to my boyfriend.

Here's the story. We've been together for almost three years and have been living together since January. I already know I want to spend the rest of my life with him, and we've already discussed it. Marriage was brought up by him, and he already told me he wants to get engaged. He's been telling his family and friends that he wants to marry me someday. The only thing is my parents. They like him, but we don't know how they would react. My father likes him a lot, but I think he's hoping I come back home because they think I'm too young and need to experience more things than to settle with one person yet. I'm not too concerned with that; I know what I want. My boyfriend, Chris, wants to respect my father and just give it a little more time before we make it official. He wants to ask my father's permission, which really makes me happy because I know he cares. Basically, Chris has asked me to marry him, but it's kind of "our little secret".

But I don't want to wait! I keep thinking that I should just take things as they come and enjoy the way things are going now, but I want to make it official. I was kinda expecting a ring on my birthday, which I didn't get, and I just really want to get married. Why wait? I know this is what we want.

What do you guys think if I proposed myself by getting Chris a ring? Would it be disrespectful to my father? Should I just let things flow and wait for him to "really" pop the question?

I'd wait for him to ask you.

I can only say what I'd feel, and I'd always feel resentment if I "had to ask" the guy. I'm an old fashioned girl though.

Tell him to sign up for an account here and I'll propose to him for you...you can orgnote me what you want me to say and I will say it.

I mean if you're shy or something.

2the9s said:

2the9s said:

Sweeny79 said:

See, that's kinda what I'm thinking! I do want to get engaged soon and am getting a little impatient for it, I guess. On one hand, I kinda want to do it, but on the other, I want the whole "get down on his knees with the little velvet box" thing for myself.

theVelvetRoper said:

Wait then!

I say go for it. Especially if your parents are going to be irritated. Then they can't blame him.

tackam said:

Right, which is why I wanted to do it myself.

How old are you that you've been living with him for 3 years? Your parents are talking about maturity not age and if not, they might be hoping you find someone else.
I'm not sure why you're in such a rush to get married? The event, starting a family ....etc.

If you can answer those honestly, then you might tell your parents and get on with it. Don't do it without their knowledge. It would always be a negative associated with something that should be a positive.

Ask him. It's about time that women grew some guts and did it. Don't listen to the women that are still stuck in the 1950's and are still dreaming about their dream man to get down on one knee and ask. Those women are lost in their own fantasy world and need to grow up. Ask him.

Rev said:

As I said, I've been with him for 3 years, and have been living with him since January. The reason why I want to get married is not the event of a wedding or even to have kids right away, but because I know that this is how we want things to be and that we want to be together. I just want to make it official and be his wife, since we're already living that way and are happy. I guess I can be satisfied the way things are now and maybe not necessarily in a rush, but it's what I feel in my heart and what I want to do.

Spats said:

See, then I get a positive response like that and I'm all for it!

If you can answer those honestly, then you might tell your parents and get on with it. Don't do it without their knowledge. It would always be a negative associated with something that should be a positive.[/quote]

As I said, I've been with him for 3 years, and have been living with him since January. The reason why I want to get married is not the event of a wedding or even to have kids right away, but because I know that this is how we want things to be and that we want to be together. I just want to make it official and be his wife, since we're already living that way and are happy. I guess I can be satisfied the way things are now and maybe not necessarily in a rush, but it's what I feel in my heart and what I want to do.[/quote]

That's cool.
What about your parents wanting you to wait? Do you think they're just worried.If it's important to him to speak with your Dad and you appreciate that give him the chance. Then you can you two plan your life together.

Rev said:

As I said, I've been with him for 3 years, and have been living with him since January. The reason why I want to get married is not the event of a wedding or even to have kids right away, but because I know that this is how we want things to be and that we want to be together. I just want to make it official and be his wife, since we're already living that way and are happy. I guess I can be satisfied the way things are now and maybe not necessarily in a rush, but it's what I feel in my heart and what I want to do.[/quote]

That's cool.
What about your parents wanting you to wait? Do you think they're just worried.If it's important to him to speak with your Dad and you appreciate that give him the chance. Then you can you two plan your life together. [/quote]

Thanks for the advice.