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Injuries to your Private Parts. True story: Once upon-a-time, when I was a wee youngen of about 6 or 7 years, I was nekid. And playing with the cat. In the lounge. I began teasing it. The cat. And then for some unknown, but strictly un-sexual reason, I decided to shake my willy in it's face. It swiped it's paw, there was lots of blood, and I had my first ever religious experience.
Have you ever injured your privates? (Mods: my thread concerning, "embarrassing threads too scared to post" can be deleted, ta. ) ..... BULLSEYE! | |
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Ex-Moderator | I'm sorry, but the mental image of a nekkid 7 year old "shaking his willy" in front of a cat... Too funny. As for me, I had a cat from hell (HELL, I tell you!) when I was very young. And I don't even remember what I was doing, prolly holding him while he was trying to get away and he ended up scratching my nipple right through my shirt. Blood and all. It was awful! |
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can you say 8 yr old
bananna seat wet bathing suit bike jump | |
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CarrieMpls said: I'm sorry, but the mental image of a nekkid 7 year old "shaking his willy" in front of a cat... Too funny. As for me, I had a cat from hell (HELL, I tell you!) when I was very young. And I don't even remember what I was doing, prolly holding him while he was trying to get away and he ended up scratching my nipple right through my shirt. Blood and all. It was awful! Ouch!!!!! Is the nipple Ok now? Are you sure you weren't shaking it in the cats face? They don't like willys. Maybe nipples are the same to them ..... BULLSEYE! | |
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Mach said: can you say 8 yr old
bananna seat wet bathing suit bike jump I've got a feeling that hurts some, but what's a banana seat? ..... BULLSEYE! | |
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Taureau said: Mach said: can you say 8 yr old
bananna seat wet bathing suit bike jump I've got a feeling that hurts some, but what's a banana seat? | |
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Mach said: Taureau said: I've got a feeling that hurts some, but what's a banana seat? That bike looks like the chopper that I had ..... BULLSEYE! | |
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Ex-Moderator | Taureau said: CarrieMpls said: I'm sorry, but the mental image of a nekkid 7 year old "shaking his willy" in front of a cat... Too funny. As for me, I had a cat from hell (HELL, I tell you!) when I was very young. And I don't even remember what I was doing, prolly holding him while he was trying to get away and he ended up scratching my nipple right through my shirt. Blood and all. It was awful! Ouch!!!!! Is the nipple Ok now? Are you sure you weren't shaking it in the cats face? They don't like willys. Maybe nipples are the same to them The nipple is fine, thanks for asking. And no, I'm quite sure I wasn't shaking it in his face. Perhaps jiggling a little, but definitely not shaking. |
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Taureau said: True story: Once upon-a-time, when I was a wee youngen of about 6 or 7 years, I was nekid. And playing with the cat. In the lounge. I began teasing it. The cat. And then for some unknown, but strictly un-sexual reason, I decided to shake my willy in it's face. It swiped it's paw, there was lots of blood, and I had my first ever religious experience.
So you invented the Mr. Elephant meets Mr. Tiger Dance | |
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PANDURITO said: Taureau said: True story: Once upon-a-time, when I was a wee youngen of about 6 or 7 years, I was nekid. And playing with the cat. In the lounge. I began teasing it. The cat. And then for some unknown, but strictly un-sexual reason, I decided to shake my willy in it's face. It swiped it's paw, there was lots of blood, and I had my first ever religious experience.
So you invented the Mr. Elephant meets Mr. Tiger Dance That I gotta see! ..... BULLSEYE! | |
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I was 8
Had to pee Unzipped my pants A little "fast-ly" Weenie got stuck what the f*ck It was only the foreskin (when I had it still) Boy did that suck. MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits" | |
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Oh hell yeah!!
7 years ago, on a routine morning getting ready for work, I just finished walking the dog and was going upstairs for my shower. I got to the top of the stairs and an enormously excruciating pain shot right into my right testicle!!! I mean pain so intense I could not even breathe correctly. I had to take short little breaths it hurt so bad. So, not ever having to experience this kind of pain, I knew something was very wrong so I had to get to my phone, a cordless that was on its harness back downstairs!! It took me an entire hour and a half to get down the steps with my right testicle causing me to scream and holler like a pig!!! I got to the phone and called 911 and immediately yelled into the phone for an ambulance to come to my house! I didn't even attempt any fuckin candor or sugarcoating! It was just me screaming to get someone here fast! Turns out, I had what is called a testicular tursion, which is when your testicle gets tangled up in a vein!! My fuckin ball twisted up in a vein!!!!! Had it lasted about thirty minutes more; it would have died and I would have had to get it removed! It gets better or worse, depending on how you look at it. I went to the doctor the next day and he told me that I had to get surgery because it can and would most likely occur again. So the SURGERY!!!! I had to have BOTH testicles surgically stitched to the scrotum sack so neither would ever slip out of place and get tangled up again. In order to secure their positions, they stitched my balls to my sack from the inside by stitching two sides of each testicle to the scrotum sack from the INSIDE! Once the procedure was done my balls were swollen to the size ot TENNIS BALLS and I had to endure CONSTANT PAIN for three days straight!!! I had never ever had to rely on pain pills and morphine as I did in those days. I got home and my boys all came over to clown then show compassion after they seen how much pain I had to endure for 72 straight hours while my balls swelling went down! I stayed high, drunk and fucked up on percasets for the entire time! Absolutely the most excruciating pain I have EVER had!!! The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. -- Mark Twain.
BOB JOHNSON IS PART OF THE PROBLEM!! | |
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DexMSR said: Oh hell yeah!!
7 years ago, on a routine morning getting ready for work, I just finished walking the dog and was going upstairs for my shower. I got to the top of the stairs and an enormously excruciating pain shot right into my right testicle!!! I mean pain so intense I could not even breathe correctly. I had to take short little breaths it hurt so bad. So, not ever having to experience this kind of pain, I knew something was very wrong so I had to get to my phone, a cordless that was on its harness back downstairs!! It took me an entire hour and a half to get down the steps with my right testicle causing me to scream and holler like a pig!!! I got to the phone and called 911 and immediately yelled into the phone for an ambulance to come to my house! I didn't even attempt any fuckin candor or sugarcoating! It was just me screaming to get someone here fast! Turns out, I had what is called a testicular tursion, which is when your testicle gets tangled up in a vein!! My fuckin ball twisted up in a vein!!!!! Had it lasted about thirty minutes more; it would have died and I would have had to get it removed! It gets better or worse, depending on how you look at it. I went to the doctor the next day and he told me that I had to get surgery because it can and would most likely occur again. So the SURGERY!!!! I had to have BOTH testicles surgically stitched to the scrotum sack so neither would ever slip out of place and get tangled up again. In order to secure their positions, they stitched my balls to my sack from the inside by stitching two sides of each testicle to the scrotum sack from the INSIDE! Once the procedure was done my balls were swollen to the size ot TENNIS BALLS and I had to endure CONSTANT PAIN for three days straight!!! I had never ever had to rely on pain pills and morphine as I did in those days. I got home and my boys all came over to clown then show compassion after they seen how much pain I had to endure for 72 straight hours while my balls swelling went down! I stayed high, drunk and fucked up on percasets for the entire time! Absolutely the most excruciating pain I have EVER had!!! Unknown to me why-- but i like the swollen balls part. forgive me dex Otherwise it sounds horrible. when i was about 7-8 my mother used to put my afterschool snacks on top of the fridge. I used to be lazy and stand on top of the counter to get them. i fell one day right onto the dish drain. On the blade of one of the biggest knife in the house. Couldnt tell mom. She woulda kicked my ass fo rstanding on the counter. She still doesnt know. luckily i didnt jook myself up. unluckily i had a large and deep scratch... a scar is on my right nipple to this day. [Edited 4/5/05 9:56am] Dynamic Savior Said: Also, do you think that ugly people are God's cruel joke on humanity (like the platypus and the heterosexual) or another form of population control? | |
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cinnamonjo said: DexMSR said: Oh hell yeah!!
7 years ago, on a routine morning getting ready for work, I just finished walking the dog and was going upstairs for my shower. I got to the top of the stairs and an enormously excruciating pain shot right into my right testicle!!! I mean pain so intense I could not even breathe correctly. I had to take short little breaths it hurt so bad. So, not ever having to experience this kind of pain, I knew something was very wrong so I had to get to my phone, a cordless that was on its harness back downstairs!! It took me an entire hour and a half to get down the steps with my right testicle causing me to scream and holler like a pig!!! I got to the phone and called 911 and immediately yelled into the phone for an ambulance to come to my house! I didn't even attempt any fuckin candor or sugarcoating! It was just me screaming to get someone here fast! Turns out, I had what is called a testicular tursion, which is when your testicle gets tangled up in a vein!! My fuckin ball twisted up in a vein!!!!! Had it lasted about thirty minutes more; it would have died and I would have had to get it removed! It gets better or worse, depending on how you look at it. I went to the doctor the next day and he told me that I had to get surgery because it can and would most likely occur again. So the SURGERY!!!! I had to have BOTH testicles surgically stitched to the scrotum sack so neither would ever slip out of place and get tangled up again. In order to secure their positions, they stitched my balls to my sack from the inside by stitching two sides of each testicle to the scrotum sack from the INSIDE! Once the procedure was done my balls were swollen to the size ot TENNIS BALLS and I had to endure CONSTANT PAIN for three days straight!!! I had never ever had to rely on pain pills and morphine as I did in those days. I got home and my boys all came over to clown then show compassion after they seen how much pain I had to endure for 72 straight hours while my balls swelling went down! I stayed high, drunk and fucked up on percasets for the entire time! Absolutely the most excruciating pain I have EVER had!!! Unknown to me why-- but i like the swollen balls part. forgive me dex Otherwise it sounds horrible. when i was about 7-8 my mother used to put my afterschool snacks on top of the fridge. I used to be lazy and stand on top of the counter to get them. i fell one day right onto the dish drain. On the blade of one of the biggest knife in the house. luckily i didnt jook myself up. unluckily i had a large and deep scratch... a scar is on my right nipple to this day. [Edited 4/5/05 9:55am] Whap whap! The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. -- Mark Twain.
BOB JOHNSON IS PART OF THE PROBLEM!! | |
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pt. II
I also walked into a fire hydrant once. I stood there bent over so far my friends thought i was tying my shoe (they couldnt even see the hydrant.) I was ass up on 66th and broadway for about 8 minutes. Dynamic Savior Said: Also, do you think that ugly people are God's cruel joke on humanity (like the platypus and the heterosexual) or another form of population control? | |
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DexMSR said: Oh hell yeah!!
7 years ago, on a routine morning getting ready for work, I just finished walking the dog and was going upstairs for my shower. I got to the top of the stairs and an enormously excruciating pain shot right into my right testicle!!! I mean pain so intense I could not even breathe correctly. I had to take short little breaths it hurt so bad. So, not ever having to experience this kind of pain, I knew something was very wrong so I had to get to my phone, a cordless that was on its harness back downstairs!! It took me an entire hour and a half to get down the steps with my right testicle causing me to scream and holler like a pig!!! I got to the phone and called 911 and immediately yelled into the phone for an ambulance to come to my house! I didn't even attempt any fuckin candor or sugarcoating! It was just me screaming to get someone here fast! Turns out, I had what is called a testicular tursion, which is when your testicle gets tangled up in a vein!! My fuckin ball twisted up in a vein!!!!! Had it lasted about thirty minutes more; it would have died and I would have had to get it removed! It gets better or worse, depending on how you look at it. I went to the doctor the next day and he told me that I had to get surgery because it can and would most likely occur again. So the SURGERY!!!! I had to have BOTH testicles surgically stitched to the scrotum sack so neither would ever slip out of place and get tangled up again. In order to secure their positions, they stitched my balls to my sack from the inside by stitching two sides of each testicle to the scrotum sack from the INSIDE! Once the procedure was done my balls were swollen to the size ot TENNIS BALLS and I had to endure CONSTANT PAIN for three days straight!!! I had never ever had to rely on pain pills and morphine as I did in those days. I got home and my boys all came over to clown then show compassion after they seen how much pain I had to endure for 72 straight hours while my balls swelling went down! I stayed high, drunk and fucked up on percasets for the entire time! Absolutely the most excruciating pain I have EVER had!!! :fainting-as-I-read-the-story-continue-reading-faint-again: It's hard for me to read "ball" stories since mine are so sensitive. Dex I feel your pain..... MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits" | |
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All I have to say is this: DO NOT USE NAIR TO REMOVE HAIR ON ANY AREA THAT'S MORE THAN THE BIKINI line!! Or at least be very careful. The skin on the hood of my clit grew back just fine and the sensation is back also. Good as new! Shake....shake, shake, shake. | |
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Taureau said: True story: Once upon-a-time, when I was a wee youngen of about 6 or 7 years, I was nekid. And playing with the cat. In the lounge. I began teasing it. The cat. And then for some unknown, but strictly un-sexual reason, I decided to shake my willy in it's face. It swiped it's paw, there was lots of blood, and I had my first ever religious experience.
Have you ever injured your privates? (Mods: my thread concerning, "embarrassing threads too scared to post" can be deleted, ta. ) I'm sorry but | |
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I had to get my vagina sewed up last week. | |
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DexMSR said: Oh hell yeah!!
7 years ago, on a routine morning getting ready for work, I just finished walking the dog and was going upstairs for my shower. I got to the top of the stairs and an enormously excruciating pain shot right into my right testicle!!! I mean pain so intense I could not even breathe correctly. I had to take short little breaths it hurt so bad. So, not ever having to experience this kind of pain, I knew something was very wrong so I had to get to my phone, a cordless that was on its harness back downstairs!! It took me an entire hour and a half to get down the steps with my right testicle causing me to scream and holler like a pig!!! I got to the phone and called 911 and immediately yelled into the phone for an ambulance to come to my house! I didn't even attempt any fuckin candor or sugarcoating! It was just me screaming to get someone here fast! Turns out, I had what is called a testicular tursion, which is when your testicle gets tangled up in a vein!! My fuckin ball twisted up in a vein!!!!! Had it lasted about thirty minutes more; it would have died and I would have had to get it removed! It gets better or worse, depending on how you look at it. I went to the doctor the next day and he told me that I had to get surgery because it can and would most likely occur again. So the SURGERY!!!! I had to have BOTH testicles surgically stitched to the scrotum sack so neither would ever slip out of place and get tangled up again. In order to secure their positions, they stitched my balls to my sack from the inside by stitching two sides of each testicle to the scrotum sack from the INSIDE! Once the procedure was done my balls were swollen to the size ot TENNIS BALLS and I had to endure CONSTANT PAIN for three days straight!!! I had never ever had to rely on pain pills and morphine as I did in those days. I got home and my boys all came over to clown then show compassion after they seen how much pain I had to endure for 72 straight hours while my balls swelling went down! I stayed high, drunk and fucked up on percasets for the entire time! Absolutely the most excruciating pain I have EVER had!!! My son had something simular but he was two years old at that time and didn't need the surgery. I heared his crying for days in my sleep after it happened It hurts I know | |
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DexMSR said: Oh hell yeah!!
7 years ago, on a routine morning getting ready for work, I just finished walking the dog and was going upstairs for my shower. I got to the top of the stairs and an enormously excruciating pain shot right into my right testicle!!! I mean pain so intense I could not even breathe correctly. I had to take short little breaths it hurt so bad. So, not ever having to experience this kind of pain, I knew something was very wrong so I had to get to my phone, a cordless that was on its harness back downstairs!! It took me an entire hour and a half to get down the steps with my right testicle causing me to scream and holler like a pig!!! I got to the phone and called 911 and immediately yelled into the phone for an ambulance to come to my house! I didn't even attempt any fuckin candor or sugarcoating! It was just me screaming to get someone here fast! Turns out, I had what is called a testicular tursion, which is when your testicle gets tangled up in a vein!! My fuckin ball twisted up in a vein!!!!! Had it lasted about thirty minutes more; it would have died and I would have had to get it removed! It gets better or worse, depending on how you look at it. I went to the doctor the next day and he told me that I had to get surgery because it can and would most likely occur again. So the SURGERY!!!! I had to have BOTH testicles surgically stitched to the scrotum sack so neither would ever slip out of place and get tangled up again. In order to secure their positions, they stitched my balls to my sack from the inside by stitching two sides of each testicle to the scrotum sack from the INSIDE! Once the procedure was done my balls were swollen to the size ot TENNIS BALLS and I had to endure CONSTANT PAIN for three days straight!!! I had never ever had to rely on pain pills and morphine as I did in those days. I got home and my boys all came over to clown then show compassion after they seen how much pain I had to endure for 72 straight hours while my balls swelling went down! I stayed high, drunk and fucked up on percasets for the entire time! Absolutely the most excruciating pain I have EVER had!!! Dex, you are my Org Hero. I worship your balls ..... BULLSEYE! | |
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AndGodCreatedMe said: DexMSR said: Oh hell yeah!!
7 years ago, on a routine morning getting ready for work, I just finished walking the dog and was going upstairs for my shower. I got to the top of the stairs and an enormously excruciating pain shot right into my right testicle!!! I mean pain so intense I could not even breathe correctly. I had to take short little breaths it hurt so bad. So, not ever having to experience this kind of pain, I knew something was very wrong so I had to get to my phone, a cordless that was on its harness back downstairs!! It took me an entire hour and a half to get down the steps with my right testicle causing me to scream and holler like a pig!!! I got to the phone and called 911 and immediately yelled into the phone for an ambulance to come to my house! I didn't even attempt any fuckin candor or sugarcoating! It was just me screaming to get someone here fast! Turns out, I had what is called a testicular tursion, which is when your testicle gets tangled up in a vein!! My fuckin ball twisted up in a vein!!!!! Had it lasted about thirty minutes more; it would have died and I would have had to get it removed! It gets better or worse, depending on how you look at it. I went to the doctor the next day and he told me that I had to get surgery because it can and would most likely occur again. So the SURGERY!!!! I had to have BOTH testicles surgically stitched to the scrotum sack so neither would ever slip out of place and get tangled up again. In order to secure their positions, they stitched my balls to my sack from the inside by stitching two sides of each testicle to the scrotum sack from the INSIDE! Once the procedure was done my balls were swollen to the size ot TENNIS BALLS and I had to endure CONSTANT PAIN for three days straight!!! I had never ever had to rely on pain pills and morphine as I did in those days. I got home and my boys all came over to clown then show compassion after they seen how much pain I had to endure for 72 straight hours while my balls swelling went down! I stayed high, drunk and fucked up on percasets for the entire time! Absolutely the most excruciating pain I have EVER had!!! My son had something simular but he was two years old at that time and didn't need the surgery. I heared his crying for days in my sleep after it happened It hurts I know You may want to monitor that even if he didn't get the surgery...it is a rare condition that happens because the way our testicles fall into place during the developments in the womb...so be sure to monitor it carefully as he grows. The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. -- Mark Twain.
BOB JOHNSON IS PART OF THE PROBLEM!! | |
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Getting hit by tennis ball in privates never fails to hurt some.
The pain goes up into ur lower stomach. | |
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ReturnOfDOOK said: I had to get my vagina sewed up last week.
So when are ya gonna let me out then? ..... BULLSEYE! | |
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DexMSR said: You may want to monitor that even if he didn't get the surgery...it is a rare condition that happens because the way our testicles fall into place during the developments in the womb...so be sure to monitor it carefully as he grows.
Momma! What are YOU doing? Stop it Momma! | |
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Taureau said: ReturnOfDOOK said: I had to get my vagina sewed up last week.
So when are ya gonna let me out then? When u grow up | |
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DexMSR said: AndGodCreatedMe said: My son had something simular but he was two years old at that time and didn't need the surgery. I heared his crying for days in my sleep after it happened It hurts I know You may want to monitor that even if he didn't get the surgery...it is a rare condition that happens because the way our testicles fall into place during the developments in the womb...so be sure to monitor it carefully as he grows. I know The paediatrician said he needed a check up when he would be 16...he's 16 now Now you try to get an 16 to the doctor for such an examination Don't worry, I won the arguments with explaining him the reasons and he allready made an appointment. | |
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story similar to mach's...funnily i had blocked the memory of it out of my mind until my sister reminded me of it recently.
remember how you would ride your bike without sitting down? i was probably 6 or so and biking fast when my feet slipped out from the pedals and i crashed down on the bar. i don't remember what happened immediately after that although i do remember holding cool cloths over the area to try to soothe it... that and that my entire pubic area was a horrible shade of purple for a loooong time. | |
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emm said: story similar to mach's...funnily i had blocked the memory of it out of my mind until my sister reminded me of it recently.
remember how you would ride your bike without sitting down? i was probably 6 or so and biking fast when my feet slipped out from the pedals and i crashed down on the bar. i don't remember what happened immediately after that although i do remember holding cool cloths over the area to try to soothe it... that and that my entire pubic area was a horrible shade of purple for a loooong time. ..... BULLSEYE! | |
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you are crazy...
now shake that thang! | |
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