he is sending messages through my friends to get me to call him.
He is hurting in my old department and the staff miss me. Peace of mind agrees with me and less medical bills. Think about it, pray and you will know what you have to do.that's got to feel sooooo good!!  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
MickG said: Mach said: time to release that attachment ... with loveListen to the modern day sage. Mach rocks! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
just a quick update - it took two lengthy meetings, but i negotiated that this punishment clause would be amended in the new contract, and that i would be paid the difference, were it to come to a similar situation next year.
i've also dug up a quick turn-around grant that might very well put me over the top this year, so things are looking pretty good. thank you all for your input, i'm relieved that this is finally over! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
IrresistibleB1tch said: just a quick update - it took two lengthy meetings, but i negotiated that this punishment clause would be amended in the new contract, and that i would be paid the difference, were it to come to a similar situation next year.
i've also dug up a quick turn-around grant that might very well put me over the top this year, so things are looking pretty good. thank you all for your input, i'm relieved that this is finally over! No you rock! I love your outlook, and your outcome. And the Buddhist thing was right there waiting for you. ^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect, it means you've decided to look beyond the imperfections... unknown | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
As you know IB, I rarely read past the 5th line, and your post is no exception. But, can I ask you something? Are you part of a "crew"? This sounds mighty mafiosa money laundering operation to me. Wer ist dort? Unterbrechende Kuh. Unterbrech... Muh!!! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
sag10 said: IrresistibleB1tch said: just a quick update - it took two lengthy meetings, but i negotiated that this punishment clause would be amended in the new contract, and that i would be paid the difference, were it to come to a similar situation next year.
i've also dug up a quick turn-around grant that might very well put me over the top this year, so things are looking pretty good. thank you all for your input, i'm relieved that this is finally over! No you rock! I love your outlook, and your outcome. And the Buddhist thing was right there waiting for you. indeed it was...  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
GaryTheNoTrashCougar said: As you know IB, I rarely read past the 5th line, and your post is no exception. But, can I ask you something? Are you part of a "crew"? This sounds mighty mafiosa money laundering operation to me.
good point! yes, i'm basically prostituting poor people to make rich people feel good about themselves by giving money. and i'm making a killing in the process, as you can tell! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
IrresistibleB1tch said: GaryTheNoTrashCougar said: As you know IB, I rarely read past the 5th line, and your post is no exception. But, can I ask you something? Are you part of a "crew"? This sounds mighty mafiosa money laundering operation to me.
good point! yes, i'm basically prostituting poor people to make rich people feel good about themselves by giving money. and i'm making a killing in the process, as you can tell! can i kiss the ring! make me capo!Wer ist dort? Unterbrechende Kuh. Unterbrech... Muh!!! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
GaryTheNoTrashCougar said: IrresistibleB1tch said: good point! yes, i'm basically prostituting poor people to make rich people feel good about themselves by giving money. and i'm making a killing in the process, as you can tell! can i kiss the ring! make me capo!in our crew, it'll take something other than kissing the RING to make you capo, my friend! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |