I guess I might as well turn this account into a real alter-ego (a Devil's advocate, if you will).

Question: If you are able to sexually satisfy yourself (i.e. masturbation), why is there a need to have a "partner"? Since the divorce rate is almost 50% and that does not even take into account separations, unhappy unions or relationships where one or both partners is cheating on the other, why would you even bother entering into one? Especially, why would a man enter into a marriage (with so much at stake financially)?

I guess what I'm askin' is, "Why are we driven to find a 'partner'?" Why can't we just jerk-off and watch TV?

2ndaccount said:

Ahhh...the million dollar question.

Well after being to the point of total and utter disdain for relationship dynamics; I have to say that while I am alone right now, there is nothing like being able to share your life experience with someone with the same affinity for living as you do, but finding that partner is like the most tumultuous life endeavor ever created, but worth the effort!

I don't subscribe to the bullshit capitalistic venture called Marriage myself, but I know I'd like to be in a relationship with someone that is on that level as well. My soulmates either came at a time when a solid relationship was out of the question because I hadn't begun living yet, or it was just the timing due to life situations of both sides, but I will forever relish in the thoughts of ever being able to share a piece of my world with four of the most extraordinary women of my world!!!

God Bless

1. T.R.
2. S.A.
3. I.V.B.
4. A.D.

I will cherish your energies forever!

DexMSR said:

But can't you experience that with friends and/or family?

2ndaccount said:

But before long you seek love right?

DexMSR said:

But isn't what you're seeking really unattainable? Doesn't the hurt that is possible (and likely) outweigh the benefits of having a "partner"? What are the benefits of having a partner, anyway, if you can have everything else except the physical intimacy with friends and/or family?

I have said this before, but I have found the chase of getting a girl is often more fun then the prize itself. As for 1 night stands, no chase at all really.....

I know this is sooooo obvious, but without realtionships, we would not exist.
[Edited 4/5/05 10:30am]

DexMSR said:

Did you kill them?

thesexofit said:

Very true. The chase is often more exciting than the catch.


Without sex we would not exist.

? U reckon love is just like a friend u have sex with?

thesexofit said:

Couldn't you say the word "love" has many different meanings to many different people and that the general perception of the word is romanticized? Isn't what most people define as "love" just your best friend that you bone (or who bones you?).

I agree that love comes in many flavors, (friendship, family, "romantic", love for your fellow man, etc.) but the love we're talking about is more than just "boning a best friend". Love puts the butterflies in your tummy. My friends don't put butterflies in my tummy. And its not entirely sexual.

CarrieMpls said:

Do you find that those "butterflies" last?

But its nicer when its done to you ,then doing it to yourself

2ndaccount said:

I was with someone for almost a decade who put the butterflies in my tummy for years. I wouldn't trade that experience (good and bad) for anything.

2ndaccount said:

Well, the longest relationship I ever had was about 2 years, if you count the make up and break up stuff that got dragged all out. And thinking back, yeah, even at the end the butterflies were there.
But would they be there after 20 years? I don't know. I suppose it depends on the people. But I know some couples who've been together for years and years and you can still see the butterflies between them. Not incessantly like at the beginning of a relationship. But in the little things.
And sure, I've seen the reverse, the couples where you wonder why they bother...
But I guess I still want the butterflies

I would always want somebody else to please me than pleasing myself. Just the touch of someone you love touching u and u holding them and they pleasing u in every way is heaven. Believe me i had the best for 2 and a half years and wish wit hall my heart i can get it back.

well to quote one of the cheesiest films i have seen this year

we strive for a relationship to have a "witness to our lives"

so we are not forgotton

To feel what we fell to i.e be our other half and share our hopes, dreams and when we fail.

someone who cares you got promoted

someone who cares that we had a crap day at work

someone who cares that we have a terrible headache

someone to acknowledge our being.

DexMSR said:

lol@IVB

saintsation said:

p0pRocks said:

Aren't our friends and family "witness(es) to our lives"?

2ndaccount said:

yes but they often have other things going on, you don't go home to them unless you are in a cult.

hmmm

is that what you are trying to do start a cult where we all give free love ans screw relationships

p0pRocks said:

And your partner doesn't have other things going on (like perhaps boning someone else? )? And why do you need to go home to them - isn't that what phones are for?

As for the cult idea, never thought of that, but perhaps I could start one where people do nothing but masturbate and watch TV.

p0pRocks said:

I just want a harem.

The question by the topic starter is cute and all, but how does finding the answer enrich our lives?

analbolique said:

How does anything enrich your life? Same way, I 'spose.

2ndaccount said:

I can at least say my partner was faithful. o doubt about that. I was the one who was stupid when i was in a depression 11 months ago and got caught for it. I know it is not worth cheating or sleeping with someone else when u already have someone u love to death, they the best looking thing u ever seen, and they the best. No matter how depressed , high, or tempted you are never do it.

2ndaccount said:

I suppose some are only interested in mindless fun, but knowledge and experiences do enrich mine.

relationships outside of family and relatives is very much needed, for me at least. Yes, your family (if you have a true and loving one) will love you unconditionally for who you are, but there are also times when you need a person who is not related to you to give you warmth, and comfort and sometimes a nice hug and "its gonna be okay" when you are down.

I'm libra, and libras love to have someone close to them to tell them a lot how lovable we are. I know with most guys, they don't like to talk about their feelings a lot, where as most women would like to hear it. But its the little things that guys do that turns me on while i'm in a relationship.

I guess it just depends on the person really because some people like to be alone. But i don't ...

analbolique said:

And aren't we gaining some knowledge here?

2ndaccount said:

HEY the cult thing is my idea

I am going to be the founder of the unloved orger society



And your partner/ well mine would have to have the same aspirations as me you can choose your partner and if they don't work out get rid of them very much unlike family

p0pRocks said:

But what about friends?