Reincarnate said:

we don't nag, we just repeat the request until it gets done.
My point in an earlier post, which should probably be update to read in a well-established relationship, not a new one, the guy should just do as he is asked first time she asks, to prevent "nagging".

I CAN'T STAND IT

Even worse than having a clingy girlfriend that nags each time she's in earshot is having a buddy who can't stop nagging. Good grief! Men should teach women how to nag.

I normally don't tolerate nagging... as soon as I hear that whiny, constant, seemingly endless nagging tone from a girlfriend I just switch off immediately. A total shutdown.

nilegettolrahc said:

Reincarnate said:

right!

YEP

That's nagging, kiddo.

nilegettolrahc said:

papaa said:

And there's your problem right there. Your coping method will only exacerbate the problem. You are better off living alone.

papaa said:[quote]I CAN'T STAND IT

Even worse than having a clingy girlfriend that nags each time she's in earshot is having a buddy who can't stop nagging. Good grief! Men should teach women how to nag.

I normally don't tolerate nagging... as soon as I hear that whiny, constant, seemingly endless nagging tone from a girlfriend I just switch off immediately. A total shutdown.



blahblahblahblahblahblahblahblahblah
WILLYOUSHUTTHEFUCKUP!DAMN!
[Edited 1/9/06 16:09pm]

...and there we have it - a fundamental difference between men and women

meltwithu said:[quote]

papaa said:

HOW ELSE IS A MAN TO COPE?

Am I to become a shell of a man and go down on my hands and knees and submit to her nagging ways?

nilegettolrahc said:

Reincarnate said:

not really just the deep chasm between those who want to be in a successful relationship and those who don't.

nilegettolrahc said:[quote]meltwithu said:[quote]

papaa said:

men are from mars, women are from pluto
[Edited 1/9/06 16:18pm]

papaa said:

When you have found the one who you want to live out the rest of your days with, you will learn a new word: "compromise". It takes two, baby
[Edited 1/9/06 16:17pm]

meltwithu said:

papaa said:

why do you have such resistance to making your partner happy? do you see a relationship as two people participating equally in a partnership or do you see a relationship as a way to have a personal slave who only exists to satisfy you and has no needs or wants of his or her own?

TIME OUT!

I think you're right. The lady doesn't want to be in a successful relationship. Hence -- the nagging. I get it now. She's stopping me from finding that special, caring, loving, beautiful, fantastic relationship that most men actually desire. Of course!

nilegettolrahc said:

GOOD GRIEF!

I'm not resistant to making anyone happy. But if calling her every day, and sending her flowers, chocolates, and love letters every day, and seeing her every day, and talking about how much she hates her work colleagues every day, and not allowing myself some 'me' time every now and again is what makes her happy then...

I'M OUT.

JasmineFire said:

Are you talking about a relationship? or Valentine's Day?
who says the things you listed are necessarily the ones that make a woman happy? They may help to get her to go out with you, but a long-term relationship is based on more than these superficial things.

How about: maturity, decency, co-operation and teamwork as well as affection, honesty, sincerity, kindness, patience, wanting to be together because you love to it, good sex (which you did not even mention!), listening,
These need to be reciprocated to make a relationship work. Both parties have to give and take.

papaa said:

Don'ts
-try to point out things that I lack when you lack in doing things also
-try to cut off the conversation without hearing my point of view after you have spoken
-ignore me
-make me feel left out of your life
-act like i don't have a life
-try to buy me
-take advantage
-don't call me every 5 minutes asking me "what are you doing?"

Do's
-make me feel like you want to be with me
-cook for me
-listen when i have a problem
-give plenty of kisses
-give plenty of hugs
-give plenty of love
-allow me to take the bill sometimes
-allow me to be my own person...
-be creatively romantic

nilegettolrahc said:

i don't start nagging until he stops doing the shit that he use to do to get me....

meltwithu said:

I work a lot so I feel your pain She just misses you, that's all. She should quit the nagging so you'll WANT to see her when you have time Then fuck you silly & let you have some peace & quiet... until you beg her to come fuck you silly again... & again...

It's hard when you have a demanding job/career. You definitely have to be w/ someone who's secure & has enough of a life of their own - if they have too much time to miss you & focus on your absense it gets ugly

I'm thinking of breaking things off with my boyfriend soon. He's just way too many of the "don't"s and not enough of the "do"s. Everytime I'm with him lately I can't help but think of the fun I could be having doing something else. Not necessarily with a new boy or girl, but in general. Watching a movie by myself is more appealling nowadays than spending time with D.

DON'T:

-be materialistic.
-be proud of living a sheltered, insulated existance and thinking it's a good thing.
-be violent
-hang on to mommy and daddy's authority when you're an adult. living at home is no excuse.
-be chauvanistic, homophobic, or heterosexist
-don't be innapropriately silly. know when something is to be taken seriously.
-be unable to make decisions. a relationship is supposed to be a partnership, not a dictatorship.

DO:

-think outside of yourself
-know how to have fun
-don't be old beyond your years. wise beyond is a great thing, acting like an old fart isn't. there's a difference.
-have a sense of humour
-have a sense of adventure
-have a social conscience. i can't deal with someone who thinks there's no reason he should know where the food bank is.
-be kind
[Edited 1/9/06 20:31pm]

YOU RAISE VALID POINTS

And I'm writing tongue-in-cheek on the most part...

Sure, over the long-term most of the attributes you listed will make for a strong relationship.

nilegettolrahc said:

How did I fail to mention that? Guess I haven't been staring at THAT picture long enough...

nilegettolrahc said:

* like the george michael album, you should try to "listen without prejudice" (rule for either party)

* laughter (but try not to make it be about their appearance)

.
[Edited 1/11/06 4:14am]

Don't try driving me down a one way street no matter how nice you think your car is.