I look back on a period of my life when I felt really low. Maybe I was depressed but when I look at the bigger picture, maybe I was feeling just deeply sorry for myself. For sure, I could not focus and it even resulted in me losing a job I regret to say. I did certainly go off the rails and made a collective of erronous mistakes in my life.

I did not take any medication nor consult anyone with how I was feeling at the time. I remember my Mum talking to me and we both got upset when she asked me if I needed to see a councillor which I never did. Maybe I just felt I didnt need to and that I would pull through.

Maybe I should of accepted the way that I was feeling was a condition off set by a series of bad mistakes and events making it harder to pull myself through it and let it wash over me. But then looking back in hindsight, I cant make the distinction as to whether I was feeling sorry for myself or that I clearly was depressed. Declaring that 'oh I was depressed' to someone makes me feel sort of guilty.

How can you make the distinction between being depressed and just feeling sorry for oneself?

I don't think a person can.

I don't think those he loves can.

You simply have to seek counseling to get it diagnosed.

When I'm feeling blue (I get seasonally depressed), I force myself to the gym at all cost, no matter how I feel. It tends to get me through winter and I'm back to being the stupid happy me I am in summer.

I get drunk and run away from all my problems!

'Feeling sorry for yourself' is just a name that apathetic people give for depression.

TaoOfGimp said:

I love that avatar! Where did U get it?

ummm... don't know that I'm very good at this, but clinical depression tends to be for no real reason at all. Sure, you can always correlate a bunch of coincidental reasons if you want to. And sometimes those things going on in your life are the symptoms of depression, not the cause of it... the whole vicious spiral effect.
It can be very difficult to figure out.
In either case, no shame in asking for help if you need it, though for me particularly that is easier said than done.

doctormcmeekle said:

i sit in a room and cry
kinda like i am now..

SammiJ said:

Yikes!

When I am depressed (I have Bipolar Disorder) it's never because of something, there's never a reason, it just happens, therefore, nothing to feel sorry for myself about.

AsianBomb777 said:

I can't remember. Some bondage site... I suppose the site wasn't that interesting as it's not in my bookmarks

feeling sorry for yourself is depression. sometimes i don't like the person that i am and i get depressed. when i feel like that i go and work on my art and it always takes me outta that negative mode.

If it's all behind you now and it hasn't been a structural problem don't worry about it.

JDINTERACTIVE said:

that's a hard line to draw...I've been there too (and almost crossed the line - to cut a long story short I'm very lucky to still be around)

We just need to try and remember what and who we have in our lives that make it all worthwhile

there are periods of time when i feel this way as well. i'm shocked though to see how i'm not alone cuz i always thought i was being pathetic and should just be thankful for what i have, but it doesn't seem to soothe me when i get into that mood.

when i start to feel sorry for myself, it starts when I feel very lonely, everybody i know is busy doing their thing and i'm at home left with a tv and a bunch of dvd's that i don't want to watch. most of the time, i just go to sleep even when i'm not sleepy just so that I won't cry the rest of the night. When i get angry i cry myself to sleep.

Sometimes i feel ashamed when i get this way because i know that somewhere there is a person who is really down and out, and here i am feeling bad for no reason at all.

missfee said:

Everyone gets lonely but this is sad to me because you don't love yourself enough to not need another person to be happy. Then again, I hope I'm completely wrong.

missfee said:

all I can say is that I SO know what you mean hang in there and know you ARE loved

diagnosis usually helps, but doctors/therapists usually know less about the truth of the matter than you do. they can only hope to point you in the right direction. ultimately you have to solve it yourself.

Slave2daGroove said:

well, don't misunderstand me, I only get this way in periods, i don't feel this way 24\7. Most of the time i'm happy and i make others happy which makes me even happier, but it just the selective periods of time when that feeling sneaks up on me...thats all. I eventually find someway to get over it, that is until it happens again. Overall, i'm okay.

another factor with me anyway is that i love to get attention, without being obvious. My daddy use to give me this attention all the time, but he passed away 4 years ago, and so i've had to deal with not getting that extra "daddy's girl" attention from him. It's really hard, but i think it will help me in the long run, to learn to live the fact that emotionally i'm on my own...

Great thread, JD! Lots of people have had good things to say here. I just wanted to add that I think that depression inherently IS self-centered and narcissistic. That doesn't necessarily mean that people can just snap out of it, so to speak, I firmly do believe that true clinical depression is about brain chemistry. But what's annoying about depression is that it's an inability to get outside of one's own head. When I'm working with clients who are depressed, or even when I've got a friend who's bitching, I tend to suggest that focusing outward and doing something for someone else can be very therapeutic.

However, where that can backfire is when someone who is depressed focuses on others' lives so much that they neglect their own issues (VERY common). Many of us are great at solving others' problems while we're totally flummoxed by our own.

RazzBeret said:

im SOOOOO feeling you right now

nakedpianoplayer said:

yep...it's a combination of environmental and biological reasons (chemical imbalance).

I struggled with depression on and off for almost my entire life, until I figured out that I actually corresponded to an adult case of ADD. Too much Sesame Street as a child? I try to keep my own kid away from TV, but it's tough. We don't have one in the house.

Now I just accept myself the way that I am, and go with it. I see it not so much as a disorder as a different way of thinking that doesn't always correspond to the structures set in place by occidental civilisation... for that reason, I quit high school and schooled myself until college.

It helps to find one's own path, and pursue it.

nakedpianoplayer said:

Awww, thanks!