Two old ladies are outside their nursing home,
having a drink and a smoke, when it starts to rain.
One of the old ladies pulls out a condom, cuts
off the end, puts it over her cigarette, and
continues smoking.

Maude: What in the hell is that?

Mable: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.

Maude: Where did you get it?

Mable: You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day, Maude hobbles herself into the local
drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she
wants a box of condoms.

The pharmacist, obviously embarrassed, looks at her
kind of strangely she is after all, over 80 years of age),
but very delicately asks what brand of condom she prefers.

"Doesn't matter Sonny, as long as it fits on a Camel."