lovemachine said: IMO the people who say that there are reasons to cheat and everyone makes mistakes etc. are just trying to justify the fact that they are a scummy partner to someone. I get so sick of hearing the reason I cheated is because I was depressed or I was happy or I was working too hard or blah blah blah. The reason you cheated is because you lack moral character and strength and in general are shitty to the person that you are supposed to love the most in the world.
And yes...if you cheat once you cannot with certainty say you will not do it again because you have already failed that test. Obviously if the right situation arrises you cannot be trusted. | |
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saintsation said: lovemachine said: IMO the people who say that there are reasons to cheat and everyone makes mistakes etc. are just trying to justify the fact that they are a scummy partner to someone. I get so sick of hearing the reason I cheated is because I was depressed or I was happy or I was working too hard or blah blah blah. The reason you cheated is because you lack moral character and strength and in general are shitty to the person that you are supposed to love the most in the world.
And yes...if you cheat once you cannot with certainty say you will not do it again because you have already failed that test. Obviously if the right situation arrises you cannot be trusted. Boy u sound pretty angry there. | |
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saintsation said: saintsation said: Boy u sound pretty angry there. Not at all. I have absolutely no respect for cheaters so it might come off as harsh but I don't care. | |
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Yes.
Sometimes it's difficult to resist temptation... oh, I don't know, I think there can be so many factors involved in cheating on your partner. Temptation, not ready for a monogamous relationship, your heart being with an ex and jumping into a new relationship too early, problems within your relationship that were never resolved, drugs/alcohol, immaturity or plain straight up, not being able to control your urges and not caring one bit about the feelings of the person your with and needing to take all that's ready and willing. The latter, those people I think are those that "once a cheater, always a cheater" describes. The others, well, I think that those are the ones that make their "mistake" and can honestly never do it again and maybe learn from it. And, I guess I'm not so sure that we're really programmed to be with one person for the rest of our lives. That is not saying that I feel one should cheat on their partner. Eh, but that's another topic entirely, I guess. | |
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brownsugar said: lovemachine said: IMO the people who say that there are reasons to cheat and everyone makes mistakes etc. are just trying to justify the fact that they are a scummy partner to someone. I get so sick of hearing the reason I cheated is because I was depressed or I was happy or I was working too hard or blah blah blah. The reason you cheated is because you lack moral character and strength and in general are shitty to the person that you are supposed to love the most in the world.
And yes...if you cheat once you cannot with certainty say you will not do it again because you have already failed that test. Obviously if the right situation arrises you cannot be trusted. its not that black and white, there are grey areas, but understandibly the person who has been cheated on is not going to see it that way. There really isn't any grey areas when it comes to having no moral character or inner strenth or a sense of what is right and wrong. If you need to cheat end the relationship you are in. It's as simple as that. | |
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lovemachine said: saintsation said: Boy u sound pretty angry there. Not at all. I have absolutely no respect for cheaters so it might come off as harsh but I don't care. Did you know that u and the person who posted this have the same date you joined. WOW!!!! | |
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lovemachine said: brownsugar said: its not that black and white, there are grey areas, but understandibly the person who has been cheated on is not going to see it that way. There really isn't any grey areas when it comes to having no moral character or inner strenth or a sense of what is right and wrong. If you need to cheat end the relationship you are in. It's as simple as that. Well i see it differently, people do learn from mistakes rather u believe in that or not. I mean its like if u did something at work and they told u if u do it again u are fired will u do it again. NO. So people do learn from mistakes u know. Bill Clinton did it so u have no respect for him? | |
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saintsation said: lovemachine said: There really isn't any grey areas when it comes to having no moral character or inner strenth or a sense of what is right and wrong. If you need to cheat end the relationship you are in. It's as simple as that. Well i see it differently, people do learn from mistakes rather u believe in that or not. I mean its like if u did something at work and they told u if u do it again u are fired will u do it again. NO. So people do learn from mistakes u know. Bill Clinton did it so u have no respect for him? Now who said Billy boy learned anything? | |
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saintsation said: lovemachine said: There really isn't any grey areas when it comes to having no moral character or inner strenth or a sense of what is right and wrong. If you need to cheat end the relationship you are in. It's as simple as that. Well i see it differently, people do learn from mistakes rather u believe in that or not. I mean its like if u did something at work and they told u if u do it again u are fired will u do it again. NO. So people do learn from mistakes u know. Bill Clinton did it so u have no respect for him? I gather you have cheated on someone and need to justify it to yourself. The problem with your justifications is that you are acting as if people have no prior knowledge that cheating is wrong. As for Bill Clinton...I have zero respect for a man who will look the American public in the eye and lie and as he is leaving office SELLS pardons. Bill Clinton is a snake. Granted he is a likeable snake but still a snake. | |
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lovemachine said: brownsugar said: its not that black and white, there are grey areas, but understandibly the person who has been cheated on is not going to see it that way. There really isn't any grey areas when it comes to having no moral character or inner strenth or a sense of what is right and wrong. If you need to cheat end the relationship you are in. It's as simple as that. you are right instead of cheating they should just end the relationship. but to say they have no moral charactor i think is a bit too much. we are all human and some of us make choices that are not in our best interest. it is well know that martin luther king was not faithful to his wife, but that does not mean that he was lacking moral charactor, it just means he's human. no everybody doesn't cheat, but just as they may not cheat but be abusive. | |
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Ex-Moderator | lovemachine said: brownsugar said: its not that black and white, there are grey areas, but understandibly the person who has been cheated on is not going to see it that way. There really isn't any grey areas when it comes to having no moral character or inner strenth or a sense of what is right and wrong. If you need to cheat end the relationship you are in. It's as simple as that. I don't think anyone's saying cheating is "right". The topic at hand is can you move on after one person in the relationship has cheated. Obviously, you couldn't. For some people, they can. I think each circumstance is unique, there isn't one way that's gonna work for everybody. So get off your moral high horse already. |
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well back on subject. i dunno if i could ever forgive or want to. it would always be in the back of my mind when i look at them. i would lose alot of trust. its hard for me to trust in the first place. | |
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CarrieMpls said: lovemachine said: There really isn't any grey areas when it comes to having no moral character or inner strenth or a sense of what is right and wrong. If you need to cheat end the relationship you are in. It's as simple as that. I don't think anyone's saying cheating is "right". The topic at hand is can you move on after one person in the relationship has cheated. Obviously, you couldn't. For some people, they can. I think each circumstance is unique, there isn't one way that's gonna work for everybody. So get off your moral high horse already. If you read the posts in this thread you will find many people making excuses for people who cheat which in turn is making it alright and it is not. It's not a moral high horse it is simply what is right and what is wrong. I get so tired of people making excuses for all their shitty behaviours. Nothing is ever anyones fault. As for taking someone back. Nope because I wouldn't respect them. | |
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Ex-Moderator | lovemachine said: CarrieMpls said: I don't think anyone's saying cheating is "right". The topic at hand is can you move on after one person in the relationship has cheated. Obviously, you couldn't. For some people, they can. I think each circumstance is unique, there isn't one way that's gonna work for everybody. So get off your moral high horse already. If you read the posts in this thread you will find many people making excuses for people who cheat which in turn is making it alright and it is not. It's not a moral high horse it is simply what is right and what is wrong. I get so tired of people making excuses for all their shitty behaviours. Nothing is ever anyones fault. As for taking someone back. Nope because I wouldn't respect them. I hear what you're saying. And I agree there are no excuses. But I've also known people in my life who have cheated. They are good people who have made mistakes. I don't think any of them thought what they were doing was OK, in fact I've seen them wracked with guilt over it. So I think under certain circumstances, a couple can work things out eventually. Easy to do? Hell no! Possible? yes. for some. |
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luv4u said: saintsation said: According to 98 percent of the people on here thats not the case including me. It takes bad things to make relatioships stronger. I know if me and my significant other really get back together i will not even look at anybody else like that no matter how high or depress i get. When I am in a relationship I don't look at any other man, or get involved with another man or flirt. I am loyal and expect the same from the other person. When you get cheated on then the trust is gone - No trust, no relationship. cutie! Check it out ...Shiny Toy Guns R gonna blowup VERY soon and bring melody back to music..you heard it here 1st! http://www.myspacecomment...theone.mp3 | |
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Thank god oral sex isn't considered cheating! When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. | |
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Mazerati said: luv4u said: When I am in a relationship I don't look at any other man, or get involved with another man or flirt. I am loyal and expect the same from the other person. When you get cheated on then the trust is gone - No trust, no relationship. cutie! Handsome Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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lovemachine said: IMO the people who say that there are reasons to cheat and everyone makes mistakes etc. are just trying to justify the fact that they are a scummy partner to someone. I get so sick of hearing the reason I cheated is because I was depressed or I was happy or I was working too hard or blah blah blah. The reason you cheated is because you lack moral character and strength and in general are shitty to the person that you are supposed to love the most in the world.
And yes...if you cheat once you cannot with certainty say you will not do it again because you have already failed that test. Obviously if the right situation arrises you cannot be trusted. wow, do you want a sugar cube for your high horse? | |
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CarrieMpls said: I don't think anyone's saying cheating is "right". The topic at hand is can you move on after one person in the relationship has cheated. Obviously, you couldn't. For some people, they can. I think each circumstance is unique, there isn't one way that's gonna work for everybody.
Beautiful, wise words. | |
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