here is a very very rough version of the article. still needs tweaking .

thanks 2 those who answered

I was given the assignment of writing an article about, well, men. Not just any type of men.
Perfect Men.
Men. What do we think of them? Who are they? What is constantly going through their minds? Animals or Amiable? Different kind of species? Like us? Complete opposites?
Before we get into that, I think we have to first define perfection in the general sense and then in it’s more specific meaning
Perfection, what is it? We hear all the time. This and that are perfect. Perfect as in it does what we want it too, achieves what we expect. It opens up the bottle of wine easier, the ice cream looks great in the bowl, thanks to the ice-cream scooper and the Nat King Cole record is heaven, I am always listening to it. We also hear this all the time, at least I do, it has to be perfect, not like this, like this. You have to do it the right way.
Some definitions for the term are “the state of being without a flaw or defect”, “Perfection is a state of flawlessness. Something is called perfect when it has no flaws, or when it comes very close to this ideal.” We all have notions of what ideal means. Do we ever come close?
What is a perfect man? What is a perfect woman? What is a perfect partner? Is their such a thing as perfect. We watch on TV, the idolized idea of perfection everyday. Designer clothing, Brand-name makeup, Brand-name jewelry designers, people to do their nails, hair, get them dressed and the like while sitting back and relaxing in a chair possibly with their names on the back. As the Advertisements for the E Channel show “Style Star” tell us and to an extent, make us believe: the clothes make the star. So what the perfect man is not even a man, sure he is in that area and he has a brain, like all of us do, but never uses it? The perfect women has no brains either, she’s just a walking figure. The perfect person is out there, as long as they dress well thus they are perfect? The perfect man is superficial, dressed in Hugo Boss from head to toe?
Hello
Mr. Flawless!







When looking for a partner what are we expecting?
Sure some of us might want our “boys” to cook, clean, help out with the kids once in a while instead of just taking out the garbage as apparently men are supposed to do. We want them to look sharp and handsome when going out. They have to be sensitive to our needs, have manners, are caring, compassionate, patient, loving, honest, funny or at least with some sense of humor, intelligent, love us etc. Wow, quite a list! I wonder what they look for in us?. Wonder if they have a list.
How many qualities do you think would be on their list?

Are these expectations realistic? Do we have a list tucked away in a “secret” drawer only to open it when we see a man we like, does that drawer get opened when things are not going as planned?
When “hunting” what do we look for? What attracts us and I do not mean the superficial even though we are attracted to the outside, it is not necessarily what grabs our attention first, I mean what makes us interested? Charm, Wit, Sense of Humor?

Do we want them to have a similar mindset to us? Do we want them to have a complete different outlook on things? Do we want them to think exactly like we think? Do we want them to be our best friend? Part friend part foe? A relationship is give and take, 2 people coming to the table as equals, 2 people coming to the table as 2 people, not one person and a half of another. Two people who are secure in themselves to be able to meet and enjoy themselves for who they are.





wanted to find out what other people thought:
I don’t know if this is a serious response, it might be, it might not be. “Lots of money, wine and dine.” one person posted. I guess for some they are many perfect men out there.
“It’s what the man works at to define himself” said Machaela. It’s what the man works at to define himself. Powerful statement. What are we defined by? In answering the perfect man question Jacqueline tells us “it is a combination of inside AND outside” Agreed. Isn’t it the combination of inside and outside that also defines us? What do we define ourselves by, just the portable pats on the back we get from others or the love that we give ourselves and the love that we receive? Do Senor and Senorita Perfecto tell themselves that they are more than they are to make themselves feel better and to attract someone?

People, not just men, do things for themselves first not the other way around. We first have to work out our limitations. The limitations of our personalities, the limitations of the physical and the limitations of our minds. Working out what we can and cannot do has to be a focus for all. What is the point of a relationship, then? Remember give and take?

There was a movie released not too long ago called “The Perfect Man”. I rented it since this article is on that subject. The mother has 2 daughters, she has many relationships but they never work out and in turn she packs up all and lea… well,. she runs away to a new environment every time. Her eldest daughter dislikes seeing her mother so unhappy so she plans to cheer her up by pretending to be her mother’s secret admirer.
The “perfect plan for the perfect man.”

The film tries to answer the question of perfect men by comparing heroes “ to their real-life counter-parts: what makes today’s perfect man perfect? What is it he says or does that makes him a woman’s perfect man?”
“Well that depends everyone’s different” is the answer we get from the silver screen.

In real life and not at the movies is their a timeline for finding the perfect man? 2 weeks? Months? Longer? Then, do we get desperate? Should we get desperate at all? Why do we get desperate in the first place? Insecurity?





Is it insane to think that any human being could find an individual who fits the worldwide description of perfection. I suppose, we are allowed to live in a dream for a while. Since we are, is it lust or love?

There might have been times where you have tried to analyze yourself, your good and bad qualities, the qualities you can improve in oneself, which is everything since we learn and grow constantly. It didn’t work did it? Trying to pick apart your own mind. Why? We always see what others cannot: our flaws. That is in us. What about in other people? We see the only the greatest, we only see what we WANT to see.. We do not see reality, It is not real, it is a made-up fantasy. It is Candy Land.

Sure, there are ideas of perfection: going for a vacation with no phone calls from work, movie-night with no children or thought of no children, wonderful dinner with a man who you thought was terrific after numerous dates only to discover his “new” habit of always leaving you with the bill to pay.

In the general sense of the word, there is no such thing as perfect or perfection. Perfection is what our eyes see. Perfection only exists in our minds. It is and always will be a dream. Think about this for a minute, what if we were perfect? Would we have any problems? If we were perfect we could do anything we wanted. If we had that perfect by someone by our sides, in the general sense, would the game of dating even come into play?

Congrats to you if you have found your Perfect Person. For those of you still waiting and/or looking, the perfection is out there. Love M
[Edited 3/24/06 14:30pm]

thanks for sharing this.

ur welcome. I asked this question for an article and that is a rough version of it.

Lleena said:

I miss LleeLlee.

She'll b back.