I was wondering about something, so I thought I'd ask you all.

I gotta tell you the story first. This friend of mine owns a dance studio, and I take classes plus occasionally assist her or help her take her students to conventions, etc. Oh about a year ago or maybe more, her students were crushin on this dancer/instructor, and my friend told them and me since I was there that he had a long-time girlfriend. Well, I just found out that the guy allegedly had a relationship with another guy, so I guess that would make this dancer bi, if any of it is true at all. I wasn't shocked coz I don't know this dancer dude personally, and it's not my business anyway. But it's just weird, for lack of a better word, in a way coz so many of the girls just love him and think he's straight. Plus, I'm thinking all along that the guy is straight with this girlfriend when he actually likes men, too.

Well, it got me to thinking. I've known gay people and hetero people, but I've never known, at least I don't think I have, anyone who is bi. What I want to know from those of you who are bi is that do you see yourself in a long-term or maybe even life-long relationship in either a gay or hetero relationship?? Or does gender not matter at all as long as you love the person, so it's just a matter with whom you fall in love???

Or do you NOT see yourself settling down at all??? I just added that option coz a number of hetero and gay people don't settle down with anyone "for life." Ya know, some people DON'T PREFER being in a relationship,and it doesn't have anything to do with sexuality. I was just wondering about "bi-sexuality" as far as long-term relationships are concerned coz for people who are either hetero or gay, their life partners would be gender specific.

A few male friends of mine claimed to be bi in the military.
But they seemed like oversexed heteros who flaunted their sexuality admitting to be bi just to fit into the "in" crowd. I never saw any of them do anything remotely "same sex".

Of the girls, I knew quite a few who claimed to be bi that DID sleep with other girls and showed no preference other than they seemed to give more closely with the girls, and treated men like standby fucks.


Of course, the military and being in your 20's is a very slutty time.

I have known more girls that guys who are bi. Basically they are comfortable with both. ANd are ok to explore that side openly.

Guys mostly hide the bi part and it really only comes out when in a situation. Many guys don't think about that part of themselves, it's a shame I think as it gives them no perspective on it.

Then after all of that, I live in San Francisco, where its ok to be just about anything.

Thanks for responding.

Yeah, I just wondered if gender mattered in long-term relationships for bi-sexual people. I guess it just depends on the person. Some might prefer to be with their own gender but also be sexually attracted to the opposite. While others just fall in love, and gender doesn't matter.

This is a little off-topic, but there was a lesbian friend of mine who had a crush on me once, but I'm just not "into" women in that way. She was really sweet, funny, and talented, but I just didn't feel anything sexual for her although I really enjoyed her company as a friend. I finally had to talk to her about it. Luckily we were still able still to remain friends coz she was a really great person, but it was a little awkward at first. For me though, I have always been attracted to men sexually even though I can appreciate a woman's beauty and friendship.
[Edited 6/30/05 19:31pm]