My last somewhat girlfriend was WAAAAAY out of my league. It kind of intimidated me a bit.

PREDOMINANT said:

well, someone's got to do the manual labour!

It find it's always a random thing for me.

I've dated very nice looking women, then so-so women. Looks end taking a back seat to personality.

Most of the men that dig me, are drop dead good looking though.

AsianBomb777 said:

jerseykrs said:

I think my taste gravitates to what would probably be considered in my league. Whether consciously or not, I'm not sure. My taste in pure aesthetics alone tends to have more to do with a certain style and carriage than physical features.
That said, I think the concept of "league" can be tricky. How many of us can accurately assess what league we are in? And more importantly, would others see it the same way? I don't know... A guy I once expressed interest in after months of crushing on him in secret and dropping subtle hints and I finally had to hit him on the head with it was in awe, saying he never would have guessed that I liked him cause he thought I was way out of his league. I really didn't know what to say to that cause I just found it ludicrous. Probably a bit of self-consciousness on both our parts. I'd never really thought of anyone in terms of in or out of my league before that. More like I don't find myself all that attracted to folks who would be considered way out of my league. Maybe it's a pre-emptive way of avoiding rejection, but it's also sincere.

That said, I have sort of dated out of my league. There has been one boy who I found so aesthetically handsome, sexy, yummy that it was almost intimidating. But I got over the intimidating part pretty quickly.

AsianBomb777 said:

Whitney got braces?!

And you know, I think 'league', being the superficial entity that it is, has as much to do with wealth, status and education as it does looks.

I think there's a lot of truth in what you say about targeting those in your league. It isn't that often you see couples and think that one of them is totally out of their depth. Occasionally, sure. But not that often.

The following may sound cold-hearted and clinical, but hey: I think i've dated a number of women falling across a range of attractiveness, but I think they have all fallen within what I would broadly call 'beautiful'. Whether just scraping into physically beautiful, or being very physically beautiful. (Of course, this is all subjective & i wouldn't rule out anything, because you fall for who you fall for ) And the selection is probably both conscious and subconscious on my part. Yes, we are all superficial beings to some extent, not least because subconsciously, we want good genes in a mate, and we want likelihood of procreation (not everyone adheres to that, and many override the instinct, but that's the general biological thrust). I'm no different. And i freely accept that i'm probably more superficial than others, unfortunately.

When it comes to a relationship though, then other things become more important than looks if you're concentrating on the relationship's longevity. But that is incorporated into the equation too. It's not just 'within my league' looks-wise; it's 'within my league' everythingelse-wise, too.

Right, i've been pompous enough for a while, now.

MartyMcFly said:

[Flame bait snip - luv4u]..... ) I'm sorry.....
[Edited 9/27/05 6:19am]

If I see someone I am really, really attracted to - I mean, the kind of guy that just stops me in my tracks and causes me to take a sharp breath - no, I don't approach him. I'm not confident enough. And usually, I justify my cowardice by convincing myself that he's gay, or has a really hot supermodel girlfriend.

But if I see someone I'm attracted to, who I think is good-looking but doesn't make my heart explode, I may approach them and/or be more receptive to their advances because I feel more at-ease.

I don't know, it's complicated. There are too many factors involved.

If I ever put myself in a league, please shoot me.

As you grow in life, those type of things become very superficial..

That doesn't mean that I don't look at a handsome men, can I have him? Yes, if that is what I desire.

sag10 said:

Fauxie said:

I've never thought of you in this way. Some people would have felt intimidated talking to the girls you describe, so you were confident in this even if your self image was poor. The fact that you didn't have any potential dating issues on the agenda must have made it easier to talk to them also.


we do filter out visual images, including people I think, otherwise we would be bombarded with too much information, in the same way we filter out sounds too. Maybe the ones that stand out initially and that are not filtered out are the ones that physically match us. I might look at a good looking guy in the same way I might admire anything else I find beautiful, but that doesnt mean I envisage a happy ever after with him. It might be more of a transient moment, and something to be admired from afar. I think good looking people should be placed on plinths in museums for us to look at but not touch. Just kidding. Also we tend to assume they must be arrogant, which is wrong imo.

BTW, I'm EXACTLY like fauxie, horrible self image.....I have serious issues when it comes to the other sex.

I've seen the prettiest girls date the biggest ugliest nerds
what's with this 'dating outside your league' ?

Dewrede said:

But do you ever see it the other way around?

And as for what a 'league' is that you're dating outside of...well, there are different leagues:

Sober league. (pretty narrow)

1 Pint league. (slightly broader)

2 pint league. (even broader)

...and so on, until about 6 or 7 pints, and then you're not so much talking about leagues, as species.

CarrieMpls said:

not as often , tho' i think

I don't stop for one second to consider my "attractiveness" if I meet someone I find attractive (and my standards are generally ridiculously high ). I engage them in conversation and, if they're interesting, I pursue it (or they pursue me ).

I've dated actresses, models, whatever...there is no one "outside my league". There are, however, people whose intellectual capacity is below my league.

TheFrog said:

TheFrog said:

so you're saying pretty frogs only?

LleeLlee said:

Ace said:

well, then.

XxAxX said:

pretty frogs to me anyway, yep that is the way it's been in the past. Which is superficial, i know.

XxAxX said:

see, i know this to be true.

except the species bit.

TheFrog said:

many years ago i had a college friend, sarah, who swore off men in favor of her clothes dryer. yes, the warm, vibrating, tireless clothes dryer

in her case, the difference between animate/inanimate didn't even enter into things....

i wonder how she's doing these days.....

After many “trial relationships.” When I was in my early thirties I started looking for the woman I would share the rest of my life with. At that point in my life I felt that physical appearance was not important. She turned out to be the most beautiful woman I’ve met inside and out, and after ten years she still is.

CptMorgan said:

even when you let the air out of her????









kidding

XxAxX said: