What's reasonable? What has worked for you people?

I've had an offer to move in with somebody whom I love dearly, but have only been with for a few months. There are some practical issues, but more than that, it just seems a little nuts.

Is it?

I would say at least 1 year b4 that happens

nah it is entirely dependant on the situation
some people could be married in that length of time
but if it feels a little nuts then i guess you have to question if you are ready

I would say that you are the only person who can answer that.
If you are in love then go with your gut feeling.

muirdo said:

emm said:

How....U....Do.....in....?

luv4u said:

co-sign. It has been my experience that moving in with anyone in a romantic setting before you have the chance to see them in all seasons = heartache. I know that right now moving in together may sound wonderful and it does have its financial benefits, but it may not be worth it in the long run. If this isn't a "have to" situation, then i would recommend against it.

alexnevermind319 said:

See, this seems like quality advice.

emm said:

. . . but it doesn't really FEEL nuts. . . it just seems, intellectually, like a possibly unwise thing. . .


edit
[Edited 2/21/06 0:39am]

muirdo said:

And I am in love, but following my gut feelings has led me into absolute misery in the past, so I hesitate.

I hate that! I want to be able to dive in like I've never been hurt. But I can't.

my boyfriend moved in with me after half a year.

absolutely no regrets.

If you are wanting to move in with someone. Have them move in with you. The place you own. Because if it goes bad then you can kick their ass out and not the other way around. I have had no interest in moving in with anyone. I like my space. I don't need to see them every single day when i wake up and when i go to bed.

Spats said:

Well, in this case, I would prefer to have him move in with me, but he's tied to his job. The commute would be nasty.

I like my space too, but it's exactly the waking up and going to bed that I enjoy sharing.

Depends, depends, depends, depends, depends, depends, depends, depends, depends

It really just depends, a day if it feels right, years if it feels wrong, but then if you have been together years and it still ain't workin' maybe it's time to call it a day.

If you don't have dependants, fuck it! Give it a go what harm can it do. If you do have dependants, give it a bit more thought.

I've never lived with someone. I don't know that I ever will. Unless we could afford a really big place so I had my own room for getting away in. I need my alone time. But I need my cuddle time too. So I suppose it's not all bad.
In any case, do what you think is right. How's that for a generic answer?

I don't think I'll ever move in with someone. I'm too much of a heathen.

SeattleInvasion said:

if you have any doubts don't do it. me personally i like my space if i see a person too much it will drive me crazy. sleepovers are good enough but not too damn much.

I wouldn't move in with someone unless I was married. To me it takes all the romance out of seeing them on a date.

But that's just me. (btw very happily married this past december!)

Good luck!

JDINTERACTIVE said:

isnt it about time you started to think about moving out of your parents house?

bizarre said:

While I'm not planning on getting married (to anyone, ever ), I do know what you mean. We're still in that new, fun, happy, fluttery phase, and I'm aware that that's a transient thing, and I'm not anxious to speed its demise.

the first time i met my boyfriend i went back to his house and eleven months later i'm still there having a great time with him,so far it seems to have worked for me.i say go with your instinct,if it doesn't work out you leave, simple as that.

2 minutes!

SeattleInvasion said:

sounds like way too soon then!
the soonest I've moved in with someone was 2 years. Actually that's if you don't count this one guy I lived with once who I started going out with after having lived together 6 months as housemates, and that was a weird situation! hardly ever left the house!

althom said:

I hope you make that the best 2 minutes your wife has ever had....

Right after the wedding.

I wouldn't ever marry someone without living with them first. But that's just me.

muirdo said:

I did three years ago because I was a heathen.

SeattleInvasion said:

Go with your own feeling, if it feels a bit much, wait. If it feels ok, go for ik. It's a good way to find out if this relationship is as good as you thought it would be.

JDINTERACTIVE said:

If you were in heathen why did you move out?