ENDING A LONG TERM RELATIONSHIP

i am about to move into a rented flat by myself after my long term relationship has now collapsed for good leaving behind my wee boy and i am scared i am making a huge mistake. i have thought about staying for the sake of my wee boy and just "put-up" with not really being happy with my partner for the next couple of years but i just dont think that is the right thing to do.....i just hope things will be ok, money wise i am a total mess, in fact everything is a total mess but i suppose it can only get better.....anybody else had experience of leaving a long term relationship? how did it go for you?
[Edited 11/3/05 3:47am]
[Edited 11/3/05 13:48pm]
[Edited 11/3/05 14:04pm]


UPDATE: well here i am ,4 months after leaving my relationship and i must admit, i am still in a mess and it is harder than i ever imagined it would be...
i miss my wee boy boy so much although i still see him most days for a wee while and my ex is still hurting badly which isnt nice too see...i sometimes think it would make things easier if me and her had NO contact whatsoever, i try and help her out with certain things but maybe i am making the split up worse.....i dont know, i dont love her anymore but i care enough for her to want to help her but maybe i do need to turn my back on her to allow her to move on with her life.

It's so sad when kids are involved. I can't imagine having to leave my boys, it would be the worst thing in the whole world

It will all work out in it's own way

time heals all wounds, unless you're a shoe...in that case, time wounds all heels.

Seriously, I think you did the right thing in separating. If you two were unhappy, I don't believe in staying together for the children. You do that and you become resentful of each other, and the child grows up seeing your relationship and that's what he or she has as a model or a pattern. That's not cool. Better you two be separated and happy and able to care for your child each in your own way. Eventually you and your ex will adapt to the break and be able to raise your child as a "team". It can happen, given time.

You're gonna be okay.

blackbob said:

that is so true about the no contact thing..the less contact you have the less it hurts

i hope things get better for all of you, soon.

Anx said:

I totally agree with Anx-- one of my longtime friends had a break-up with a child involved, but he made it work out for the best with the mother of his child. A couple of years have passed, and though its not what u envisioned, its better for the kid to see you both happy. My friend even takes day trips and family days with them.

As tumultuous as his relationship was, i know seeing that that anything can happen...just give it time...

Mazerati said:

i agree all there is needed is time.

, .....

thanks everyone...i just have to hope that it will get better.

blackbob said:

It will, but give it more time. It wasn't fair on either of you, or your son, to stay in a relationship where you were so unhappy. You did the right thing but I'm sorry it hurts so much right now.