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WEIRD SWEARING There's always a crazy uncle or neighbour that yells out something that makes you think afterwards..."what the hell?" 
I remember one neighbour having an argument with the council and coming out with this pearler. "They can blow it out their arse, and mine" 
Why they would need to blow it out his as well, he never bothered to explain. 
An uncle of mine used to get flustered when yelling out swear words, so they would sound like a swear word but usually come out gobilydook. Once when he found out his horse had come stone motherless last, he yelled out "Figing, flery, buttfuck!!!" 
Ok...so the last bit sounded a bit rude.
Any funny sayings from your family? | |
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althom said: There's always a crazy uncle or neighbour that yells out something that makes you think afterwards..."what the hell?"
I remember one neighbour having an argument with the council and coming out with this pearler. "They can blow it out their arse, and mine"
Why they would need to blow it out his as well, he never bothered to explain.
An uncle of mine used to get flustered when yelling out swear words, so they would sound like a swear word but usually come out gobilydook. Once when he found out his horse had come stone motherless last, he yelled out "Figing, flery, buttfuck!!!"
Ok...so the last bit sounded a bit rude.
Any funny sayings from your family? A mate of mine while pissed up once called a taxi driver a "twat wanker" when he tried to overcharge us | |
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mdiver said: A mate of mine while pissed up once called a taxi driver a "twat wanker" when he tried to overcharge us I bet that impressed the taxi driver. lol | |
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althom said: mdiver said: A mate of mine while pissed up once called a taxi driver a "twat wanker" when he tried to overcharge us I bet that impressed the taxi driver. lol Yeah he was real scared.....not | |
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My older relativez say 'shit' funny. They make a real emphasis on the 't'
It'z weird when my mum says 'fuck'...cause i have only ever heard her use dat word in recent yearz No hablo espanol,no! 
Pero hablo ingles..ssii muy muy bien... 
 "Come into my world..."
Missy Quote of da Month: "yeah, sure, that's cool...wait WHAT?! "  | |
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my mother-in-law always says "you bloody thing". So when my kids started saying that I knew who to blame  | |
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Reply to 'WEIRD SWEARING'
althom said: There's always a crazy uncle or neighbour that yells out something that makes you think afterwards..."what the hell?"
I remember one neighbour having an argument with the council and coming out with this pearler. "They can blow it out their arse, and mine"
Why they would need to blow it out his as well, he never bothered to explain.
An uncle of mine used to get flustered when yelling out swear words, so they would sound like a swear word but usually come out gobilydook. Once when he found out his horse had come stone motherless last, he yelled out "Figing, flery, buttfuck!!!"
Ok...so the last bit sounded a bit rude.
Any funny sayings from your family? | |
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I had an uncle-in-law who had a swearing that he used almost every time when he was genuinely fustrated & it served not only as a vent but also as a way of calming down.
He'd swing his fist down & yell, " Ga' dang it... ...If only I wuz good-looking!!" | |
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Illustrator said: I had an uncle-in-law who had a swearing that he used almost every time when he was genuinely fustrated & it served not only as a vent but also as a way of calming down.
He'd swing his fist down & yell, " Ga' dang it... ...If only I wuz good-looking!!" | |
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althom said: An uncle of mine used to get flustered when yelling out swear words, so they would sound like a swear word but usually come out gobilydook. Once when he found out his horse had come stone motherless last, he yelled out "Figing, flery, buttfuck!!!"
My sister does that too. A memorable gem: What...No....derrr...bitchy blah! "A Watcher scoffs at gravity!" | |
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meow85 said: althom said: An uncle of mine used to get flustered when yelling out swear words, so they would sound like a swear word but usually come out gobilydook. Once when he found out his horse had come stone motherless last, he yelled out "Figing, flery, buttfuck!!!"
My sister does that too. A memorable gem: What...No....derrr...bitchy blah! Was she drunk? lol | |
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My mom never swears (she's a lovely Christian lady  ) but lately some words have been popping into her vocabulary. She called my uncle a bastard (he is estranged from the family after he sued her, LONG story) in front of my sister and she got really mad. My mom was telling me the story and I suggested calling him a butthole instead. She said no because buttholes were good; I think she meant useful.
In any case,  I mean, like, where is the sun? | |
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Natsume said: My mom never swears (she's a lovely Christian lady
) but lately some words have been popping into her vocabulary. She called my uncle a bastard (he is estranged from the family after he sued her, LONG story) in front of my sister and she got really mad. My mom was telling me the story and I suggested calling him a butthole instead. She said no because buttholes were good; I think she meant useful.
In any case, "awful joke in reference to natsume's mother's butthole and the word 'good' so in hindsight I may as well have left the post there for all the editing this edit has actually acheived" edit [Edited 10/25/05 0:14am] | |
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Funny, but I don't recall anyone in my family using profanity of any type, even mild ones...lol | |
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Someone complained to me once that I should learn to swear, after an incident which I shall recount here.
A lovely english girl moved into my flat with me and we got along famously. One day I came home and she had left the tap on in the kitchen sink and the flat had flooded. She was on her hands and knees with all our towels trying to mop up, and she looked up at me, obviously quite upset. I said "Oh dear" She went off!!!! She swore and swore and said how can that be all I am going to say and that I should learn to swear properly. I am not very good at it. If I swear everybody always stares and laughs 
So fuck off. | |
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althom said: There's always a crazy uncle or neighbour that yells out something that makes you think afterwards..."what the hell?"
I remember one neighbour having an argument with the council and coming out with this pearler. "They can blow it out their arse, and mine"
Why they would need to blow it out his as well, he never bothered to explain.
An uncle of mine used to get flustered when yelling out swear words, so they would sound like a swear word but usually come out gobilydook. Once when he found out his horse had come stone motherless last, he yelled out "Figing, flery, buttfuck!!!"
Ok...so the last bit sounded a bit rude.
Any funny sayings from your family? Shut your cunt. | |
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Cloudbuster said: althom said: There's always a crazy uncle or neighbour that yells out something that makes you think afterwards..."what the hell?"
I remember one neighbour having an argument with the council and coming out with this pearler. "They can blow it out their arse, and mine"
Why they would need to blow it out his as well, he never bothered to explain.
An uncle of mine used to get flustered when yelling out swear words, so they would sound like a swear word but usually come out gobilydook. Once when he found out his horse had come stone motherless last, he yelled out "Figing, flery, buttfuck!!!"
Ok...so the last bit sounded a bit rude.
Any funny sayings from your family? Shut your cunt. When I told my middle child to hurry up and eat her dinner, she said "You can shove this broccoli up your arsehole, cunt-face! I'm not eating it, I think Mum boiled it in shite!" It wasn't even broccoli, it was cauliflower! She's only two-and-a-half! | |
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fathermcmeekle said: When I told my middle child to hurry up and eat her dinner, she said "You can shove this broccoli up your arsehole, cunt-face! I'm not eating it, I think Mum boiled it in shite!"
It wasn't even broccoli, it was cauliflower! She's only two-and-a-half! Your middle child is well trained. What else does she do?  | |
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Cloudbuster said: fathermcmeekle said: When I told my middle child to hurry up and eat her dinner, she said "You can shove this broccoli up your arsehole, cunt-face! I'm not eating it, I think Mum boiled it in shite!"
It wasn't even broccoli, it was cauliflower! She's only two-and-a-half! Your middle child is well trained. What else does she do? She can roll a joint! It's not the best, but she's getting better! | |
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fathermcmeekle said: She can roll a joint! It's not the best, but she's getting better!
Wonderful. You've got yourself a little treasure there. | |
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fathermcmeekle said: When I told my middle child to hurry up and eat her dinner, she said "You can shove this broccoli up your arsehole, cunt-face! I'm not eating it, I think Mum boiled it in shite!"
It wasn't even broccoli, it was cauliflower! She's only two-and-a-half! 
 I mean, like, where is the sun? | |
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Cloudbuster said: fathermcmeekle said: She can roll a joint! It's not the best, but she's getting better!
Wonderful. You've got yourself a little treasure there. I'm teaching her to steal! She can't be prosecuted due to her age. 
I just may have cracked the whole `having-to-work` thing! | |
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You BAT FASTARD!!! | |
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fathermcmeekle said: Cloudbuster said: Shut your cunt. When I told my middle child to hurry up and eat her dinner, she said "You can shove this broccoli up your arsehole, cunt-face! I'm not eating it, I think Mum boiled it in shite!" It wasn't even broccoli, it was cauliflower! She's only two-and-a-half! well, knock me down and fuck me if that child ain't a precocious little cunhild | |
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Natsume said: My mom never swears (she's a lovely Christian lady
) but lately some words have been popping into her vocabulary. She called my uncle a bastard (he is estranged from the family after he sued her, LONG story) in front of my sister and she got really mad. My mom was telling me the story and I suggested calling him a butthole instead. She said no because buttholes were good; I think she meant useful.
In any case, your mom sounds like quite the comedian | |
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I had a friend that used to say "Fuck me running" my answer would be... ummmm wouldnt that be a bit difficult? My sons mother used to say "Up thine with twine", one day the whole house went quiet when i called my cousin Marisol an "Asscactus" | |
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althom said: There's always a crazy uncle or neighbour that yells out something that makes you think afterwards..."what the hell?"
I remember one neighbour having an argument with the council and coming out with this pearler. "They can blow it out their arse, and mine"
Why they would need to blow it out his as well, he never bothered to explain.
An uncle of mine used to get flustered when yelling out swear words, so they would sound like a swear word but usually come out gobilydook. Once when he found out his horse had come stone motherless last, he yelled out "Figing, flery, buttfuck!!!"
Ok...so the last bit sounded a bit rude.
Any funny sayings from your family? My dad was a Hungarian truck driver and could swear in three languages...for a long time I had trouble sorting out what was English, what was Hungarian and what was Italian | |
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applekisses said: althom said: There's always a crazy uncle or neighbour that yells out something that makes you think afterwards..."what the hell?"
I remember one neighbour having an argument with the council and coming out with this pearler. "They can blow it out their arse, and mine"
Why they would need to blow it out his as well, he never bothered to explain.
An uncle of mine used to get flustered when yelling out swear words, so they would sound like a swear word but usually come out gobilydook. Once when he found out his horse had come stone motherless last, he yelled out "Figing, flery, buttfuck!!!"
Ok...so the last bit sounded a bit rude.
Any funny sayings from your family? My dad was a Hungarian truck driver and could swear in three languages...for a long time I had trouble sorting out what was English, what was Hungarian and what was Italian he'd swear in all 3?... at the same time? | |
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TheRealFiness said: applekisses said: My dad was a Hungarian truck driver and could swear in three languages...for a long time I had trouble sorting out what was English, what was Hungarian and what was Italian he'd swear in all 3?... at the same time? He'd combine them | |
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applekisses said: TheRealFiness said: he'd swear in all 3?... at the same time? He'd combine them Lmao thats gotta be one hell of a eartrip LOL cus for one ive never heard Hungarian spoken..( serious) Italian yes..but combined?..yikes | |
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