http://news.yahoo.com/s/u...ermansskin



By Abigail Van Buren
Wed Sep 28, 8:07 PM ET



DEAR ABBY: I have been married to a wonderful woman, "Leora," for 35 years. We have five grown children any parent would be proud of. Throughout our marriage, I worked while Leora took care of the children. I retired about three months ago. Now I am home with Leora all the time and have just realized that she bathes only about three times a week. This has not only upset me, but also disgusts me!



I know she used to bathe the children every night when they were little, and she insisted they bathe regularly growing up. When I asked her about this, she said she has "always bathed when she needed it," and that might be nightly -- or not. She attributes this to being raised on a ranch where water was scarce. Abby, we live quite comfortably. The cost of water is not an issue.

I told her that people have to bathe daily in order to be clean. She asked if I could ever tell she hadn't bathed daily and the answer is no, but I know now, and it bothers me.

Please tell her that people have to bathe daily to remove dead skin cells, etc. She seems to think if I couldn't tell for 35 years that she hasn't bathed every day the topic is not an issue. It's getting to the point that I don't want to sleep in the same bed with her knowing she hasn't bathed that day. -- SEPARATE BEDROOMS IN THE FUTURE

DEAR SEPARATE BEDROOMS: You say you retired three months ago and now you're at home with your wife "all the time." If ever I heard about someone who needed to get out and find a hobby, do volunteer work or start a new business, it is you. For the sake of your marriage, please stop obsessing about your wife's hygiene.

For people with oily skin, or in professions where their skin becomes sweaty or soiled, a daily bath is a must. However, for people with dry or delicate skin, a sponge bath may do the job very well. If you haven't noticed until now that your wife didn't bathe every day, it's time for you to ask yourself why you are digging for trouble. At the rate you're going, you could wind up with more than separate bedrooms.



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DEAR ABBY: My fiance, "John," wears women's underwear and hose. He likes it, and I realize it doesn't mean he's gay. That's not the problem.

His ex-wife, "Anita," insists on starting conversations with me about it, preferably within earshot of others. She asked, in front of their attorneys after a recent court hearing, if I "liked" the fact that John wears women's silk panties! (She owes child support and doesn't feel a need to pay it.)

I realize Anita is doing this to embarrass John and me, and I don't know what to do when she starts these "conversations." I've never met anyone so cynical, defensive, verbally abusive and in need of counseling. She's also an alcoholic in denial, but she doesn't have to be drunk to start these conversations. This is one of the reasons Anita doesn't have custody of their minor children.

I have tried ignoring her, but she'll stand there and talk to the back of my head, and the comments get increasingly personal and intrusive. How can I stop Anita in her tracks? -- EMBARRASSED IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR EMBARRASSED: One way to stop her would be to turn around, look her in the eye and say, "Anita, I know you are bitter and angry, but the kind of underwear he chooses is up to him and is longer your business. So knock it off." And then smile.



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DEAR ABBY: I'll be brief. Can a person get an STD from oral sex? -- NEEDS TO KNOW IN ORANGE COUNTY

DEAR NEEDS TO KNOW: Yes, and that is why it is so important to know the person and his or her health status before beginning a sexual relationship.



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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.



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To order "How to Write Letters for All Occasions," send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)

Um. Hasn't Abby been dead for some time now?

meow85 said:

Did you read the bottom of the thread?