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Printableretina said: Lammastide said: and nearly my marriage because I'd finally -- after nearly a decade -- grown the balls (and the respect) to come out of the closet to my wife.
And your marriage still works despite this? Yes... even years later. And we're happy. Love, honesty, trust and faithful commitment go a LONG way.  Ὅσον ζῇς φαίνου
μηδὲν ὅλως σὺ λυποῦ πρὸς ὀλίγον ἐστὶ τὸ ζῆν τὸ τέλος ὁ χρόνος ἀπαιτεῖ.” | |
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Lammastide said: retina said: And your marriage still works despite this? Yes... even years later. And we're happy. Love, honesty, trust and faithful commitment go a LONG way. well i'd say she's a strong woman who really understands what love really is. | |
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Are you sure she still loves you ? Are you sure It's the One ? Does she worth excuses and good talk about your future ? Every Lady would be glad to receive flowers and have a talk with someone who's hooked. You have to talk to her, or her mother if you know her ? Or her father if you willy wanna something serious ? To her boyfriend if she has one ? Maybe you should call her ? | |
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virginie74 said: Are you sure she still loves you ? Are you sure It's the One ? Does she worth excuses and good talk about your future ? Every Lady would be glad to receive flowers and have a talk with someone who's hooked. You have to talk to her, or her mother if you know her ? Or her father if you willy wanna something serious ? To her boyfriend if she has one ? Maybe you should call her ?
If you love her that strong, she mite wait 4U2 act ? Ladies like that too. | |
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Yeah, this woman is probably right. For decades and decades and decades women have loved men to pursue them. It's insecurity on their part and part game playing. If you for whatever reason want her that bad keep playing her game. I wouldn't if i were you though. Move on. | |
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Teacher said: blackbob said: she wont talk to me.....i have sent her another big bunch of flowers, thats two in three days....after that, i will leave it for a week or two then i will try and talk to her.....if she is still not interested, then i will need to give up and move on Not weeks honey, make it months. If you love her that much she's worth it. You're a smart (except for going to stay at your ex's  ) man and a caring one, I don't think you'd fall in love with just anybody. Leave it alone for a while, in the long run a couple of months isn't that much. All the best  That's what I meant before about giving it time... months may be necessary. But I would tell her in advance what you're waiting for and that you will contact her again.That will give her time to think about you on her own. If it's really love it will stand the test of time. "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"-Dr Seuss
Pain is something to carry, like a radio...You should stand up for your right to feel your pain- Jim Morrison | |
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ok... you are the one who was wondering if it was ok to leave your partner because you weren't getting sex right??
forgive me but are you perhaps confusing the issues?? girlfriend gave you sex... and you say you love her yet are willing to find someone else in a few weeks if she doesn't come back to you??   She couldn't stop crying 'cause she knew he was gone to stay | |
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blackbob said: Lammastide said: I'm curious, though, what act is so reprehensible that you can't share it even anonymously via the internet?
...And if it's THAT bad, would you really expect her to forgive it? its a long story.....i left my partner because i wanted to be with her, i was staying in my friends flat for a month but during this time, she wasnt sure weather she wanted another relationship again so soon(her ex husband treated her badly and hit her) ...i took this into consideration and gave her some time to think, she decided she did want me and we went out for about 2 weeks before she suddenly went cold on me again and told me it was over.....i was floored by this and hit a real downer and decided to go back to my partner and to see my wee boy (but my partner and me are over)...after a few days, she contacts me and tells me she is so sorry and misses me and wants to try again.....i am delighted and go and see her for the next few days but i had not yet moved back into my friends house at this point, i just had not got round to it. .....anyway she found out that i had not moved back into my pals flat, i was still staying at my ex partners house and since then, she does not want to know me..... .....the thing is, she has messed me about for weeks while i am sitting in my pals flat and then tells me its over, i know i lied but i think there are mitagating circumstances behind it.....she knows i am not sleeping with my ex partner but she still wont forgive me.... ..... .... i know some of you might read this and say she is not worth the hassle or it is a complete mess but i do love her to bits 
[Edited 10/6/05 2:37am] [Edited 10/6/05 2:38am] [Edited 10/6/05 2:41am] You should reread what you just wrote and take a step back. There is A LOT of drama already. I think you did the right thing by apologizing and trying to right the wrong. She needs to step up now. Christian Zombie Vampires | |
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Byron said: Lammastide said: I'm not a girl, but I'm gay,so at this time of night, I'm the best you'll get.
If you love her, you can show her how much by respecting her wishes. If things are meant to work out -- later -- let her initiate it. You've already communicated in words and deed how you feel. Definitely... ...Love isn't about what you can get from someone...it's about what you can give to someone. No matter what it is.
Respect her wishes, and keep her in your heart, thoughts and prayers. Don't try to figure out how to get her back...just try to figure out the best way to love her. .. [Edited 10/6/05 2:24am] True 
Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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moderatorblackbob said: Teacher said: Not weeks honey, make it months. If you love her that much she's worth it. You're a smart (except for going to stay at your ex's ) man and a caring one, I don't think you'd fall in love with just anybody. Leave it alone for a while, in the long run a couple of months isn't that much. All the best hi jen  ...i cant wait months...it is killing me....i am feeling very insecure , i left my family to try and have a future with her...that took a helluva lot for me to do...i love my wee boy more than life itself ..i will have to try and kill the pain by finding someone else in a few weeks...i know that is a rebound but i cant wait months, i am struggling with a couple of days....
[Edited 10/6/05 8:34am] Yes you CAN wait for months, I know EXACTLY how you feel though cos I pined for the same guy for 5 fucking years. There seemed to be days when I couldn't go on living, but those days got fewer in between eventually. I feel that what this woman is doing is seeing if you screw up again, so you need to NOT SCREW UP AGAIN. Wait a while, write down your rambling love thoughts if you have to get them out of your system (I do and then go back years later and fall over laughing), or chat online to occupy the time. Talk on the phone, do whatever but don't go for the rebound!!! Hear?  | |
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I agree with the majority of the people here: if you really love each other, things will work out fine, but you can't pressure this. Sounds like you both need some time on your own, otherwise you will drag your personal problems into your relationship. No matter how much you love each other, these things are heart-breaking. So breathe, go out, be honest with yourself and later on, if it's really love, you'll see each other again.
Best of luck to you !  | |
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shellyevon said: Teacher said: Not weeks honey, make it months. If you love her that much she's worth it. You're a smart (except for going to stay at your ex's ) man and a caring one, I don't think you'd fall in love with just anybody. Leave it alone for a while, in the long run a couple of months isn't that much. All the best That's what I meant before about giving it time... months may be necessary. But I would tell her in advance what you're waiting for and that you will contact her again.That will give her time to think about you on her own. If it's really love it will stand the test of time.  You know he's a man though, so you gotta say months if that's what you mean... remember how often they think about sex  | |
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rob, darling,
absence makes the heart grow fonder,leave her alone for a while and she may come back to you, too many flowers and too many sorry's makes you look guilty,which you're not. your so lovely,i hope it works out for you. x | |
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lovemachine said: Byron said: Definitely... ...Love isn't about what you can get from someone...
I don't know about that...I just got a new Columbia winter coat from Amy  -Dean is the cheese to my macaroni- | |
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brownsugar said: Lammastide said: Yes... even years later. And we're happy. Love, honesty, trust and faithful commitment go a LONG way. well i'd say she's a strong woman who really understands what love really is. I'm blessed beyond belief.Ὅσον ζῇς φαίνου
μηδὲν ὅλως σὺ λυποῦ πρὸς ὀλίγον ἐστὶ τὸ ζῆν τὸ τέλος ὁ χρόνος ἀπαιτεῖ.” | |
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Lammastide said: brownsugar said: well i'd say she's a strong woman who really understands what love really is. I'm blessed beyond belief. amazing! | |
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thanks to everyone for all your great advice , its good to know i have some good pals here i can talk to  [Edited 10/7/05 0:39am] | |
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Definitely... ...Love isn't about what you can get from someone...it's about what you can give to someone. No matter what it is.
Respect her wishes, and keep her in your heart, thoughts and prayers. Don't try to figure out how to get her back...just try to figure out the best way to love her. .. [Edited 10/6/05 2:24am] [/quote] agreed Be Joyful | |
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emm said: ok... you are the one who was wondering if it was ok to leave your partner because you weren't getting sex right??
forgive me but are you perhaps confusing the issues?? girlfriend gave you sex... and you say you love her yet are willing to find someone else in a few weeks if she doesn't come back to you?? i am hurting badly!!!.....i cant sit and let it continue to affect my whole life....i will give her a few weeks , after that ,as far as i am concerned , it will be over for good...i must try and get her out my mind somehow so i need to go and try and have some fun...it is too early right now but in a few weeks, i will have to or i will go crazy!!!.....as far as sex is concerned.....there is nothing wrong with leaving someone you care about if there is no intimacy , that screws your head up big time, believe me! | |
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its very strange....i love her one moment and then that turns to anger towards her the next moment because i left my partner for her then she messed me about for weeks (i want you, i dont want you)and i gave up and went back to see my wee boy for a few days then she tells me she wants to see me again ,finds out i am back at my ex partners house and doesnt want to know me!!!....she has messed me about.....bloody women 
[Edited 10/7/05 1:55am] [Edited 10/13/05 7:51am] | |
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blackbob said: its very strange....i love her one moment and then that turns to anger towards her the next moment because she asked me to leave my partner for her then she messed me about for weeks (i want you, i dont want you)and i gave up and went back to see my wee boy for a few days then she tells me she wants to see me again ,finds out i am back at my ex partners house and doesnt want to know me!!!....she has messed me about.....bloody women
[Edited 10/7/05 1:55am] stay angry like this for a while rob it will do you good,and i agree give her a few weeks if she's not interested then move on,you're a goodlooking nice guy,you will get another girl in no time.in the mean time..get pissed on tequila...works for me. | |
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cammille said: blackbob said: its very strange....i love her one moment and then that turns to anger towards her the next moment because she asked me to leave my partner for her then she messed me about for weeks (i want you, i dont want you)and i gave up and went back to see my wee boy for a few days then she tells me she wants to see me again ,finds out i am back at my ex partners house and doesnt want to know me!!!....she has messed me about.....bloody women
[Edited 10/7/05 1:55am] stay angry like this for a while rob it will do you good,and i agree give her a few weeks if she's not interested then move on,you're a goodlooking nice guy,you will get another girl in no time.in the mean time..get pissed on tequila...works for me. You still with der guy with der glassez?  Do sumzing vundervul, peoplez may imitate it. Everyzing deep ist alzo zimple und can be reproduzed zimplee az long az itz referenz to der whole truth ist maintained. But what matters is not what is witty but what is true. | |
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blackbob said: i know some of you might read this and say she is not worth the hassle or it is a complete mess
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well just to let all my org friends know, she got the second bunch of flowers yesterday with a message from me saying 'i love u blah blah'....she texted me and told me to stop wasting my money, i was a bunnyboiler and i should move on!!!....no thank you....nothing....two weeks ago she told me she loved me!!.....she wasnt the woman i thought she was....i wouldnt even give her a couple of weeks .....how cold-hearted can you get?.....C YA!!
[Edited 10/8/05 5:31am] [Edited 10/8/05 5:32am] [Edited 10/8/05 5:32am] | |
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blackbob said: well just to let all my org friends know, she got the second bunch of flowers yesterday with a message from me saying 'i love u blah blah'....she texted me and told me to stop wasting my money, i was a bunnyboiler and i should move on!!!....no thank you....nothing....two weeks ago she told me she loved me!!.....she wasnt the woman i thought she was....i wouldnt even give her a couple of weeks .....how cold-hearted can you get?.....C YA!!
[Edited 10/8/05 5:31am] [Edited 10/8/05 5:32am] [Edited 10/8/05 5:32am] well, sorry to hear that..but look ath the bigger picture--had you ever married this chick, she probably would have taken you to the cleaners and made your life even more miserable. have a drink, hang out with some platonic friends and JUST DO YOU for a minute or two  you look better on your facebook page than you do in person  | |
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Don't listen to all the romantic crap that the women here are dishing out. It's fantasy. Go hang out with your buddies at a club or something. Where there are hot women. Get your mind off this one and go looking elsewhere. That's the best way to move on. No woman is worth this torture. And what makes matter worse? She would love to hear that it's torturing you. Don't let her have the satisfaction. Move on, Buddy. Move on. | |
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Text messages don't count. You should go over there to look her in her eye and tell her again that you are sorry might make a difference. Perhaps also tell her why it is that you lied, because if you lied because you thought it would prevent her from getting hurt, then she might understand. Any effort that is not you (text messages, e-mail, but also the flowers that you didn't bring to her doorstep yourself) are insignificant. The effort should come from you physically. I hope that she forgives you. | |
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billyjackbitch said: Text messages don't count. You should go over there to look her in her eye and tell her again that you are sorry might make a difference. Perhaps also tell her why it is that you lied, because if you lied because you thought it would prevent her from getting hurt, then she might understand. Any effort that is not you (text messages, e-mail, but also the flowers that you didn't bring to her doorstep yourself) are insignificant. The effort should come from you physically. I hope that she forgives you.
if I only knew where you live.....I'd bring flowers to your doorstep! | |
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billyjackbitch said: Text messages don't count. You should go over there to look her in her eye and tell her again that you are sorry might make a difference. Perhaps also tell her why it is that you lied, because if you lied because you thought it would prevent her from getting hurt, then she might understand. Any effort that is not you (text messages, e-mail, but also the flowers that you didn't bring to her doorstep yourself) are insignificant. The effort should come from you physically. I hope that she forgives you.
she thinks i am a bunnyboiler...i dont think going to see her would make any difference.....i have lost her...it is just so hard going from being in love with each other to being a bunnyboiler in the space of two weeks....it it so cruel....i just have to face up to it....it is probably for the best [Edited 10/9/05 9:55am] | |
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blackbob said: billyjackbitch said: Text messages don't count. You should go over there to look her in her eye and tell her again that you are sorry might make a difference. Perhaps also tell her why it is that you lied, because if you lied because you thought it would prevent her from getting hurt, then she might understand. Any effort that is not you (text messages, e-mail, but also the flowers that you didn't bring to her doorstep yourself) are insignificant. The effort should come from you physically. I hope that she forgives you.
she thinks i am a bunnyboiler...i dont think going to see her would make any difference.....i have lost her...i just have to face up to it....it is probably for the best |
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