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My Dear Wife >>TO MY DEAR WIFE:
>>During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. >>I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten >>days. >>The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often: >>54 times the sheets were clean >>17 times it was too late >>49 times you were too >>tired >>20 times it was too hot >>15 times you pretended to be sleep >>22 times you had a headache >>17 times you were afraid of waking the baby >>16 times you said you were too sore >>12 times it was the wrong time of the month >>19 times you had to get up early >>9 times you said weren't in the mood >>7 times you were sunburned >>6 times you were watching the late show >>5 times you didn't want to mess up your new hairdo >>3 times you said the neighbors would hear us >>9 times you said your mother would hear us >>Of the 36 times I did succeed, the activity was not satisfactory >>because: >>6 times you just laid there >>8 times you reminded me there's a crack in the ceiling >>4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with >>7 times I had to >>wake you and tell you I finished >>1 time I was afraid I had hurt you because I felt you move | |
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Mach said: >>TO MY DEAR WIFE:
>>During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. >>I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten >>days. >>The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often: >>54 times the sheets were clean >>17 times it was too late >>49 times you were too >>tired >>20 times it was too hot >>15 times you pretended to be sleep >>22 times you had a headache >>17 times you were afraid of waking the baby >>16 times you said you were too sore >>12 times it was the wrong time of the month >>19 times you had to get up early >>9 times you said weren't in the mood >>7 times you were sunburned >>6 times you were watching the late show >>5 times you didn't want to mess up your new hairdo >>3 times you said the neighbors would hear us >>9 times you said your mother would hear us >>Of the 36 times I did succeed, the activity was not satisfactory >>because: >>6 times you just laid there >>8 times you reminded me there's a crack in the ceiling >>4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with >>7 times I had to >>wake you and tell you I finished >>1 time I was afraid I had hurt you because I felt you move  I actually have a friend that tells her husband that its clean sheet night so they can't ..... | |
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Ocean said: Mach said: >>TO MY DEAR WIFE:
>>During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. >>I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten >>days. >>The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often: >>54 times the sheets were clean >>17 times it was too late >>49 times you were too >>tired >>20 times it was too hot >>15 times you pretended to be sleep >>22 times you had a headache >>17 times you were afraid of waking the baby >>16 times you said you were too sore >>12 times it was the wrong time of the month >>19 times you had to get up early >>9 times you said weren't in the mood >>7 times you were sunburned >>6 times you were watching the late show >>5 times you didn't want to mess up your new hairdo >>3 times you said the neighbors would hear us >>9 times you said your mother would hear us >>Of the 36 times I did succeed, the activity was not satisfactory >>because: >>6 times you just laid there >>8 times you reminded me there's a crack in the ceiling >>4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with >>7 times I had to >>wake you and tell you I finished >>1 time I was afraid I had hurt you because I felt you move I actually have a friend that tells her husband that its clean sheet night so they can't .....for goodness sakes! 
that's what clean sheets are for  | |
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charlottegelin said: Ocean said: I actually have a friend that tells her husband that its clean sheet night so they can't .....for goodness sakes!
that's what clean sheets are for Yeah I didn't get it eithier | |
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Why the excuses Just hump damn it!   No hablo espanol,no! 
Pero hablo ingles..ssii muy muy bien... 
 "Come into my world..."
Missy Quote of da Month: "yeah, sure, that's cool...wait WHAT?! "  | |
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Ocean said: Mach said: >>TO MY DEAR WIFE:
>>During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. >>I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten >>days. >>The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often: >>54 times the sheets were clean >>17 times it was too late >>49 times you were too >>tired >>20 times it was too hot >>15 times you pretended to be sleep >>22 times you had a headache >>17 times you were afraid of waking the baby >>16 times you said you were too sore >>12 times it was the wrong time of the month >>19 times you had to get up early >>9 times you said weren't in the mood >>7 times you were sunburned >>6 times you were watching the late show >>5 times you didn't want to mess up your new hairdo >>3 times you said the neighbors would hear us >>9 times you said your mother would hear us >>Of the 36 times I did succeed, the activity was not satisfactory >>because: >>6 times you just laid there >>8 times you reminded me there's a crack in the ceiling >>4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with >>7 times I had to >>wake you and tell you I finished >>1 time I was afraid I had hurt you because I felt you move I actually have a friend that tells her husband that its clean sheet night so they can't ..... | |
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i  to nasty up clean sheets | |
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