Ladies, you are exempt from this question because for most of you faking an orgasm is like riding a bike (unless you're with the Captain, that is, and in that case no acting is neccessary). But fellas, you know the deal. Have you ever been with someone and, you know, you are satisfying them like nobody's business. Bam, bam, bam, they are having a great time but you have things on your mind. Maybe your stock is down or maybe you're worried about your sports team and how they will do in a big game. So, after several hours of satisfying your partner in ways they could never dream of being satisfied, you pull a Meg Ryan and fake it. Yes, I realize that guys have a harder time doing this but, with a jimmy hat, it is possible.

Fess up, guys. Ever faked the "big O"?

Only once and I refuse to talk about it.

Yes, I did it once or twice also.

It was a long night. I had the O once or twice already, but I wanted to bring my lover to a place never reached before. However, after bring here to that place I found I was unable to finish my own. So I faked it. Later I learned it was okay to stop.

whenever i have to do this, i usually start hitting it doggystyle, then start breathing heavier and gyrating faster then pull out and spit on their butt.




.
[Edited 3/6/06 15:23pm]

sinisterpentatonic said:

sinisterpentatonic said:

i just copied that on to an index card and filed it in my recipe box.

Anx said:

Good luck!

helps if you drink a couple glasses of milk that day.

XxAxX said:

Hi X! i'm still to your house!

sinisterpentatonic said:

i never before thought of a spittoon as a sex toy but now...





[Edited 3/6/06 10:57am]

It's so beautiful when you share with the Captain.

Makes me want to have intercourse with each and every one of you.

this thread

sinisterpentatonic said:

That's just wrong!

You've got a whole system figured out and shit.

i know i've pulled a fakerooni at least once. i'd tell the details but i can't remember them. i mean, if it were memorable, i wouldn't have faked an orgasm, now would i?

brownsugar said:

This thread

Can we get an emoticon for faking an orgasm on here?

Anx said:

Yes, but the circumstances to get you to that point are usually so awkward that it's hard to forget. At least for me.

GangstaFam said:

no, not really. at the time, it was just a way to abbreviate some tedious sex.



god, i'm jaded
[Edited 3/6/06 11:02am]

XxAxX said:

hey, i never said i was chewing tobacco when i did this!

Anx said:

Yes. Yes you are.

God, I'm glad this has only ever happened to me once. I'm no good at lying! And neither is the pen0r!

GangstaFam said:

yeah, it gets more and more difficult to get the pen0r to lie. but then again, what's the point?

Anx said:

exactaroni!

Anx said:

There is no point. But I was as Tricky would say, "Young, Dumb and Full of Cum". I had no idea what I was doing.

GangstaFam said:

well when you're in that phase, the hard-ons flow free like the river jordan. it's all one big sausage buffet with a skin flute orchestra on the side playing the theme from shaft while weenage flies all over the place like migrating geese.


or, uh...something.

Anx said:

I can tell you haven't slept.

GangstaFam said:

huh? what?

Anx said:

er... ummm....

Anx said:

Don't you know it's supposed to be better for boys?

Anx said:

i can't recall those days!

sinisterpentatonic said:

that's what scientology will do.

sinisterpentatonic said:

pssst! i think that's an excerpt from that book 'The Bridges of Madison County'

XxAxX said:

FINALLY! someone who gets my references!