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Kevin Smith Reviews Star Wars Episode III!!! Okay folks, read at your own risk. I thought some of my fellow geeks would want to take a gander at theis. I actually didn't read much of it, because I want to have at least a few surprises when the movie hits. Still, from the little I did skim, it looks like Silent Bob liked the movie...alot!
"SITH" SPOILERS You've been warned... - "Revenge of the Sith" is, quite simply, fucking awesome. This is the "Star Wars" prequel the haters have been bitching for since "Menace" came out, and if they don't cop to that when they finally see it, they're lying. As dark as "Empire" was, this movie goes a thousand times darker - from the triggering of Order 66 (which has all the Shock Troopers turning on the Jedi Knights they've been fighting beside throughout the Clone Wars and gunning them down), to the jaw-dropping Anakin/Obi Wan fight on Mustafar (where - after cutting his legs and arm off, Ben leaves Skywalker burning alive on the shores of a lava river, with Anakin spitting venomous sentiments at his departing mentor), this flick is so satisfyingly tragic, you'll think you're watching "Othello" or "Hamlet". I saw a gorgeous digitally projected version of the flick, and lemme tell ya': this is a beautiful looking film. The opening space battle sequence is the best in any of the six "Star Wars" movies. Grievous and Kenobi's lightsaber duel is bad-ass, with Grievous rocking four sabers. The Clone Wars end rather early in the flick (about the halfway point), leaving the rest of the film to concentrate on Anakin's turn to the Dark Side, and the resulting slaughter of the Jedi. Perfect example of how dark shit gets: remember the Younglings - the kid Jedis in training from "Clones"? As a result of Order 66, when Anakin invades the Jedi Temple with an army of Clone Troopers, he enters the Council room to find a gaggle of said younglings hiding behind the seats. They see Anakin and emerge, asking "What should we do, Master Anakin?" The query's met with a stone-cold Anakin firing up his lightsaber. The next time you see the kids, Yoda's sifting through their corpses on the floor. Yes, it's just that dark - and rightfully so. This is the birth of Darth Vader we're talking about. The only comic moments in the flick are given to R2D2, and while good, they're all pretty few and far between; the order of the day is dark, dark, dark. Ian McDiarmid and Ewan McGregor steal the show, but Hayden Christensen silences any naysayers who wrote him off as too whiney in "Clones". This is the flick that feels closest to Episodes 4, 5, and 6, because - for the first time since "Return of the Jedi" - there is a clear villain. And for all the shadow-play Palpatine has been upto in the last two flicks, his treachery is about as subtle as John Williams' score in "Sith." Whether he's slowly drawing Anakin toward the Dark Side during an opera/performance art piece with his promise of the Sith's power of life over death, or he's engaged in a balls-to-the-wall lightsaber duel in the Senate with Yoda, his "Little, green friend" (his words, not mine - which I kinda dug, because, interestingly, I think it's the first time anyone's acknowledged that Yoda is green in any of the "Star Wars" flicks), this is the Emperor's movie. The last fifteen minutes dovetail nicely into Episode 4 (or just plain "Star Wars" for you non-geeks), and the movie is full of link-up moments as well. - At flick's end, Threepio and Artoo are given to Captain Antilles (with the caveat that the Protocol's memory be wiped). - The twins, natch, are split up. Leia heads to Alderann with Bail Organa, and Obi Wan hands Luke over to Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru (indeed, the closing shot is Owen holding Luke while looking out over the setting suns of Tatooine - mimicking the shot of the adult Luke doing the same in "Star Wars", complete with callback cue from Williams). - After he succumbs to the Dark Side, Anakin tries to convine Padme that he can overthrow Palpatine, and together, he and Padme can rule the galaxy as husband and wife. - Vader and the Emperor stand beside a younger Grand Moff Tarkin on the bridge of a Star Destroyer, overlooking the earliest construction stage of the Death Star. - Yoda telling Obi Wan that, as he heads to Tatooine to hand over Luke and go into exile, that he should spend his time learning to commune with those who've crossed over to the next stage of life, as Yoda maintains he's been doing with Qui Gon (and Ben will later do with both Luke and Yoda, in "Empire" and "Jedi"). - And, hands-down, the best link-up to "Star Wars" moment that I enjoyed the most: Bail Organa and Yoda stepping into the hallway of the Rebel Blockade Runner that opened "Star Wars". Unlike all the high-tech CGI wizardry of the rest of the prequel Trilogy, this is a low-tech looking set, right out of circa '77, and for some reason, it really captured my imagination. I mean, this is the same exact hallway in which we got our first look at Vader, oh so many years ago, and I appreciated the hell out of Mr. Lucas including it - because it really felt like a nod to the hardcores. Look, this is a movie I was genetically predisposed to love. I remember being eight years old, and reading in "Starlog" that Darth Vader became the half-man/half-machine he was following a duel with Ben Kenobi that climaxed with Vader falling into molten lava. Now, twenty six years later, I finally got to see that long-promised battled - and it lived up to any expectation I still held. I was sad to see the flick end, but happy to know it's not the end of the "Star Wars" universe entirely (I've read stuff about a TV show...). "Sith" doesn't happen; "Sith" rules. Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) | |
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this sounds truly excellent | |
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XxAxX said: this sounds truly excellent
(In best Bill & Ted voice) Yes! Most Excellent! Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) | |
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JediMaster said: XxAxX said: this sounds truly excellent
(In best Bill & Ted voice) Yes! Most Excellent! now if only they could work You Know Who in there somehow i'd see it like, eight times in a row | |
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XxAxX said: JediMaster said: (In best Bill & Ted voice) Yes! Most Excellent! now if only they could work You Know Who in there somehow i'd see it like, eight times in a row Would he be Darth Saget? Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) | |
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JediMaster said: XxAxX said: now if only they could work You Know Who in there somehow i'd see it like, eight times in a row Would he be Darth Saget? well i don't think bob has it in him to play such a dark role. besides, that darth costume would cover up too much of bob. come to think of it bob deserves his very own movie. a role where he could unleash his inner jedi tarzan | |
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I JUST saw the link from over at theforce.net, and here I thought I would be the first to post Kevin's review. heh.... | |
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TMPletz said: I JUST saw the link from over at theforce.net, and here I thought I would be the first to post Kevin's review. heh....
So what did you think of the review? Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) | |
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JediMaster said: TMPletz said: I JUST saw the link from over at theforce.net, and here I thought I would be the first to post Kevin's review. heh....
So what did you think of the review? Hard to say, I like Kevin but he is a Lucas company man now. | |
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I'm so excited I feel like I'm 7 again. | |
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Yeah, I saw this yesterday too and I almost wet myself.
My tickets have been ordered and vacation days have been taken. I shall revel in geekdom from 5/18 thru 5/22. | |
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Thanks for posting this.
I’ve always found the stories to be a bit simplistic…but for some reason have always held out hope for series. This review gives me that hope. (I’m older now, so I appreciate darker and more adult themes. I could never get into the Ewoks or Jar-Jar) Not that anyone cares but…. I was in elementary school when THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK came out. There was a boy who was lucky enough to be taken to the midnight screening of the movie immediately upon opening. That kid was the shit…for like a week. | |
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DuckPurple said: Thanks for posting this.
You're welcome I’ve always found the stories to be a bit simplistic…but for some reason have always held out hope for series.
They are simplistic on the surface, I agree (its patterned after myths & fairy tales, so it should be), but there are a lot of things going on underneath that are quite cool. This review gives me that hope.
(I’m older now, so I appreciate darker and more adult themes. I could never get into the Ewoks or Jar-Jar) I think that has been the problem so many fans have had. They grew up, and expected the movies to do the same. While I didn't have a problem with Lucas making these a bit kid-friendly, there are times when its really annoying. That having been said, all the kids I know love Jar Jar and the Ewoks, so I guess they work on that level. Of course, when I was a kid, I had no problem with the Ewoks, so it is a matter of perspective. Not that anyone cares but….
I was in elementary school when THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK came out. There was a boy who was lucky enough to be taken to the midnight screening of the movie immediately upon opening. That kid was the shit…for like a week. I was in third grade, and had a very similar experience. This kid came back from the midnight screening, and proceeded to tell me how Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker's dad!!! Still pissed at that kid! ----- [Edited 4/28/05 12:21pm] Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) | |
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has anyone read the full review from kevin's site?
Space for sale... | |
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sosgemini said: has anyone read the full review from kevin's site?
I thought that was what Jedi posted at the top of this thread. | |
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OdysseyMiles said: sosgemini said: has anyone read the full review from kevin's site?
I thought that was what Jedi posted at the top of this thread. oops..maybe it is... Space for sale... | |
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OdysseyMiles said: Yeah, I saw this yesterday too and I almost wet myself.
My tickets have been ordered and vacation days have been taken. I shall revel in geekdom from 5/18 thru 5/22. strange, i'm doing this also. | |
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sosgemini said: OdysseyMiles said: I thought that was what Jedi posted at the top of this thread. oops..maybe it is... | |
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The storybooks and comics always come out before the movie... why? I read the comic of Empire Strikes Back in the mall before I saw the movie... I have no idea what it would be like to find out the father revelation in context. My art book: http://www.lulu.com/spotl...ecomicskid
VIDEO WORK: http://sharadkantpatel.com MUSIC: https://soundcloud.com/ufoclub1977 | |
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ufoclub said: The storybooks and comics always come out before the movie... why? I read the comic of Empire Strikes Back in the mall before I saw the movie... I have no idea what it would be like to find out the father revelation in context.
Its always irritated me that they do that. Where are you seeing it? (you're in Houston, right?) I've got tickets to the Midnight showing at the Edwards off I-10. [Edited 4/29/05 6:41am] Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) | |
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I haven't thought about buying tickets this early.... hmmmm. I was thinking of buying the soundtrack, when does that drop?
JediMaster said: ufoclub said: The storybooks and comics always come out before the movie... why? I read the comic of Empire Strikes Back in the mall before I saw the movie... I have no idea what it would be like to find out the father revelation in context.
Its always irritated me that they do that. Where are you seeing it? (you're in Houston, right?) I've got tickets to the Midnight showing at the Edwards off I-10. [Edited 4/29/05 6:41am] My art book: http://www.lulu.com/spotl...ecomicskid
VIDEO WORK: http://sharadkantpatel.com MUSIC: https://soundcloud.com/ufoclub1977 | |
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JediMaster said: TMPletz said: I JUST saw the link from over at theforce.net, and here I thought I would be the first to post Kevin's review. heh....
So what did you think of the review? I thought it was a great review, but I would have preferred he didn't give away a lot of the plot points even though I know them all since I've read the book already. | |
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ufoclub said: I haven't thought about buying tickets this early.... hmmmm. I was thinking of buying the soundtrack, when does that drop?
Tuesday. Comes with a bonus DVD that features a whole buncha videos of songs from the Saga. ---- [Edited 4/29/05 12:34pm] Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) | |
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TMPletz said: JediMaster said: So what did you think of the review? I thought it was a great review, but I would have preferred he didn't give away a lot of the plot points even though I know them all since I've read the book already. I agree, although I passed on reading the book. I already know more than I want to! Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) | |
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Last 'Star Wars' Movie Said Not for Kids By DAVID GERMAIN, AP Movie Writer
1 hour, 57 minutes ago SAN RAFAEL, Calif. - The Force lands in theaters a bit more forcefully in the final installment of George Lucas "Star Wars" tale. "Episode III — Revenge of the Sith" is the first "Star Wars" tale to receive a PG-13 rating. The movie was screened for reporters Tuesday night at Lucas' Skywalker Ranch, and the PG-13 rating — "for sci-fi violence and some intense images" — is well-deserved. The action is relentless and includes sequences more dark and disturbing than anything previously seen in the tragic Skywalker soap opera. Young Jedi knight Anakin Skywalker ( Hayden Christensen) completes his transformation into blackhearted villain Darth Vader with a bloodbath against old allies, the body count including a corridor of "youngling" corpses — Jedi children cut down by his light saber. Anakin is left gruesomely mutilated in a death duel with former mentor Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor). His surgical reclamation as the part-flesh, part-machine Vader is chillingly juxtaposed against the bleak childbirth scene of his wife, Padme Amidala (Natalie Portman), whose twins grow up to be heroes of the original "Star Wars" trilogy, Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia. Even cute and cuddly Jedi master Yoda takes his lumps, torched by the electroshock treatment dished out by the saga's puppetmaster, the evil emperor (Ian McDiarmid). The previous five "Star Wars" flicks all were rated PG, which carry the mild warning "parental guidance suggested," and that some scenes might be unsuitable for children. The PG-13 rating carries the alert "parents strongly cautioned" that some material could be inappropriate for those younger than 13. "We're getting a lot of flak from parents, a lot of people saying how can you do this? My children love these movies. Why can you not let them go see it?" Lucas told The Associated Press in a recent interview. "But I have to tell a story. I'm not making these, oddly enough, to be giant, successful blockbusters. I'm making them because I'm telling a story, and I have to tell the story I intended." Of course, the PG-13 rating does not prohibit children under 13 from seeing the film without an adult tagging along. And while it's not likely to make much of a dent in the movie's certain blockbuster status, the rating could give some parents pause. "These are pretty intense. Who should be allowed to see them should be left up to the parents, but at least they're warned that it's pretty intense," Lucas said. "And obviously, that's not a good business move." Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) | |
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cant fucking wait! | |
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Nerds from around the world will be out in force. What does Kevin Smith know about what a good movie is. Has he ever made one?lol | |
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JediMaster said: Last 'Star Wars' Movie Said Not for Kids By DAVID GERMAIN, AP Movie Writer
1 hour, 57 minutes ago SAN RAFAEL, Calif. - The Force lands in theaters a bit more forcefully in the final installment of George Lucas "Star Wars" tale. "Episode III — Revenge of the Sith" is the first "Star Wars" tale to receive a PG-13 rating. The movie was screened for reporters Tuesday night at Lucas' Skywalker Ranch, and the PG-13 rating — "for sci-fi violence and some intense images" — is well-deserved. The action is relentless and includes sequences more dark and disturbing than anything previously seen in the tragic Skywalker soap opera. Young Jedi knight Anakin Skywalker ( Hayden Christensen) completes his transformation into blackhearted villain Darth Vader with a bloodbath against old allies, the body count including a corridor of "youngling" corpses — Jedi children cut down by his light saber. Anakin is left gruesomely mutilated in a death duel with former mentor Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor). His surgical reclamation as the part-flesh, part-machine Vader is chillingly juxtaposed against the bleak childbirth scene of his wife, Padme Amidala (Natalie Portman), whose twins grow up to be heroes of the original "Star Wars" trilogy, Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia. Even cute and cuddly Jedi master Yoda takes his lumps, torched by the electroshock treatment dished out by the saga's puppetmaster, the evil emperor (Ian McDiarmid). The previous five "Star Wars" flicks all were rated PG, which carry the mild warning "parental guidance suggested," and that some scenes might be unsuitable for children. The PG-13 rating carries the alert "parents strongly cautioned" that some material could be inappropriate for those younger than 13. "We're getting a lot of flak from parents, a lot of people saying how can you do this? My children love these movies. Why can you not let them go see it?" Lucas told The Associated Press in a recent interview. "But I have to tell a story. I'm not making these, oddly enough, to be giant, successful blockbusters. I'm making them because I'm telling a story, and I have to tell the story I intended." Of course, the PG-13 rating does not prohibit children under 13 from seeing the film without an adult tagging along. And while it's not likely to make much of a dent in the movie's certain blockbuster status, the rating could give some parents pause. "These are pretty intense. Who should be allowed to see them should be left up to the parents, but at least they're warned that it's pretty intense," Lucas said. "And obviously, that's not a good business move." Aw, tell these parents to STFU! Take your annoying brats to a f-n Disney movie and let the grown ups enjoy themselves. Finally, Lucas is catering to adults. No more kiddie crap(Ewoks, Jar-Jar Binks, etc.) I'll bet these morons let their kids watch pro football & hockey. What's more intense than grown men smashing into each other at full speed? | |
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Thanks for posting this. I love when a person who makes movies and loves movies sound like the rest of us who love movies.
Star Wars and don't care but I'm not dressing up like a Wookie | |
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